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How do muppets propagate their species with so few females?

CaptainWacky

I want to smell dark matter
Quick, name a female muppet other than Ms. Piggy. Okay, you probably said "Janice from the Electric Mayhem" as you have at least a beginner level muppet knowledge. But who's the first most famous female muppet? It's, uhh, that chicken Gonzo shags. Yeah, that's not many female muppets!

So where are all the boy muppets who entertain us coming from? I don't remember any stories about Piggy, Janice or that chicken Gonzo fucks being pregnant. The only conclusion we can reach here is that there are a lot more female muppets - probably an equal number to the entertaining male muppets - and we just don't get to see them. My theory is that they are kept at home as broodmares, with no rights of their own. Their only purpose is to produce little baby muppets to star in muppet-related tv shows and films. Maybe their literally kept chained up in the kitchen or bedroom. I shudder to think about how the male muppets treat them when they get home.

Perhaps a future Muppet story will see Piggy, Janice and that chicken Gonzo fucks attempt to liberate their muppet sisters and violently murder Kermit, Fozzie and the rest of them. Somehow I doubt. The grim reality, I fear, is that Piggy, Janice, and that chicken Gonzo fucks are sellouts who abandoned their muppet sisters to their fate to pursue lives of fame. Muppet babies will continue to be pumped out in the breeding factory. And muppet emancipation will remain a dream to the womb-bearers.
 
In the Olden Dayes of Thee Internet, there was a story that explained the Smurfs, where Smurfette is the only female. It was almost on par with the Saga of the Bloodninja. But I can't find it anywhere now. :(
 
Muppets are actually hatched, from giant eggs laid by Big Bird.

Big Bird has been exploited in this manner since 1975. They receive no royalties, or even decent healthcare for all their troubles.

The good news is, the WGA were able to have Big Bird classified as a Writer since they gave birth to so many characters, so Big Bird is part of the current strike. FIGHT THE POWER YOU LARGE YELLOW MOTHER OF EARTH.

(When I saw the title I assumed this was a thread bump from the old days lol -- YOU STILL GOT IT BONC)
 
In the Olden Dayes of Thee Internet, there was a story that explained the Smurfs, where Smurfette is the only female. It was almost on par with the Saga of the Bloodninja. But I can't find it anywhere now. :(
In the comics, Smurfette was created by Gargamel as part of a plot to breed jealousy and discord among the little blue gnomes. The recipe for a Smurfette is as follows: “Sugar and spice but nothing nice; a dram of crocodile tears; peck of bird brain; the tip of an adder’s tongue; half a pack of lies, white, of course; the slyness of a cat; the vanity of a peacock; the chatter of a magpie; the guile of a vixen and the disposition of a shrew; and of course the hardest stone for her heart.”

The name Gargamel comes from a work by 16th-century French writer François Rabelais. In the bawdy satire “The Life of Gargantua and of Pantagruel,” a collection of stories detailing the chivalric exploits of a giant and his son, Gargamelle was Gargantua’s mother.

Gargamel’s pet cat is named Azrael after the Archangel of Death found in Islam and Hebrew lore.

A 1959 Smurfs story called “The Black Smurfs” — changed to “The Purple Smurfs” in the U.S. — is sometimes cited as one of the earliest examples of zombie fiction, according to whatculture.com. In it, a Smurf is stung by a black fly, causing him to become a brain-dead fiend that goes around biting other Smurfs and spreading the disease. It was a full nine years before George Romero thought to do the same thing with “Night of the Living Dead.”

“The Black Smurfs” is also the only time a Smurf is seen without a hat. They’re bald underneath.

In the real world, the word “smurf” can mean one of several things, including a person who launders money.
 


MISS NANNY IS A MONSTER!


Remember in the original Muppet Babies Scooter had a twin sister named Skeeter. https://disney.fandom.com/wiki/Skeeter

We NEVER SEE HER as an adult. Meaning she either died, or, more likely, Scooter has her tied up at home. How much did Nanny know about this?



Why else replace her with a tweety bird character in the reboot? They don't want us to remember...

And who THE FUCK are these two hotties?



FInd them. Free them.
 
Muppets are actually hatched, from giant eggs laid by Big Bird.

Big Bird has been exploited in this manner since 1975. They receive no royalties, or even decent healthcare for all their troubles.

The good news is, the WGA were able to have Big Bird classified as a Writer since they gave birth to so many characters, so Big Bird is part of the current strike. FIGHT THE POWER YOU LARGE YELLOW MOTHER OF EARTH.

(When I saw the title I assumed this was the thread bump from the old days lol -- YOU STILL GOT IT BONC)

OMG I was just about to say, "Big bird was a chick"
 
In the comics, Smurfette was created by Gargamel as part of a plot to breed jealousy and discord among the little blue gnomes. The recipe for a Smurfette is as follows: “Sugar and spice but nothing nice; a dram of crocodile tears; peck of bird brain; the tip of an adder’s tongue; half a pack of lies, white, of course; the slyness of a cat; the vanity of a peacock; the chatter of a magpie; the guile of a vixen and the disposition of a shrew; and of course the hardest stone for her heart.”

The name Gargamel comes from a work by 16th-century French writer François Rabelais. In the bawdy satire “The Life of Gargantua and of Pantagruel,” a collection of stories detailing the chivalric exploits of a giant and his son, Gargamelle was Gargantua’s mother.

Gargamel’s pet cat is named Azrael after the Archangel of Death found in Islam and Hebrew lore.

A 1959 Smurfs story called “The Black Smurfs” — changed to “The Purple Smurfs” in the U.S. — is sometimes cited as one of the earliest examples of zombie fiction, according to whatculture.com. In it, a Smurf is stung by a black fly, causing him to become a brain-dead fiend that goes around biting other Smurfs and spreading the disease. It was a full nine years before George Romero thought to do the same thing with “Night of the Living Dead.”

“The Black Smurfs” is also the only time a Smurf is seen without a hat. They’re bald underneath.

In the real world, the word “smurf” can mean one of several things, including a person who launders money.
I still have a book called "The Fake Smurf" where Gargamel turns himself into a Smurf minus the tail. Makes a fake Smurf tail by painting a walnut blue and gluing it to his ass. Falls into the river while blowing up a Smurf bridge, loses his fake tail. The Smurfs find his fake tail, find him out. Papa Smurf turns him back into Gargamel but he is still Smurf size. He flees Smurf village in shame.
 
But do gender and reproduction in the Muppetverse conform to human ideas? Or do they have their own origin story?

I know that I definitely become more animated once someone shoves their hand up my ass, but I don't need it to live...
 
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