CaptainWacky
I want to smell dark matter
"HELLO MY NAME IS FREDDY NOSE AND I SHOUT A LOT, WILL YOU BE MY GIRLFRIEND?" Freddy Nose asked the pretty girl with no legs.
"No, Freddy," she said. "You know I'm a lesbian."
"How can you be a lesbian with no legs!?" he asked, reasonably.
"My parnter has four legs," she said.
"IS SHE A COW!?" was, Freddy thought, the obvious question.
"No," she said, starting to wheel herself away. Freddy followed.
"Aww come on, I'm fucking crazy, I need someone to talk to. Don't leave me. Please."
She sighed. His sad eyes. "Fine, what do you want to talk about?" she asked.
"Do you think they'll let me go home to live with my parents soon?" he asked.
"Well, you're still crazy," she said. "So probably not."
"Not fair! I'm crazy but not in a burn the house down way! I wouldn't do that again!"
"It would be hard to burn down the same house twice."
"HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHA," he laughed and resisted the urge to squeeze her boobs.
"Thanks for not squeezing my boobs," she said. It had been in issue between them before. He felt that squeezing boobs was the perfect way to puncuate laughter.
"No problem!" he said. "So, when will they let you out? Not until your legs regrow, I would imagine!"
"I'm not in here because I have no legs," she said, annoyed. He kept saying that. She was nearly starting to believe it. "I cut myself, remember?"
"You cut your stumps!" he laughed.
"Yes, Freddy, I cut my stumps," she said.
"You've been in group home for six fucking weeks! It's not like you even tried to kill yourself."
"So, what, you're saying that my parents don't want me back and they've bribed the nurses to keep me here?"
"Yes," he said, flatly.
"They think I killed the cat too," she said. "I didn't! It jumped onto the fire."
"Sucks that nobody believes you! But I do, Veronica. I believe in you. Your heart, you good heart. Your legs, wherever they are, I'm sure they were good too."
"My name isn't Veronica."
"My name isn't Freddyd Nose!"
"Yes it is."
"Oh, right. What a stupid name. No wonder I'm crazy!"
"No, Freddy," she said. "You know I'm a lesbian."
"How can you be a lesbian with no legs!?" he asked, reasonably.
"My parnter has four legs," she said.
"IS SHE A COW!?" was, Freddy thought, the obvious question.
"No," she said, starting to wheel herself away. Freddy followed.
"Aww come on, I'm fucking crazy, I need someone to talk to. Don't leave me. Please."
She sighed. His sad eyes. "Fine, what do you want to talk about?" she asked.
"Do you think they'll let me go home to live with my parents soon?" he asked.
"Well, you're still crazy," she said. "So probably not."
"Not fair! I'm crazy but not in a burn the house down way! I wouldn't do that again!"
"It would be hard to burn down the same house twice."
"HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHA," he laughed and resisted the urge to squeeze her boobs.
"Thanks for not squeezing my boobs," she said. It had been in issue between them before. He felt that squeezing boobs was the perfect way to puncuate laughter.
"No problem!" he said. "So, when will they let you out? Not until your legs regrow, I would imagine!"
"I'm not in here because I have no legs," she said, annoyed. He kept saying that. She was nearly starting to believe it. "I cut myself, remember?"
"You cut your stumps!" he laughed.
"Yes, Freddy, I cut my stumps," she said.
"You've been in group home for six fucking weeks! It's not like you even tried to kill yourself."
"So, what, you're saying that my parents don't want me back and they've bribed the nurses to keep me here?"
"Yes," he said, flatly.
"They think I killed the cat too," she said. "I didn't! It jumped onto the fire."
"Sucks that nobody believes you! But I do, Veronica. I believe in you. Your heart, you good heart. Your legs, wherever they are, I'm sure they were good too."
"My name isn't Veronica."
"My name isn't Freddyd Nose!"
"Yes it is."
"Oh, right. What a stupid name. No wonder I'm crazy!"
