a failed suicide attempt: the answer to all life's problems?

[CaptainWacky]

sometimes people try to kill themselves then wake up in the hospital and, rather than try again, they decide they've been given a "second chance" and begin enjoying life! I've no idea how this happens, but there is one way to find out......................

 

[Eggs Mayonnaise]

Unless you get arrested for attempting suicide. Then it sucks for a while.

 

[Eggs Mayonnaise]

 

[CaptainWacky]

Do they actually "arrest" people for attempting suicide? Section them, sure, but jailing someone who's already suicidal I CAN'T SEE IT.

 

[Fuddlemiff]

They do in some places. It's always on those lists of silly laws that people email.

 

[The Dork Lord]

THEY DESERVE THE DEATH PENALTY!

 

[Henoch]

if Wacky attempted suicide and failed i could later start a thread entitled...

..."Remember when Wacky attemted suicide & failed??"

or, if Wacky attempted suicide & succeeded i could later start a thread entitled...

..."Remember when Wacky attemted suicide & succeeded??"

Either way i still have thread material.

 

[Fuddlemiff]

Or

"Remember when Wacky attempted attempted suicide but succeeded"

 

[The Dork Lord]

If Wacky actually killed himself I would find his grave and shit on it.

That's the same promise I make to all of my friends.

 

[Dr Dave]

charming...

 

[CaptainWacky]

It's unmarked.

 

[Cassie]

We'd be able to find it by the SPAM tree that sprouts on top of it. THEN I'D GO THERE TO CRY AND SPAM.

 

[Dr Dave]

Would you dress in black and write crappy poetry?

 

[Cassie]

Yes spammy poetry

Here lies Wacky
He was cracky
I miss his axe

 

[CaptainWacky]

Here lies Cassie,
She's not dead,
She just decided to sleep,
But not in bed,
On top of MY GRAVE,
Oh how brave,
PILLZ LOL

 

[The Dork Lord]

Cassie and I shouldn't go at the same time

I don't want the smell to upset her

 

[Cassie]

The smell of pickles?

 

[Dr Dave]

More like the smell of rotten pickles.

 

[The Dork Lord]

The smell of rotten pickle-poop fertilizing the flowers!

 

[CaptainWacky]

Surely a failed failed suicide attempt would just be suicide?