I feel like I haven't made enough Christmas-themed spam threads

[CaptainWacky]

afjsdjkllkjas fMINCE PIESldasl gaklgal g CRACKErs sakg ag agkasg DVDsdgj askg ag asg s g PLsgl las ga g dg ag HITLER dsgljg ALLISON MACK sagldsakg ag ag aljga gl KILL YOURSELF AT NEW YEAR dslajgakgasg ag ag TIME SLIPPING BY dasjlg sag NO END BUT DEATH dljsajglag kg MADNESS IS COMFORTING skggj salgks ad DRUGSds agk agk ag aslg ag a g a sg sa gsa gsa;glasfafksajkasg;a sgjsa l sHARRP OTTY lgk ag a LOGJSL agjk SL THE MURDER GANG sjkg EAT FOOD sa ds JESUS sa gldjs gd SANTA d algka a g SUEPRMAN lsgk askg BATMNA alsjg gkakj a salgkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk ks g KILL KILL DIE DIE EVERYBODY DIE BOYD HOYLAND RICKY GERVAIS JEWS PAUL MERTON sljgkag sgagas gfuckfuckfcukfcuk SO HERE IT IS MERRY CHRISTMAS sf aaaaag sg aaa MMmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm MINCE lsag a

 

[Mentalist]

Joggy the friendly apple.

 

[CaptainWacky]

joggy was a friendly apple to all the other fruits int eh village until one day ollie the oranage stole his boke so he shot him the end

 

[Mentalist]

It's the story of Jesus