StringTheorist
My previous title sucked.
Once there was a cattle called Doncho. He was very good and lovely. However, everyone called him "YOU FILTHY CATTLE!!!", because he was a cattle, and this made him very sad. Once, the giraffe saw him cry and told him that he should seek an advice from the wise eagle. He went there and the wise eagle told him that every time when the cattle goes home, he should touch the doorknob seven times, clean the carpet next to the door, step in odd number of times on every big square on the carpet's drawings, and always clean the dust on the TV. Doncho did so, and he noticed that those rituals became habits, and if he doesn't do them, he gets frustrated until he does them. Also, he started correcting the people's grammar mistakes. After the week passed, he went back to the wise eagle. Then the eagle said "MUHAHA! Now you have Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder!", then he tore his eagle skin, the wolf came from the inside, and he ate the cattle. But at the well, the Riding Hood and the hunter met him, killed the wolf and pulled out Doncho. Apparently they killed the wrong wolf, but Doncho took advantage of this and he lived as a grandpa. This way nobody knew he was a cattle, and nobody called him "YOU FILTHY CATTLE!!!", plus he had a granddaughter who fed him with delicious cakes and gingerbread. And he lived happily for ever after.
