Coin a new phrase for "taking a crap"

[Cygnus]

Excuse me, I need to go dispense a Pez.

Or, excuse me I need to go bring the mountain to Mohammad.

 

[Sendell]

I've got a Boobah Jamboree coming on.

 

[The Question]

Damn, the Keeblers are on speed, 'scuse me a minute.

 

[whisky]

I'm off to fill the superbowl.

 

[YeahSoWhat]

Excuse me, I have to go squeeze out some cheese Whiz.
Excuse me, my milk duds are calling.

 

[Morrhigan]

My grandfather used to say, "I've gotta go to the Batcave!"

 

[Caitriona]

I had a lover, who used to just say he "had to take a sit down!" Took me forever to figure out what he meant.

 

[Kyehlar]

Reminds me of something George Carlin said. Whenever you 'take a shit', you're not really taking it, are you? If anything, you're 'leaving a shit'. It'd be rather nasty, if we actually 'took a shit'.

Wouldn't it?

 

[Cygnus]

I had a lover, who used to just say he "had to take a sit down!" Took me forever to figure out what he meant.

Had to take a sit down sounds very British. God save the queen!

 

[Cloudy]

LOL - in Britain, they say 'I'm going to take a shower', but 'I'm going to take a shit' is met with looks of disgust

 

[jack]

Im going to pinch a loaf.

 

[The Question]

I'm gonna shake a tit.

 

[jack]

I'm going to make my daily Offering to the Porcelain Goddess.

 

[Donovan]

When I lived in LA we used to say "I'm off to the Brown Derby," or "I gotta recycle some Taco Bell," and of course "turtling " or "prairie dogging" meant you had to go real bad.

"Copping a squat" is pretty universal, though. I've heard that one everywhere.

 

[jack]

What's really odd is when you pinch an enormous log, one that takes forever to squeeze out, one you know is a footlong or more, and then when you look there's nothing there

 

[Mandi]

EWWWWWWWWWWW!

 

[Big Dick McGee]

I'm taking the Metamucil express down the Hershey highway!

 

[whisky]

What's really odd is when you pinch an enormous log, one that takes forever to squeeze out, one you know is a footlong or more, and then when you look there's nothing there

Craps of that size often go round the bend, leaving you with little evidence.

I find the really massive craps often require little or no wiping either, whereas the little pebbles leave you wiping for three times the length of time you spent crapping.

 

[YeahSoWhat]

Time to deposit some Hershey Kisses in the jar

 

[lady_elena_wf]

Rescueing the chocolate hostages.

or

Dropping the kids off at the pool.