Red Whacker

[FederalAgent007]

I need some advice. I have some criminals and government agents harassing and threatening me. I get confused as to who the criminals are and who the government employees are so I just lump them all together.

The Question: My friends and co-workers have recommended I purchase a gun and learn how to use it. Do you think I should get a sawed off shotgun or semi-automatic weapon?? The reason I am axing is cause I only shot a gun once and it scared the person who was teaching me really bad because my aim was waaaaaaay off. I feel like a shotgun would be good cause all I would have to do is just point it, close my eyes and pull the trigger.

What do you think?

 

[The Question]

I think you should be legally barred from owning anything which you could potentially use to do harm to yourself or others, right down to a sharp pencil. Ever. And by the way, GuFe, did you know that it's a federal offense to impersonate a federal agent?