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Lily Allen

Is that his real name?
 
I prefer Staruck Ohyes.
 
I'd like sexual relations with Lily Allen, but I'd do all sorts of nasty fucking stuff to her, just to shut her up.
 
Cramming her mouth full of albums you'd nicked from HMV would be an ironic twist.
 
What if they were infected with HIV?
 
Gagh said:
I'd like sexual relations with Lily Allen, but I'd do all sorts of nasty fucking stuff to her, just to shut her up.
Click to expand...

[youtube]v_4tQ3UZOlo[/youtube]
 
I'd make her wear an Alan Partridge mask and a traffic cone bra and have Gary Newman playing in the background.
 
That's 12th Guardian of the Underworld and Torturer of Souls Jimmy Carr hosting The Big Fat Quiz of the Year 2007.
 
Ugh, I hate Jimmy Carr. Smug shit.
 
Have you heard about him and the sports relief cycle race?

Everyone else has been taken turns from John O groats to lands end, he swans in for one ride today then pisses off again, hardly worth him turning out, but makes sure it gets publicity for his tour
 
I thought you were telling a joke until I reached the end.
 
That's the Jimmy Carr audience experience.
 
Better than the Peter Kay experience, where he just constantly asks the audience if they remember things.

"DO YOU REMEMBER BULLSEYE?"
"DO YOU REMEMBER SHATTERPROOF RULERS?, DO YOU?"

*Audience dies laughing*
 
hmm... maybe i'm thinking of someone else who's british.
 
Could be literally any of us.
 
"GARLIC BREAD? A SHIT EPISODE OF DOCTOR WHO? GARLIC BREAD?"
 
its spitting!
 
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