More horror-scopes!

[Kerb Crawler]

Monday's

Someone you've been admiring from a distance is about to approach you,
specifically to mention that the feelings are more than mutual. If
they're not entirely available, do what you do best. Smile, say thank you
and settle back to wait.

Um... yeah. This AIN'T gonna fly with the missus.

***

Tuesday's

There's not much that shakes your earthy emotional foundation, and when
something does, there's a reason. At the moment, you're not quite sure
that someone you really want to trust is worthy of that faith. Go with
your gut.

Sorry Val Kilmer's dick. It could've been fun.

***

Today's

That bonus, raise or promotion is so close you can taste it. Just don't
be in too much of a hurry -- not until you've gone over each and every
word of the fine print with someone you trust.

Sweet! MM's finally gonna give me that MOD STATUS I've been politic-ing for!!!!!!

 

[Mandi]

Well that horoscope doesn't do me any good

 

[Kerb Crawler]

Maybe you just need to look at it a different way. Think metaphorically, not realistically. It's all open to interpretation anyway.

 

[Kerb Crawler]

Saturday, the 29th.

Isn't it funny how things get done more efficiently when you're well
organized? Just a little advanced planning now will mean you get a lot
more accomplished than usual. Prepare to leave everyone wowed.

Hm. I think this had more to do with the fact that I was on vacation then anything else.

***
Sunday, the 30th.

Obviously, someone 'upstairs' is testing your patience, because
everyone who's crossing your path down here is arriving with information
that's either totally confusing or totally inaccurate. Either way, don't
sign anything -- not even a large check. The stars are serious.

I tested Fate. She blinked. And I had to sleep on the couch. (Actually, all kidding aside, THIS MAKES SO MUCH FUCKING SENSE NOW!)

***

Monday, the 31st. All Hallow's Eve.

What you're standing there staring at might be the perfect gift for
your sweetie, so whether or not there's a 'good' reason for buying it
really shouldn't enter into the equation. If it makes them happy, that's
enough. Right?

Wow, I totally did this, too!

***

Today, Tuesday, November 1st.

Watching what you've set into motion fall apart makes you crazy,
especially because you didn't arranged it that way. No matter what happens,
force yourself to remain calm. There's just no other way to handle it.

Words to live by. Getting all uppity rarely yields positive results. Just be coooooooool.
Like The Dude.

 

[Mandi]

oh shit, I don't like that horoscope........I think i'ma go hide!