Bonsai Kitten

[Hissing_Kittens]

Dedicated to preserving the long lost art of body modification in housepets.

http://www.shorty.com/bonsaikitten/index.html

 

[Gagh]

Beyond cruel.

 

[Virginia]

and a hoax.

www.snopes.com

 

[Gagh]

Still cruel.

 

[Tyrant]

• 1. Air. This ought to go without saying, but you'd be surprised how many amateurs forget this detail and wind up with a cold, hard kitty in the morning! If the containment vessel is sealed, you must drill airholes prior to kitten insertion. A diamond drill is recommended for glass vessels.
  
• 2. Food & Water. Especially if the kitten's head is being shaped (one of the most versatile aspects of the Bonsai Kitten), it will not be able to eat or drink normally. The most common solution is another hole in the container with a feeding tube to the kitten's mouth, where a liquid food slurry can provide both nutrient and hydration requirements.
  
• 3. Waste Removal. Left to its own devices, the kitten would quickly fill its vessel with its own urine and feces, leading to certain sickness and death, not to mention the inevitably unpleasant appearance and odor. The best solution is to seal the kitten's anus with Super Glue prior to insertion, and then insert a waste tube through a third whole in the vessel. As the kitten's body is still developing, a natural rectal diverticulum will soon form around the tube, which can be drained in any convenient fashion. It's just like a kitty colostomy bag!

http://www.shorty.com/bonsaikitten/bkmethod.html

 

[Kerb Crawler]

Oh, cruelty to animals hoaxes and pranks! How too much the funny it is! It hurts, it does. I think I've shit myself out of spiteful glee and mischief.