Star Trek 11 script excerpt

[CaptainWacky]

Worf: Captain, I may know somebody on Cardassia who can give us access to that area. However...

Picard: What, Mister Worf?

Worf: He is...not entirely trustworthy...at times...

(CUT TO Cardassia Prime. Picard is talking to a Cardassian who has his back to us.)

Picard: ...so, we would be most grateful if you would help us.

Cardassian: It would be a most special pleasure, captan.

Picard: Thank you, umm...I don't believe I know your title.

(He turns round. It's Garak!)

Garak: Oh, no title. It's just Garak. Plain, simple Garak.

 

[Mentalist]

Be the best opener to any Next Gen movie, thats for sure.

 

[CaptainWacky]

Thanks me old ming vase.

 

[The Question]

Garak was an alien couch.

 

[Sarek]

More a love seat/ottoman combination IMO.

 

[The Question]

Definitely furnishings of a most unsettling variety.

 

[CaptainWacky]

Masoof

 

[Gagh]

Picard: Gut us out of here, Warp 9, suggestions, Commander?

Riker: I suggest heading towards the nebula. We could hide in the gas - that would confuse their sensors.

Worf: Suggest we fire a quantum torpedo toward the surface, Captain

Picard: PORTMAMN PRPTOAMRT MAN POTYM PORTMAN PROTY MAN PROTANMN PORTMAN PORTMAN PROTN AM PRMTN APORTMAN!

 

[CaptainWacky]

That would rule if Q put my brain in Picard's body.

 

[Gagh]

Portman (Appearing on the bridge for no reason): Why do I have these little pieces of metal glued to my face & hands? Why am I in this silver lycra catsuit? Why is my hair gelled back like this? Why have my breasts tripled in size?

B&B: It's the way we like 'em, baby!

 

[CaptainWacky]

Garak: Do you want me to shoot her now?

Tom Paris: NO YOU BASTARD YOU CAN'T SHOOT NATALIE.

Garak: I was going to say shoot her...a smile!

Paris: Oooooh!

(Garak pulls out a phaser and disintegrate Natalie.)

Garak: OOPS LOL BONC!

PARIS: NOODODOLE

Odo: HMMMPH

Gagh: Crying baby image.

Blingroping: ADSJILGasg

THE ROCK: SOMETHSAG
M
Menty: BONC

THE ROCK: BONC

Emam Watson: ASGd

GAgh: aSJ

Menty: ASHNGLAS

SHATNA: HEIDEN-HEIDENREICH!

Berman: We are very pleased.

Everyone else int he world: Well we're not!