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POLL: Saint Lucifer in reality a transsexual Wal-Mart employee named Mitch?

AND NOW I AM WITH YOU AGAIN, MY CHILDREN.I TOLD YOU OF THE STAR-CHILD, NAMED ADELE, WHO CAME TO ME WITH MANY REVELATIONS ABOUT HER WORLD OF ADOKALNAIEL, AND HER PEOPLE, THE ADO.I ALSO SPOKE OF HER KNOWLEDGE OF THE WINNOWING, HOW SOON AND VERY SOON, THOSE WHO ARE UNWORTHY TO COMMUNE WITH THE HIGHER LIFE FORMS OF THE STARS WILL INSTEAD BE DESTROYED BY ALL-CONSUMING DESTRUCTION.BUT HERE IS A SAD TRUTH, BRETHREN: WHILE ADELE WAS IN MY APARTMENT'S RESTROOM ONE MORNING, I WENT TO THE KITCHEN FOR A BEVERAGE. UNDER THE SMALL TABLE NEAR THE DOOR WAS A DARK OBJECT, OBSCURED BY SHADOWS.I REACHED DOWN AND DISCOVERED IT WAS OBVIOUSLY ADELE'S PURSE. CONFUSED AS TO WHY AN ADVANCED ALIEN BEING LIKE ADELE WOULD NEED A PURSE, I CHECKED TO SEE IF SHE WAS STILL IN THE RESTROOM AND THEN PROCEEDED TO INSPECT ITS CONTENTS.IT TURNS OUT ADELE OF THE PLANET ADOKALNAIEL WAS IN FACT MARGARET MORGAN OF SCHENECTADY, NEW YORK. I PRESENTED "ADELE" WITH THIS INFORMATION, WHICH SHE DISMISSED AS HER "SECRET HUMAN IDENTITY." SHE THEN PROCEEDED TO ASK ME IF I WANTED HER TO LEAVE. BEFORE I COULD ANSWER, SHE DROPPED TO HER KNEES AND WRAPPED MY SWOLLEN MEMBER IN THE HOT, WET ENFOLDINGS OF HER EAGER MOUTH. TEARS STREAMED FROM HER LARGE BLUE EYES.YES, ACCORDING TO HER DRIVER'S LICENSE, "ADELE" IS ONLY EIGHTEEN, AND YES, I AM IN MY LATE 30S. AND YES, "ADELE" IS REALLY MARGARET MORGAN, WHO I AM QUITE CERTAIN IS A RAGING NYMPHOMANIAC WHO COULD HAVE MORE INFESTATIONS THAN A TRASH CAN IN A PUBLIC PARK.BUT IN THAT MOMENT, AS SHE BEGAN TO FELLATE ME AS A PRELUDE WHAT BECAME A THREE-HOUR SEXUAL GAUNTLET, I REALIZED THAT MARGARET NEEDED MY HELP. SHE NEEDED ME. SHE HAD KNOWN OF THE QUIESCENCE, BUT ONLY BITS AND PIECES.I WOULD SHOW HER MORE. I WOULD TEACH HER MORE. AND SHE HAS TAUGHT ME.ONE THING I NEVER THOUGHT I'D EVER BE TAUGHT TO ENJOY: HAVING A WOMAN PUT A CONDOM ON HER MIDDLE FINGER AND THEN INSERTING IT INTO MY ANUS SO AS TO PUT PRESSURE ON MY PROSTATE, SINCE I HAVE ALWAYS TAKEN A VERY LONG TIME TO REACH ORGASM.I ALSO NEVER THOUGHT I'D BE WITH A WOMAN WHO WANTS ME TO EJACULATE IN HER NAVEL, EARS, AND ON HER FACE.YET HERE I AM, BRETHREN, IN A BRAVE NEW WORLD OF DISCOVERY AND EXPLORATION!I BRING YOU ALL GLAD TIDINGS AND REMEMBER: I HAVE NOT LEFT YOU OR FORGOTTEN MY MISSION TO THIS PLACE. I WILL RETURN AS OFTEN AS POSSIBLE AND CONTINUE OUR DISCOURSES ON THE QUIESCENCE!I HAVE BEEN DOING WELL, MY BROTHER.THIS MORNING, I WAS AWAKENED BY THE FLITTERING OF MARGARET'S TONGUE IN MY EARS, THEN MY MOUTH, THEN MY NIPPLES, DOWN TO MY PENIS, AND THEN AFTER GENEROUS ORAL PLEASURING, DOWN EVEN TO MY ANUS. THIS WAS A NEW SENSATION BUT EXTREMELY PLEASUREABLE.SO I AM DOING QUITE WELL, THANK YOU.WHY DO YOU NOT WISH TO READ OF MY EXPERIENCES, CHILD?THEY CAN HELP YOU.I MUST GO NOW. MARGARET CALLS TO ME. WE WERE JUST TAKING A SHOWER WHILE WAITING FOR THE SHEETS TO DRY. WE CHANGED THEM AFTER THEY BEGAN TO SMELL OF SWEAT AND THE BLEACH-LIKE ODOR OF MY MAN-GOO MIXED WITH THE SPICY, PUNGENT ODOR OF HER EVER-GLISTENING VULVA.MY FRIEND LORD OF THE DORKS,LET ME ASSURE YOU THAT UP TO NOW, MY JOURNEY ON THE QUIESCENT PATH HAS NEVER ONCE INVOLVED ILLEGAL NARCOTICS OR BARBITUATES.BUT I AM INDEED NOW IN THE THRALL OF A DRUG: THE FLESH OF A YOUNG, SEX-STARVED WOMAN.BUT STILL, I MEDITATE WHEN I CAN, INBETWEEN OUR SESSIONS. THE GIRL SLEEPS SOMETIMES, AFTER ALL. I HAVE COMMUNED WITH THE QUIESCENCE AND SOUGHT GUIDANCE.THUS FAR, THE QUIESCENCE IS PLEASED.AND SO TOO AM I.
 
