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4 Idol Worshoippers (jew pigs, and xtian crusader theives)

Neqamahel

New member
# [2.7] Allah has set a seal upon their hearts and upon their hearing and there is a covering over their eyes, and there is a great punishment for them.
# [2.8] And there are some people who say: We believe in Allah and the last day; and they are not at all believers.
# [2.9] They desire to deceive Allah and those who believe, and they deceive only themselves and they do not perceive.
# [2.10] There is a disease in their hearts, so Allah added to their disease and they shall have a painful chastisement because they lied.
# [2.15] Allah shall pay them back their mockery, and He leaves them alone in their inordinacy, blindly wandering on.
# [2.17] Their parable is like the parable of one who kindled a fire but when it had illumined all around him, Allah took away their light, and left them in utter darkness-- they do not see.
# [2.19] Or like abundant rain from the cloud in which is utter darkness and thunder and lightning; they put their fingers into their ears because of the thunder peal, for fear of death, and Allah encompasses the unbelievers.
# [2.20] The lightning almost takes away their sight; whenever it shines on them they walk in it, and when it becomes dark to them they stand still; and if Allah had pleased He would certainly have taken away their hearing and their sight; surely Allah has power over all things.
# [2.22] Who made the earth a resting place for you and the heaven a canopy and (Who) sends down rain from the cloud then brings forth with it subsistence for you of the fruits; therefore do not set up rivals to Allah while you know.
# [2.23] And if you are in doubt as to that which We have revealed to Our servant, then produce a chapter like it and call on your witnesses besides Allah if you are truthful.
# [2.26] Surely Allah is not ashamed to set forth any parable-- (that of) a gnat or any thing above that; then as for those who believe, they know that it is the truth from their Lord, and as for those who disbelieve, they say: What is it that Allah means by this parable: He causes many to err by it and many He leads aright by it! but He does not cause to err by it (any) except the transgressors,
# [2.27] Who break the covenant of Allah after its confirmation and cut asunder what Allah has ordered to be joined, and make mischief in the land; these it is that are the losers.
# [2.28] How do you deny Allah and you were dead and He gave you life? Again He will cause you to die and again bring you to life, then you shall be brought back to Him.
# [2.55] And when you said: O Musa! we will not believe in you until we see Allah manifestly, so the punishment overtook you while you looked on.
# [2.60] And when Musa prayed for drink for his people, We said: Strike the rock with your staff So there gushed from it twelve springs; each tribe knew its drinking place: Eat and drink of the provisions of Allah and do not act corruptly in the land, making mischief.
# [2.61] And when you said: O Musa! we cannot bear with one food, therefore pray Lord on our behalf to bring forth for us out of what the earth grows, of its herbs and its cucumbers and its garlic and its lentils and its onions. He said: Will you exchange that which is better for that which is worse? Enter a city, so you will have what you ask for. And abasement and humiliation were brought down upon them, and they became deserving of Allah's wrath; this was so because they disbelieved in the communications of Allah and killed the prophets unjustly; this was so because they disobeyed and exceeded the limits.
# [2.62] Surely those who believe, and those who are Jews, and the Christians, and the Sabians, whoever believes in Allah and the Last day and does good, they shall have their reward from their Lord, and there is no fear for them, nor shall they grieve.
# [2.64] Then you turned back after that; so were it not for the grace of Allah and His mercy on you, you would certainly have been among the losers.
# [2.67] And when Musa said to his people: Surely Allah commands you that you should sacrifice a cow; they said: Do you ridicule us? He said: I seek the protection of Allah from being one of the ignorant.
# [2.70] They said: Call on your Lord for our sake to make it plain to us what she is, for surely to us the cows are all alike, and if Allah please we shall surely be guided aright.
# [2.72] And when you killed a man, then you disagreed with respect to that, and Allah was to bring forth that which you were going to hide.
# [2.73] So We said: Strike the (dead body) with part of the (Sacrificed cow), thus Allah brings the dead to life, and He shows you His signs so that you may understand.
# [2.74] Then your hearts hardened after that, so that they were like rocks, rather worse in hardness; and surely there are some rocks from which streams burst forth, and surely there are some of them which split asunder so water issues out of them, and surely there are some of them which fall down for fear of Allah, and Allah is not at all heedless of what you do.
# [2.75] Do you then hope that they would believe in you, and a party from among them indeed used to hear the Word of Allah, then altered it after they had understood it, and they know (this).
