Halloween Has Been Cancelled.

[Squirtle The Turtle]

Official Announcement:​

As the Grand General of the Lord's Holy Armies of Righteousness, Halloween will no longer be practiced in America. This is a Pagan holiday, and not in keeping with Christianity.
Anyone seen dressed in costumes will be arrested and anyone in demonic costumes will be shot dead. We thank you for obeying the lord's commands on this. Please do not attempt to get around this command.

Authorized by the Lord Jesus Christ and Issued by Grand General Squirtle of the Lord's Holy Armies of Righteousness.​

 

[Loktar]

I'm dressed in drag as a prostitute. Come and get me, you furfag piece of shit. I dare you.

 

[Squirtle The Turtle]

I'm dressed in drag as a prostitute. Come and get me, you furfag piece of shit. I dare you.

We will examine you and if you are indeed hetrosexual, we will allow you to live as long as you wear a pink cross on your left lapel.

 

[Sarek]

Official Announcement:

As the Grand General of the Lord's Holy Armies of Righteousness, Halloween will no longer be practiced in America. This is a Pagan holiday, and not in keeping with Christianity.
Anyone seen dressed in costumes will be arrested and anyone in demonic costumes will be shot dead. We thank you for obeying the lord's commands on this. Please do not attempt to get around this command.

I'm taking my kids out dressed as Satan. And I GUARANTEE I'm a better shot than you are.

 

[Squirtle The Turtle]

I'm taking my kids out dressed as Satan. And I GUARANTEE I'm a better shot than you are.

Sarek, if you do so we will be forced to shoot you with heavy machine guns. Please respect the commands of the Lord's Holy Armies of Righteousness and do not imperil your children.

 

[Loktar]

We will examine you and if you are indeed hetrosexual, we will allow you to live as long as you wear a pink cross on your left lapel.

I am heterosexual. Your Dad wrote me a note stating this after I fucked him up the ass.

 

[Sarek]

Sarek, if you do so we will be forced to shoot you with heavy machine guns. Please respect the commands of the Lord's Holy Armies of Righteousness and do not imperil your children.

I'd be willing to bet my kids could kick the shit out of your army.

 

[eloisel]

STT, you went too far when you threatened Halloween. I went over your head and spoke to God myself. Your authority in the matter of Halloween has been revoked.

 

[Yub]

Squirtle you retarded bag of monkey vomit I zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

 

[MamaKitty]

Blah, I refuse to believe that Halloween has been canceled!
Beside, I just got my fairy costume finished! There are parties to be had and stuff to be done! Sorry, canceling Halloween can not be done!

 

[jack]