Gagh said:
AND NOW I AM WITH YOU AGAIN, MY CHILDREN.I TOLD YOU OF THE STAR-CHILD, NAMED ADELE, WHO CAME TO ME WITH MANY REVELATIONS ABOUT HER WORLD OF ADOKALNAIEL, AND HER PEOPLE, THE ADO.I ALSO SPOKE OF HER KNOWLEDGE OF THE WINNOWING, HOW SOON AND VERY SOON, THOSE WHO ARE UNWORTHY TO COMMUNE WITH THE HIGHER LIFE FORMS OF THE STARS WILL INSTEAD BE DESTROYED BY ALL-CONSUMING DESTRUCTION.BUT HERE IS A SAD TRUTH, BRETHREN: WHILE ADELE WAS IN MY APARTMENT'S RESTROOM ONE MORNING, I WENT TO THE KITCHEN FOR A BEVERAGE. UNDER THE SMALL TABLE NEAR THE DOOR WAS A DARK OBJECT, OBSCURED BY SHADOWS.I REACHED DOWN AND DISCOVERED IT WAS OBVIOUSLY ADELE'S PURSE. CONFUSED AS TO WHY AN ADVANCED ALIEN BEING LIKE ADELE WOULD NEED A PURSE, I CHECKED TO SEE IF SHE WAS STILL IN THE RESTROOM AND THEN PROCEEDED TO INSPECT ITS CONTENTS.IT TURNS OUT ADELE OF THE PLANET ADOKALNAIEL WAS IN FACT MARGARET MORGAN OF SCHENECTADY, NEW YORK. I PRESENTED "ADELE" WITH THIS INFORMATION, WHICH SHE DISMISSED AS HER "SECRET HUMAN IDENTITY." SHE THEN PROCEEDED TO ASK ME IF I WANTED HER TO LEAVE. BEFORE I COULD ANSWER, SHE DROPPED TO HER KNEES AND WRAPPED MY SWOLLEN MEMBER IN THE HOT, WET ENFOLDINGS OF HER EAGER MOUTH. TEARS STREAMED FROM HER LARGE BLUE EYES.YES, ACCORDING TO HER DRIVER'S LICENSE, "ADELE" IS ONLY EIGHTEEN, AND YES, I AM IN MY LATE 30S. AND YES, "ADELE" IS REALLY MARGARET MORGAN, WHO I AM QUITE CERTAIN IS A RAGING NYMPHOMANIAC WHO COULD HAVE MORE INFESTATIONS THAN A TRASH CAN IN A PUBLIC PARK.BUT IN THAT MOMENT, AS SHE BEGAN TO FELLATE ME AS A PRELUDE WHAT BECAME A THREE-HOUR SEXUAL GAUNTLET, I REALIZED THAT MARGARET NEEDED MY HELP. SHE NEEDED ME. SHE HAD KNOWN OF THE QUIESCENCE, BUT ONLY BITS AND PIECES.I WOULD SHOW HER MORE. I WOULD TEACH HER MORE. AND SHE HAS TAUGHT ME.ONE THING I NEVER THOUGHT I'D EVER BE TAUGHT TO ENJOY: HAVING A WOMAN PUT A CONDOM ON HER MIDDLE FINGER AND THEN INSERTING IT INTO MY ANUS SO AS TO PUT PRESSURE ON MY PROSTATE, SINCE I HAVE ALWAYS TAKEN A VERY