# [2.76] And when they meet those who believe they say: We believe, and when they are alone one with another they say: Do you talk to them of what Allah has disclosed to you that they may contend with you by this before your Lord? Do you not then understand?
# [2.77] Do they not know that Allah knows what they keep secret and what they make known?
# [2.79] Woe, then, to those who write the book with their hands and then say: This is from Allah, so that they may take for it a small price; therefore woe to them for what their hands have written and woe to them for what they earn.
# [2.80] And they say: Fire shall not touch us but for a few days. Say: Have you received a promise from Allah, then Allah will not fail to perform His promise, or do you speak against Allah what you do not know?
# [2.83] And when We made a covenant with the children of Israel: You shall not serve any but Allah and (you shall do) good to (your) parents, and to the near of kin and to the orphans and the needy, and you shall speak to men good words and keep up prayer and pay the poor-rate. Then you turned back except a few of you and (now too) you turn aside.
# [2.85] Yet you it is who slay your people and turn a party from among you out of their homes, backing each other up against them unlawfully and exceeding the limits; and if they should come to you, as captives you would ransom them-- while their very turning out was unlawful for you. Do you then believe in a part of the Book and disbelieve in the other? What then is the re ward of such among you as do this but disgrace in the life of this world, and on the day of resurrection they shall be sent back to the most grievous chastisement, and Allah is not at all heedless of what you do.
# [2.88] And they say: Our hearts are covered. Nay, Allah has cursed them on account of their unbelief; so little it is that they believe.
# [2.89] And when there came to them a Book from Allah verifying that which they have, and aforetime they used to pray for victory against those who disbelieve, but when there came to them (Prophet) that which they did not recognize, they disbelieved in him; so Allah's curse is on the unbelievers.
# [2.90] Evil is that for which they have sold their souls-- that they should deny what Allah has revealed, out of envy that Allah should send down of His grace on whomsoever of His servants He pleases; so they have made themselves deserving of wrath upon wrath, and there is a disgraceful punishment for the unbelievers.
# [2.91] And when it is said to them, Believe in what Allah has revealed, they say: We believe in that which was revealed to us; and they deny what is besides that, while it is the truth verifying that which they have. Say: Why then did you kill Allah's Prophets before if you were indeed believers?
# [2.94] Say: If the future abode with Allah is specially for you to the exclusion of the people, then invoke death if you are truthful.
# [2.95] And they will never invoke it on account of what their hands have sent before, and Allah knows the unjust.
# [2.96] And you will most certainly find them the greediest of men for life (greedier) than even those who are polytheists; every one of them loves that he should be granted a life of a thousand years, and his being granted a long life will in no way remove him further off from the chastisement, and Allah sees what they
# [2.97] Say: Whoever is the enemy of Jibreel-- for surely he revealed it to your heart by Allah's command, verifying that which is before it and guidance and good news for the believers.
# [2.98] Whoever is the enemy of Allah and His angels and His apostles and Jibreel and Meekaeel, so surely Allah is the enemy of the unbelievers.
# [2.101] And when there came to them an Apostle from Allah verifying that which they have, a party of those who were given the Book threw the Book of Allah behind their backs as if they knew nothing.
# [2.102] And they followed what the Shaitans chanted of sorcery in the reign of Sulaiman, and Sulaiman was not an unbeliever, but the Shaitans disbelieved, they taught men sorcery and that was sent down to the two angels at Babel, Harut and Marut, yet these two taught no man until they had said, "Surely we are only a trial, therefore do not be a disbeliever." Even then men learned from these two, magic by which they might cause a separation between a man and his wife; and they cannot hurt with it any one except with Allah's permission, and they learned what harmed them and did not profit them, and certainly they know that he who bought it should have no share of good in the hereafter and evil was the price for which they sold their souls, had they but known this.
# [2.103] And if they had believed and guarded themselves (against evil), reward from Allah would certainly have been better; had they but known (this).
# [2.105] Those who disbelieve from among the followers of the Book do not like, nor do the polytheists, that the good should be sent down to you from your Lord, and Allah chooses especially whom He pleases for His mercy, and Allah is the Lord of mighty grace.
# [2.106] Whatever communications We abrogate or cause to be forgotten, We bring one better than it or like it. Do you not know that Allah has power over all things?
# [2.107] Do you not know that Allah's is the kingdom of the heavens and the earth, and that besides Allah you have no guardian or helper?

