Ask God/Allah/Universal Intelligence Anything.

[Blindgroping]

As a representative of this power, I am authorized to answer your queries.

 

[FBI parte due]

Why does Blindgroping/Josh suck so much?

I know it's not on purpose, no matter how hard he tries to convince himself of that.

 

[Donovan]

Once I screamed into the night air, "Why me Lord, why me!?"

Out of nowhere a deep booming voice said, "I don't know, Donovan, there's just something about you really pisses me off."

I do not question God any more...

 

[eloisel]

I called out to God once.
The message was "Your call is important to us. Please hold and the next available representative will be with you. Your position in the que is 9,876,854,953,218."

 

[Dirk Funk]

Do you represent Ceiling Cat as well?

 

[ThatSunrise]

This reminds me of the Colbert Christmas Special, with Feist as the please hold angel.

 

[Eggs Mayonnaise]

Who died and made you God?

 

[Blindgroping]

Why does Blindgroping suck so much?

I know it's not on purpose, no matter how hard he tries to convince himself of that.

Free will.
Just as you have that same free will to suck even more.

 

[Blindgroping]

Once I screamed into the night air, "Why me Lord, why me!?"

Out of nowhere a deep booming voice said, "I don't know, Donovan, there's just something about you really pisses me off."

I do not question God any more...

Good boy.

 

[Blindgroping]

I called out to God once.
The message was "Your call is important to us. Please hold and the next available representative will be with you. Your position in the que is 9,876,854,953,218."

"Ha! I love that joke!"

 

[Blindgroping]

Do you represent Ceiling Cat as well?

Ceiling Cat is just another aspect.
Yes.

 

[Blindgroping]

Who died and made you God?

"Why, the previous God.
Who else?"

 

[Gagh]

WHY, GOD, WHY?

 

[Blindgroping]

WHY, GOD, WHY?

"because I said so.

And it was funneh."

 

[eloisel]

"Ha! I love that joke!"

It was no joke. It was the message I received. I'm still holding.

 

[Blindgroping]

"he" must be waiting to the next suicide person to take your call.

Or, just trade with the Head Shrinker for the lower number.

 

[parkmice]

how can I go on like this?

 

[eloisel]

how can I go on like this?

You can't. Now what are you going to do?

 

[Blindgroping]

how can I go on like this?

"are you placing limitations on Me?"

 

[eloisel]

A god confined within parameters.