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Rants of teh day

whisky

whisky

Boobie inspector
1 if you are married to me and know I only have a five minute window to get back to sleep in the middle of the night before I lose the ability and are up have the night, do not engage me in conversation at 2AM

2 if its your job to man the rides at a childrens adventure land, do not be a complete and utter miserable twat

3 If you are a member of a BBS (not this one) and you start a stupid thread saying stupid things and I pull you up on it, do not PM me and tell me not to post in your threads

4 if you are me and have speant the entire day feeling tired, do not go to bed and then not be tired

5 if you are acohol make me sleepy like you do every other night

6 if you run a porn channel on sky and the watershed is 9PM do not make everyone wait till ten before any of them get their tits out, and for gods sake would it kill you to show a little vag now and again?

7 if you are my son do not keep avoiding going to sleep by coming up with ever more elaberate excuses why you cant sleep, like you suddenly have an aversion to the colour blue

8 if you are god quit killing people I like

9 if you are a scenitist, why the fuck have we not got hover boards?

10 if you are going to release a dvd animated version of the dark night returns 30 years after it was first a comic, do not release it about a week before the dark night rises comes out on dvd, then make it in an animation style so crappy looking it makes your average spoof flash video look like Akira.
 
I've got a couple about a co-worker but they're not as amusing as yours.

She's always correcting me, always in front of someone. When it's just us, not so much. I was talking about 'them' finally putting some wood chips on the ground out in front of the building and she acts like I'm speaking a foreign language and then the superior little chuckle with "OOOOh, you mean wood bark." Are you so fucking dense that you honestly had no idea what I was talking about?

Then yesterday someone came up to the office, and I said "hey, I just sent you a PM to tell..." but before I could finish the sentence, she says "you mean an IM." I got a little cranky then and said "PM means private message. *uncomfortable pause* Does it matter?"

Shut the fuck up, bitch.
 
It's so fucking inconsiderate of your wife to expect to be able to speak to the man she's married to if something's bothering her at 2AM.


Fucking sever.
 
I posted this at another forum but I'm still pissed off and need to vent again.

For some reason, a 'discussion' that happened at another forum from around Christmas of last year popped into my head this morning. A woman was complaining bitterly about her poor son being stationed at the 'shithole' USMC base in Hawaii... too far to walk to downtown, poor neighborhood right outside the base, that big meany Obama fucking up his plans to golf on Christmas.

What. A. Fucking. Asshole.

Is there any base, anywhere in the world that's in a 'nice' neighborhood? And this is a marine that survived Afghanistan, I doubt walking past some hookers is gonna bother him. And that whole whine about Obama playing golf on a military base in his home state... Jesus Christ, lady, he's the president of the United fucking States. Your son's a marine. He should take a bullet for his commander in chief, golf is a non-issue. Bitch.
 
I posted this at another forum but I'm still pissed off and need to vent again.

For some reason, a 'discussion' that happened at another forum from around Christmas of last year popped into my head this morning. A woman was complaining bitterly about her poor son being stationed at the 'shithole' USMC base in Hawaii... too far to walk to downtown, poor neighborhood right outside the base, that big meany Obama fucking up his plans to golf on Christmas.

What. A. Fucking. Asshole.

Is there any base, anywhere in the world that's in a 'nice' neighborhood? And this is a marine that survived Afghanistan, I doubt walking past some hookers is gonna bother him. And that whole whine about Obama playing golf on a military base in his home state... Jesus Christ, lady, he's the president of the United fucking States. Your son's a marine. He should take a bullet for his commander in chief, golf is a non-issue. Bitch.
 
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