1. [3.12] Say to those who disbelieve: You shall be vanquished, and driven together to hell; and evil is the resting-place.
2. [3.162] Is then he who follows the pleasure of Allah like him who has made himself deserving of displeasure from Allah, and his abode is hell; and it is an evil destination.
3. [3.197] A brief enjoyment! then their abode is hell, and evil is the resting-place.

The Women

1. [4.55] So of them is he who believes in him, and of them is he who turns away from him, and hell is sufficient to burn.
2. [4.93] And whoever kills a believer intentionally, his punishment is hell; he shall abide in it, and Allah will send His wrath on him and curse him and prepare for him a painful chastisement.
3. [4.97] Surely (as for) those whom the angels cause to die while they are unjust to their souls, they shall say: In what state were you? They shall say: We were weak in the earth. They shall say: Was not Allah's earth spacious, so that you should have migrated therein? So these it is whose abode is hell, and it is an evil resort
4. [4.115] And whoever acts hostilely to the Apostle after that guidance has become manifest to him, and follows other than the way of the believers, We will turn him to that to which he has (himself) turned and make him enter hell; and it is an evil resort.
5. [4.121] These are they whose abode is hell, and they shall not find any refuge from it.
6. [4.140] And indeed He has revealed to you in the Book that when you hear Allah's communications disbelieved in and mocked at do not sit with them until they enter into some other discourse; surely then you would be like them; surely Allah will gather together the hypocrites and the unbelievers all in hell.
7. [4.169] Except the path of hell, to abide in it for ever, and this is easy to Allah.
 
Neqamahel said:
# [2.7] Allah has set a seal upon their hearts and upon their hearing and there is a covering over their eyes, and there is a great punishment for them.

Allah is into bondage play.

# [2.8] And there are some people who say: We believe in Allah and the last day; and they are not at all believers.

Those are politicians.

# [2.9] They desire to deceive Allah and those who believe, and they deceive only themselves and they do not perceive.

^^That's the intro to the Allah Rap.

# [2.10] There is a disease in their hearts, so Allah added to their disease and they shall have a painful chastisement because they lied.

Allah makes false followers eat bacon and sausage and ham and Philly Cheese-Steaks until they get high cholesterol.

# [2.15] Allah shall pay them back their mockery, and He leaves them alone in their inordinacy, blindly wandering on.

Allah gouges peoples' eyes out and then makes fun of them.

# [2.17] Their parable is like the parable of one who kindled a fire but when it had illumined all around him, Allah took away their light, and left them in utter darkness-- they do not see.

Allah is a pyro thief.

# [2.19] Or like abundant rain from the cloud in which is utter darkness and thunder and lightning; they put their fingers into their ears because of the thunder peal, for fear of death, and Allah encompasses the unbelievers.

Allah sits on people during thunderstorms.

# [2.20] The lightning almost takes away their sight; whenever it shines on them they walk in it, and when it becomes dark to them they stand still; and if Allah had pleased He would certainly have taken away their hearing and their sight; surely Allah has power over all things.

Muslims can walk as fast as Superman, but only during thunderstorms, and only 'cause Allah thinks it's cool to watch.

# [2.22] Who made the earth a resting place for you and the heaven a canopy and (Who) sends down rain from the cloud then brings forth with it subsistence for you of the fruits; therefore do not set up rivals to Allah while you know.

Allah makes it rain, so don't build gods out of parts you got at Radio Shack.

# [2.23] And if you are in doubt as to that which We have revealed to Our servant, then produce a chapter like it and call on your witnesses besides Allah if you are truthful.

