I'm probably going to Hell...

[Volpone]

...I have thoughts that are just...inappropriate. Be warned. Read no further if you don't want to hear crass, obscene, possibly racist things.

So. Thing about assembly line work is, it gives you a lot of time to think. Once you get in the rhythm of shooting a screw and fitting a heating element every 16 seconds for 8 hours, you have time to think; and time for your mind to wander. So I thought about the lovely young thing across from me and a few feet over who looked like a buff fitness instructor Zendaya in skintight leggings and an only slightly looser longsleeve T, with a little bun poking out the back of her baseball cap--and how nice it would be to lovingly lick the back of her exposed neck--while lovingly rearranging her guts with my majestic penis.

 

[The Question]

Yep. You're going to hell, all right. Not for the thought, which is a completely normal and healthy thought.

Nope. You're going to hell for giving in to some kind of pansy-ass impulse to disclaim that thought before presenting it. That was seriously puss of you, especially for this audience.

 

[jack]

My penis is so majestic that even though I lost both legs below the knee in Vietnam I can drive a stick shift with it while playng mailbox baseball simultaneously.

 

[Loktar]

My penis is a grower not a show-er, but I'd certainly show her....my penis.