Laker_Girl
Mrs. Big Dick McGee
I will only be updating you on the U.S. team as that is the only team I care about.
Okay so last night Jeremy Bloom choked but an adorable little chinky, Toby Dawson managed to take the Bronze in the moguls. That is one painful looking sport, my knees buckled just watching it. Nice uniforms by Tommy Hilfiger though, really top drawer.
The U.S. women choked on the downhill but what's new? Kudos to Kildrow though she came in a respectable 8th and that's not bad considering that she chewed ice the day before. Kildrow did not get the cheers that the stinky French skater got which was crap but then again the French skater has to be French and her face looks like she got beat with a baseball bat.
In women's short track speed skating Apolo Ohno's girlfriend (whose name I've blocked from my psyche) was taken down by a Korean and an Italian skater in the Semi's of the 500m but managed to scramble to her feet (Ohno 2002 style) and come in second to qualify for the final. I have no idea if they had the final or who won as I grew tried of the commentators reminding me that she was Ohno's girlfriend and watched "Fat Camp" on MTV instead.
Now on to my favorite event, men's short track speed skating starring the one and only, luscious and lovely Apolo Ohno. In the qualifying round of the men's 1000m Apolo managed to make it in in first place this time, I guess Mr. Hot Shot learned his lesson. Apolo also managed to pull it out for the U.S. in the men's 5000m relay. The lead U.S. skater started the race in fourth and as soon as he pushed Apolo's butt (the equivelent of passing the baton) Apolo pulled the U.S. into first place. A couple of skaters collided so it became a race between Italy and the U.S. and the U.S. came in first. The finals in both events will air Saturday.
Tonight Johnny Weir "The Super Duper Queer" competes in the men's freestyle ice skating event. TSDQ is currently in second and poised to take the silver however, I can not stand behind this guy, I will be rooting for the Russian. It isn't that Johnny is gay (I love the gays...in a non-faghag way) it's that he's super gay, stuck up gay, San Franciscan gay, if you will. I hate uppity gays and especially uppity gays that dress like swans and skate to Swan Lake and then try to be uppity gay about being so gay. So you can wish him luck if you like but I hope he falls on his gay, mullet sporting, tweezed eyebrows having, uppity gay ass.
Finally, snow boarding, my second favorite event. A new event tonight, snowboard cross, the motocross of snowboarding...Finally, white trash and snowboarding collide, it was only a matter of time. But at any rate, I have no idea why other countries bother to compete in snowboarding, the U.S. rules this sport but good luck to other countries even though I know we're going to kick your ass. There is a U.S. boarder favored to win but I have no idea who he is and I don't care. I do know if he won or not but I won't spoil it for you.
I'd like to end this with a little commentary on Shani Davis, the only black guy at the Olympics. Smooth move pulling out of the long track team event, we didn't qualify thanks to you. You claim you never planned to skate in the team event but maybe you should have told your coaches that more than four days before the event. You couldn't hack it in short track and he clearly can't hack it in long track. Pack your bags, get over your crush on Apolo Ohno and get back to the ghetto where you belong you ungrateful, pompous nigger.
Okay so last night Jeremy Bloom choked but an adorable little chinky, Toby Dawson managed to take the Bronze in the moguls. That is one painful looking sport, my knees buckled just watching it. Nice uniforms by Tommy Hilfiger though, really top drawer.
The U.S. women choked on the downhill but what's new? Kudos to Kildrow though she came in a respectable 8th and that's not bad considering that she chewed ice the day before. Kildrow did not get the cheers that the stinky French skater got which was crap but then again the French skater has to be French and her face looks like she got beat with a baseball bat.
In women's short track speed skating Apolo Ohno's girlfriend (whose name I've blocked from my psyche) was taken down by a Korean and an Italian skater in the Semi's of the 500m but managed to scramble to her feet (Ohno 2002 style) and come in second to qualify for the final. I have no idea if they had the final or who won as I grew tried of the commentators reminding me that she was Ohno's girlfriend and watched "Fat Camp" on MTV instead.
Now on to my favorite event, men's short track speed skating starring the one and only, luscious and lovely Apolo Ohno. In the qualifying round of the men's 1000m Apolo managed to make it in in first place this time, I guess Mr. Hot Shot learned his lesson. Apolo also managed to pull it out for the U.S. in the men's 5000m relay. The lead U.S. skater started the race in fourth and as soon as he pushed Apolo's butt (the equivelent of passing the baton) Apolo pulled the U.S. into first place. A couple of skaters collided so it became a race between Italy and the U.S. and the U.S. came in first. The finals in both events will air Saturday.
Tonight Johnny Weir "The Super Duper Queer" competes in the men's freestyle ice skating event. TSDQ is currently in second and poised to take the silver however, I can not stand behind this guy, I will be rooting for the Russian. It isn't that Johnny is gay (I love the gays...in a non-faghag way) it's that he's super gay, stuck up gay, San Franciscan gay, if you will. I hate uppity gays and especially uppity gays that dress like swans and skate to Swan Lake and then try to be uppity gay about being so gay. So you can wish him luck if you like but I hope he falls on his gay, mullet sporting, tweezed eyebrows having, uppity gay ass.
Finally, snow boarding, my second favorite event. A new event tonight, snowboard cross, the motocross of snowboarding...Finally, white trash and snowboarding collide, it was only a matter of time. But at any rate, I have no idea why other countries bother to compete in snowboarding, the U.S. rules this sport but good luck to other countries even though I know we're going to kick your ass. There is a U.S. boarder favored to win but I have no idea who he is and I don't care. I do know if he won or not but I won't spoil it for you.
I'd like to end this with a little commentary on Shani Davis, the only black guy at the Olympics. Smooth move pulling out of the long track team event, we didn't qualify thanks to you. You claim you never planned to skate in the team event but maybe you should have told your coaches that more than four days before the event. You couldn't hack it in short track and he clearly can't hack it in long track. Pack your bags, get over your crush on Apolo Ohno and get back to the ghetto where you belong you ungrateful, pompous nigger.