If you think we made all this shit up, make up your own shit.

# [2.26] Surely Allah is not ashamed to set forth any parable-- (that of) a gnat or any thing above that; then as for those who believe, they know that it is the truth from their Lord, and as for those who disbelieve, they say: What is it that Allah means by this parable: He causes many to err by it and many He leads aright by it! but He does not cause to err by it (any) except the transgressors,

Allah doesn't care if you think he made this shit up, especially not the shit he makes up about bugs, 'cause all the dumbasses who believe his, well... they believe him. And everybody else is like, "WTF?!"

# [2.27] Who break the covenant of Allah after its confirmation and cut asunder what Allah has ordered to be joined, and make mischief in the land; these it is that are the losers.

Allah doesn't like people who break his stuff.

# [2.28] How do you deny Allah and you were dead and He gave you life? Again He will cause you to die and again bring you to life, then you shall be brought back to Him.

Hey, you came back from the dead! And Allah's gonna make you come back from the dead again... well... you know... after you die, and stuff.

# [2.55] And when you said: O Musa! we will not believe in you until we see Allah manifestly, so the punishment overtook you while you looked on.

You said you didn't believe in Allah, that's why we took you over our knees and gave you spankings. Plus, you know, we're into that kind of thing.

# [2.60] And when Musa prayed for drink for his people, We said: Strike the rock with your staff So there gushed from it twelve springs; each tribe knew its drinking place: Eat and drink of the provisions of Allah and do not act corruptly in the land, making mischief.

Dude wanted some water, we told him to go smack a rock with a stick! LOLSY!!!1

# [2.61] And when you said: O Musa! we cannot bear with one food, therefore pray Lord on our behalf to bring forth for us out of what the earth grows, of its herbs and its cucumbers and its garlic and its lentils and its onions. He said: Will you exchange that which is better for that which is worse? Enter a city, so you will have what you ask for. And abasement and humiliation were brought down upon them, and they became deserving of Allah's wrath; this was so because they disbelieved in the communications of Allah and killed the prophets unjustly; this was so because they disobeyed and exceeded the limits.

And then they were like -- Hey, man! We could really go for a salad bar! But Allah was like, "Dude, that sucks! Go to the store!" And then he got really pissed off 'cause they were speeding.

# [2.62] Surely those who believe, and those who are Jews, and the Christians, and the Sabians, whoever believes in Allah and the Last day and does good, they shall have their reward from their Lord, and there is no fear for them, nor shall they grieve.

Everybody's cool. It's all good.

# [2.64] Then you turned back after that; so were it not for the grace of Allah and His mercy on you, you would certainly have been among the losers.

But then you guys, like, changed your minds. Good thing Allah's a mellow dude, even though you guys are, like, total losers.

# [2.67] And when Musa said to his people: Surely Allah commands you that you should sacrifice a cow; they said: Do you ridicule us? He said: I seek the protection of Allah from being one of the ignorant.

And then dude said, "Go kill a cow!" And they were like, "WTFLOL!!!1~" So he was like, "Quit bein' stupid! :rwmad:"

# [2.70] They said: Call on your Lord for our sake to make it plain to us what she is, for surely to us the cows are all alike, and if Allah please we shall surely be guided aright.

So then they were like, "Well tell fucker to show us which cow he wants!"

# [2.72] And when you killed a man, then you disagreed with respect to that, and Allah was to bring forth that which you were going to hide.

Don't kill people, or Allah will show everybody your shit.

# [2.73] So We said: Strike the (dead body) with part of the (Sacrificed cow), thus Allah brings the dead to life, and He shows you His signs so that you may understand.

So then we were all like, "Hey, smack the dead dude with your cheeseburger!"

# [2.74] Then your hearts hardened after that, so that they were like rocks, rather worse in hardness; and surely there are some rocks from which streams burst forth, and surely there are some of them which split asunder so water issues out of them, and surely there are some of them which fall down for fear of Allah, and Allah is not at all heedless of what you do.

Then everybody was all pissed off -- but, you know, sometimes water comes out of rocks and sometimes the rocks get scared of Allah, 'cause he spies on you and shit.