LONG TIME TO REACH ORGASM.I ALSO NEVER THOUGHT I'D BE WITH A WOMAN WHO WANTS ME TO EJACULATE IN HER NAVEL, EARS, AND ON HER FACE.YET HERE I AM, BRETHREN, IN A BRAVE NEW WORLD OF DISCOVERY AND EXPLORATION!I BRING YOU ALL GLAD TIDINGS AND REMEMBER: I HAVE NOT LEFT YOU OR FORGOTTEN MY MISSION TO THIS PLACE. I WILL RETURN AS OFTEN AS POSSIBLE AND CONTINUE OUR DISCOURSES ON THE QUIESCENCE!I HAVE BEEN DOING WELL, MY BROTHER.THIS MORNING, I WAS AWAKENED BY THE FLITTERING OF MARGARET'S TONGUE IN MY EARS, THEN MY MOUTH, THEN MY NIPPLES, DOWN TO MY PENIS, AND THEN AFTER GENEROUS ORAL PLEASURING, DOWN EVEN TO MY ANUS. THIS WAS A NEW SENSATION BUT EXTREMELY PLEASUREABLE.SO I AM DOING QUITE WELL, THANK YOU.WHY DO YOU NOT WISH TO READ OF MY EXPERIENCES, CHILD?THEY CAN HELP YOU.I MUST GO NOW. MARGARET CALLS TO ME. WE WERE JUST TAKING A SHOWER WHILE WAITING FOR THE SHEETS TO DRY. WE CHANGED THEM AFTER THEY BEGAN TO SMELL OF SWEAT AND THE BLEACH-LIKE ODOR OF MY MAN-GOO MIXED WITH THE SPICY, PUNGENT ODOR OF HER EVER-GLISTENING VULVA.MY FRIEND LORD OF THE DORKS,LET ME ASSURE YOU THAT UP TO NOW, MY JOURNEY ON THE QUIESCENT PATH HAS NEVER ONCE INVOLVED ILLEGAL NARCOTICS OR BARBITUATES.BUT I AM INDEED NOW IN THE THRALL OF A DRUG: THE FLESH OF A YOUNG, SEX-STARVED WOMAN.BUT STILL, I MEDITATE WHEN I CAN, INBETWEEN OUR SESSIONS. THE GIRL SLEEPS SOMETIMES, AFTER ALL. I HAVE COMMUNED WITH THE QUIESCENCE AND SOUGHT GUIDANCE.THUS FAR, THE QUIESCENCE IS PLEASED.AND SO TOO AM I.
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!
 
Or his duals. Which the retard was notoriously bad at handling he outed them in dumbassed fashion within a week of registering.
 
Hey guys,

Nice of you to say such kind words.

You know only a little of what you speak of.

Nevertheless, enjoy yourselves.
 
The "I'm only pretending to be a stupid twat" gambit usually fails because the user is generally a stupid twat in a completely unrelated way.
 
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