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In the blue corner...

whisky

whisky

Boobie inspector
JADE
Home: Essex
Age: 25
Height: 5’ 6”
Weight: Lost two stone thanks to her lucrative diet video… but it turned out she’d had liposuction.
Bust: Boob job took her from a 36C to a 36DD
Reach: Famous in UK
Professional record: Came fourth on Big Brother.
Languages: English. Kind of.
She says: “Go back to the slums, Shilpa”
What they say about her: “"Oh please, learn some manners. You know what you need? You need elocution classes, Jade” – Shilpa.
Eviction odds: 1/50


SHILPA
Home: Mumbai, India
Age: 31
Height: 5’ 10”
Weight: 130 lbs
Bust: 32D
Reach: Famous worldwide
Professional record: Has made over 50 movies, is an AIDS activist and PETA spokesperson
Languages: Speaks English, Tulu, Hindi, Gujarati, Tamil and some French.
She says: “It is racist, I’m telling you”
What they say about her: Has been dubbed “the Indian Angelina Jolie”.
Eviction odds: 10/1
 
I accidently killed a PETA-phile during the seal hunt last year. Clubbed him to death, skinned him & made a lampshade out of him. He had no fur value.
 
Dirk is up too, but with Jade expected to beat the all time record of 91% of votes given to Sezer, it dosnt really matter who else is up.
 
I'm lovin' it. Blimey, I've become no better than a common Sun reader! :(

Just so long as there isn't one of those things where people think "oh, everyone will vote for Jade, I won't bother" and then Shilpa mysteriously loses.
 
Nah, people were saying that when Grace was up...and Jade is 48 times more evil than Grace. Then again, some might not vote as a protest against Channel 4 making us pay to end racism (forever!)
 
Anyone think they tried to make Shilpa look racist last night when the single moment they screened of no one arguing was when Ian asked her which bread she'd like, "white or brown", and then there was uncomfortable silence before Shilpa settled on brown?
 
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