# [2.75] Do you then hope that they would believe in you, and a party from among them indeed used to hear the Word of Allah, then altered it after they had understood it, and they know (this).

So I found out at this party one time that this Allah shit is all pretty much bogus.

# [2.76] And when they meet those who believe they say: We believe, and when they are alone one with another they say: Do you talk to them of what Allah has disclosed to you that they may contend with you by this before your Lord? Do you not then understand?

And some people are all like, "Yeah, it's cool, bro!" But then they get together in private and they're like, "Dude, WTF?!"

# [2.77] Do they not know that Allah knows what they keep secret and what they make known?

Dude, they totally don't know Allah's eavesdropping and shit.

# [2.79] Woe, then, to those who write the book with their hands and then say: This is from Allah, so that they may take for it a small price; therefore woe to them for what their hands have written and woe to them for what they earn.

So, like, everybody who writes shit about Allah is lying, and they totally suck.

# [2.80] And they say: Fire shall not touch us but for a few days. Say: Have you received a promise from Allah, then Allah will not fail to perform His promise, or do you speak against Allah what you do not know?

But they're all like, "Man, we're golden!" But dude, totally ask 'em if they really heard that from Allah or if they're just talkin' shit, dude.

Jesus, what a long-winded fucker this guy is. I'm done with this post. :rwmad:
 
Part 2!

# [2.83] And when We made a covenant with the children of Israel: You shall not serve any but Allah and (you shall do) good to (your) parents, and to the near of kin and to the orphans and the needy, and you shall speak to men good words and keep up prayer and pay the poor-rate. Then you turned back except a few of you and (now too) you turn aside.

So then we told the Jews, "Okay, don't go hittin' up Radio Shack for Gods and stuff! Be nice to your peeps, yo, and say nice shit to people, and kick down change to the homebums." But, like, you totally didn't do any of that shit.

# [2.85] Yet you it is who slay your people and turn a party from among you out of their homes, backing each other up against them unlawfully and exceeding the limits; and if they should come to you, as captives you would ransom them-- while their very turning out was unlawful for you. Do you then believe in a part of the Book and disbelieve in the other? What then is the re ward of such among you as do this but disgrace in the life of this world, and on the day of resurrection they shall be sent back to the most grievous chastisement, and Allah is not at all heedless of what you do.

See, you losers are the ones bein' a total buzzkill, like shakin' people down, and dry-humpin' 'em and then speeding and shit. Totally.

# [2.88] And they say: Our hearts are covered. Nay, Allah has cursed them on account of their unbelief; so little it is that they believe.

So, like, they don't believe in Allah -- so Allah said "No, fuck you!" Not that, you know, not that they believe he said that.

# [2.89] And when there came to them a Book from Allah verifying that which they have, and aforetime they used to pray for victory against those who disbelieve, but when there came to them (Prophet) that which they did not recognize, they disbelieved in him; so Allah's curse is on the unbelievers.

So check it, Allah sends 'em this book for the very first time that they already had. So then this dude shows up, and nobody knows him, and he's totally That Guy, and they were like, "Dude! STFU!" and Allah got all pissed off.

# [2.90] Evil is that for which they have sold their souls-- that they should deny what Allah has revealed, out of envy that Allah should send down of His grace on whomsoever of His servants He pleases; so they have made themselves deserving of wrath upon wrath, and there is a disgraceful punishment for the unbelievers.

These guys are so on Allah's shit list. But that's what happens, 'cause when you get all froggy with Allah's peeps, man, he'll lay some really crappy punishment on you. Like making you look at pictures of Ricki Lake, and shit.

# [2.91] And when it is said to them, Believe in what Allah has revealed, they say: We believe in that which was revealed to us; and they deny what is besides that, while it is the truth verifying that which they have. Say: Why then did you kill Allah's Prophets before if you were indeed believers?

But, like, if you ask 'em about it, they're all, "Yeah, we're cool with Allah." So fuckin' ask 'em, "Well, WTF?! How come you wacked his agent, then?!"

# [2.94] Say: If the future abode with Allah is specially for you to the exclusion of the people, then invoke death if you are truthful.

