Aubrey Plaza Could Rape You And Totally Get Away With It

[The Question]

Because,

1. She's a woman, and they can do that just by default, but plus,

2. She's a celebrity (kind of) and you're (probably) not.

So that's, like, a two-fer. Aubrey Plaza could almost certainly just break into your place of residence, ASMR-whisper at you (as she is known to do) until your sproing-er goes 'sproing', then hop on and ride you like a stolen bicycle.

And she's get clean away with it, because she's a cute adult female type VERTEBRATE and they can do that.

And you can't stop her. CAN YOU, NO YOU CAN'T MR. DATA DON'T EVEN TRY

 

[The Question]

On a similar note:

Liam Neeson Could Throw Dill Pickles At You And You'd Probably Just Put Up With It

Because,

1. He's got that weird-ass scary Irish accent instead of the normal jolly Irish accent, and you wouldn't want to risk a conversation breaking out if you tell him to stop it, but mostly because

2. You'd probably just be stood there stunned and confused by such a weird and improbable occurrence, to the point where, by the time your TORTURED BRAIN fully grasped what was happening, then actually accepted it, then formulated a reaction, and then was finally ready to execute said reaction...!

He'd have got bored of doing it, stopped on his own, and wandered off.

 

[Loktar]

On a similar note:

Liam Neeson Could Throw Dill Pickles At You And You'd Probably Just Put Up With It

Because,

1. He's got that weird-ass scary Irish accent instead of the normal jolly Irish accent, and you wouldn't want to risk a conversation breaking out if you tell him to stop it, but mostly because

2. You'd probably just be stood there stunned and confused by such a weird and improbable occurrence, to the point where, by the time your TORTURED BRAIN fully grasped what was happening, then actually accepted it, then formulated a reaction, and then was finally ready to execute said reaction...!

He'd have got bored of doing it, stopped on his own, and wandered off.

I'd totally let Liam Neeson throw dill pickles at me. 1) I love dill pickles 2) After he was done throwing pickles at me, I'd get dressed up in a teddy bear onesie and ask if he'd do that scene from Ted 2 with me.

 

[The Question]

I'm all but certain I don't want to know what 'that scene from Ted 2' entails, THANK YOU VERY MULCH?!

 

[Loktar]

I'm all but certain I don't want to know what 'that scene from Ted 2' entails, THANK YOU VERY MULCH?!

 

[Chuckles51]

 

[The Question]

Okay, I expected the thing you were referring to to involve some weird, deranged sex thing.

What it actually was, was way more disturbing than that.