Sredni Vashtar
the beautiful
As the spark of originality continues to dwindle from the Hollywood zeitgeist, I'm hereby jumping on the Retro Bandwagon {or whatever they're calling it now) and declaring what shows & movies I'd like to see remade:
The Six Million Dollar Man: Honestly surprised that they haven't done this yet...and of course these days $6M will probably fund a bionic toenail.
StarBlazers: Lose the "lets hollow out a derelict WWII battleship and make a starship inside!" idea; throw some more chicks in it and you have a hell of series: A real timeline drama with great characters and plot twists, all ready to go.
Soylent Green: I actually watched the whole thing for the first time a few months ago. With CGI like Massiv (?) they could really go nuts portraying the hordes of an overpopulated earth. And putting the whole "...it's PEOPLE!!!" part a little earlier in the narrative, so we can see what effect this revelation has on the populace, would make the ending slightly less retarded.
Laserblast: One of the dumbest movies ever made so I say WHY THE FUCK NOT? It could only improve by comparison to the original. (In case you've never heard of it: A teenager gets an alien weapon attached to his arm which possesses him and he roams the countryside, randomly blowing shit up until the aliens track him down. The End.) Seriously, It's like a film for people who thought Repo Man was too intellectual, but with the right director & script the potential for both satire and popcorn-gnoshin fun is gigantic.
The Car: Very obscure horror flick (don't know if it's even available on DVD or VHS...I have an old bootleg) from '77 about an indestructible, driverless, hearse-like car that roams the highways mowing people down. It's essentially a 100-minute Twilight Zone episode that rode the demon-possession wave of films like Exorcist and Omen. But again: Lots of potential, and the ending kicks prodigious ass.
More later.
The Six Million Dollar Man: Honestly surprised that they haven't done this yet...and of course these days $6M will probably fund a bionic toenail.
StarBlazers: Lose the "lets hollow out a derelict WWII battleship and make a starship inside!" idea; throw some more chicks in it and you have a hell of series: A real timeline drama with great characters and plot twists, all ready to go.
Soylent Green: I actually watched the whole thing for the first time a few months ago. With CGI like Massiv (?) they could really go nuts portraying the hordes of an overpopulated earth. And putting the whole "...it's PEOPLE!!!" part a little earlier in the narrative, so we can see what effect this revelation has on the populace, would make the ending slightly less retarded.
Laserblast: One of the dumbest movies ever made so I say WHY THE FUCK NOT? It could only improve by comparison to the original. (In case you've never heard of it: A teenager gets an alien weapon attached to his arm which possesses him and he roams the countryside, randomly blowing shit up until the aliens track him down. The End.) Seriously, It's like a film for people who thought Repo Man was too intellectual, but with the right director & script the potential for both satire and popcorn-gnoshin fun is gigantic.
The Car: Very obscure horror flick (don't know if it's even available on DVD or VHS...I have an old bootleg) from '77 about an indestructible, driverless, hearse-like car that roams the highways mowing people down. It's essentially a 100-minute Twilight Zone episode that rode the demon-possession wave of films like Exorcist and Omen. But again: Lots of potential, and the ending kicks prodigious ass.
More later.