And then be like, "Well, dude, if Allah's lettin' you kick it at his crib, bust out some fuckin' Bedouin voodoo, yo!"

# [2.95] And they will never invoke it on account of what their hands have sent before, and Allah knows the unjust.

But they totally can't, 'cause they're fulla shit, man.

# [2.96] And you will most certainly find them the greediest of men for life (greedier) than even those who are polytheists; every one of them loves that he should be granted a life of a thousand years, and his being granted a long life will in no way remove him further off from the chastisement, and Allah sees what they

Dude, they'll eat all your fuckin' cereal, bro, and Mikey won't get shit.

# [2.97] Say: Whoever is the enemy of Jibreel-- for surely he revealed it to your heart by Allah's command, verifying that which is before it and guidance and good news for the believers.[/quote]

So be like, "Yo, who gots beef with my homie Jibbery... jibber... WTF?! I forgot how motherfucker's name is pronounced. Next one.

# [2.98] Whoever is the enemy of Allah and His angels and His apostles and Jibreel and Meekaeel, so surely Allah is the enemy of the unbelievers.

Oh, you got beef with Allah? Mothafucka, Allah gots beef with you!

# [2.101] And when there came to them an Apostle from Allah verifying that which they have, a party of those who were given the Book threw the Book of Allah behind their backs as if they knew nothing.

So then Allah sent his dude down to get the party started, but everybody was all like, "Man, we don't know shit, man..."

# [2.102] And they followed what the Shaitans chanted of sorcery in the reign of Sulaiman, and Sulaiman was not an unbeliever, but the Shaitans disbelieved, they taught men sorcery and that was sent down to the two angels at Babel, Harut and Marut, yet these two taught no man until they had said, "Surely we are only a trial, therefore do not be a disbeliever." Even then men learned from these two, magic by which they might cause a separation between a man and his wife; and they cannot hurt with it any one except with Allah's permission, and they learned what harmed them and did not profit them, and certainly they know that he who bought it should have no share of good in the hereafter and evil was the price for which they sold their souls, had they but known this.

Yeah... okay, whatever.

# [2.103] And if they had believed and guarded themselves (against evil), reward from Allah would certainly have been better; had they but known (this).

Allah would'a got 'em some Happy Meals if they just would'a listened.

# [2.105] Those who disbelieve from among the followers of the Book do not like, nor do the polytheists, that the good should be sent down to you from your Lord, and Allah chooses especially whom He pleases for His mercy, and Allah is the Lord of mighty grace.

Allah kinda plays favorites sometimes. Plus, all these motherfuckers over here don't want no favors from him anyway.

# [2.106] Whatever communications We abrogate or cause to be forgotten, We bring one better than it or like it. Do you not know that Allah has power over all things?

Dude, if your phone rings and it's Allah, make him leave a message. That way, he'll call back and give you a bunch of cool shit. Maybe even a Walkman.

# [2.107] Do you not know that Allah's is the kingdom of the heavens and the earth, and that besides Allah you have no guardian or helper?

Dude, Allah's totally in the real estate business. Oh, and nobody else gives a crap about you.

The Women

1. [4.55] So of them is he who believes in him, and of them is he who turns away from him, and hell is sufficient to burn.

Um...

2. [4.93] And whoever kills a believer intentionally, his punishment is hell; he shall abide in it, and Allah will send His wrath on him and curse him and prepare for him a painful chastisement.

Anybody wastes one of Allah's posse is gonna sit in a big stinky puddle of hell, and Allah will yell at the motherfucker and take off his belt and shit.

3. [4.97] Surely (as for) those whom the angels cause to die while they are unjust to their souls, they shall say: In what state were you? They shall say: We were weak in the earth. They shall say: Was not Allah's earth spacious, so that you should have migrated therein? So these it is whose abode is hell, and it is an evil resort

So then the angels will be like, "Yo, whassup!" And the dead peeps will be all like, "Man, we SUCKED!" And the angels will be like, "What, the whole earth wasn't big enough for you? Why didn't you fuckin' go somewhere? And those motherfuckers is gonna hafta go live in Hell, which is kind of like a really bad version of the Hilton.
 
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