CaptainWacky
I want to smell dark matter
"But I hate clows, grandad!" said Billy.
"Oh nonense!" said his grandad. "All you kids today say you hate clowns, it's the trendy thing to say! You just haven't seen a really good clown."
Billy just shook his head and walked on reluctantly. He had had fun with his grandad at the old time circus. Sure, it wasn't as exciting as the big circuses but it had a certain charm. He was not happy, however, with his grandad's insistence that they see the clown.
"Grandad, I really, honestly, truly hate clowns!" said Billy one last time, as they arrived at the clown's dressing room.
"Well I've already knocked the door!" said his grandad.
"No you haven't!" said Billy. His grandad knocked the door.
"I have now!" he chortled.
"Coooooome in little boy!" came a creepy voice. Grandad walked in but Billy paused.
"Did you hear that? He's probably a paedophile!" said Billy.
"Where did you learn bad words like that!?" snapped his grandad.
"I'm eight, I'm not an idiot," said Billy. They went inside. The clown was even older than Billy's grandad. His make-up couldn't disguise his wrinkles. He quickly pulled a green wig over his bald, prunelike head.
"Haha, caught me with my pants down!" said the clown. And then his baggy trousers dropped down, showing his spotty boxer shorts. "OOOP!" he added.
"I told you!" said Billy, angry.
"Hush, child!" said his grandad. "Hello Bonkers...it's been a long time."
"Indeed, indeed. Is this little Billy then? Why he looks just like you did when you were a boy!" said the clown. He reached out to shake Billy's hand. Billy hesitated.
"Don't be rude!" said Grandad. Billy shook the clowns hand and received a mild shock.
"HOHOHO!" laughed Bonkers. Billy would almost kicked him but remembered that he was a very old man.
"You've still got it, bonkers!" said grandad, admiration in his voice.
"LA LA LA!" sang Bonkers, juggling some oranges then dropping them on the floor. Grandad laughed heartily. Billy did not even smile.
"I need a pee, Grandad," said Billy.
"DO IT IN MY HANDS!" said Bonkers, cupping his hands and holding them out to Billy.
"NO!" said Billy, storming out. Grandad shrugged.
"Well, I guess he'll be waiting outside for you soon," said Bonkers.
"He just doesn't understand," said Grandad, sadly. "He actually thought you might force him to have sex with you."
"Poor deluded child," said Bonkers. "I never had to force YOU to do anything and I wouldn't him."
"No," said Grandad, removing his false teeth. "I enjoyed it right from the start."
"Let's see if you can still suck!" said Bonkers. Grandad got down on his knees (his bones creaking) and pulled down Bonker's boxer shorts.
"You know I can..." said Grandad.
Outside, Billy was listening at the door, shocked. Then he got an idea and smiled. "I wonder how much he'll pay me not to tell grandmother..." he said to himself.
"Oh nonense!" said his grandad. "All you kids today say you hate clowns, it's the trendy thing to say! You just haven't seen a really good clown."
Billy just shook his head and walked on reluctantly. He had had fun with his grandad at the old time circus. Sure, it wasn't as exciting as the big circuses but it had a certain charm. He was not happy, however, with his grandad's insistence that they see the clown.
"Grandad, I really, honestly, truly hate clowns!" said Billy one last time, as they arrived at the clown's dressing room.
"Well I've already knocked the door!" said his grandad.
"No you haven't!" said Billy. His grandad knocked the door.
"I have now!" he chortled.
"Coooooome in little boy!" came a creepy voice. Grandad walked in but Billy paused.
"Did you hear that? He's probably a paedophile!" said Billy.
"Where did you learn bad words like that!?" snapped his grandad.
"I'm eight, I'm not an idiot," said Billy. They went inside. The clown was even older than Billy's grandad. His make-up couldn't disguise his wrinkles. He quickly pulled a green wig over his bald, prunelike head.
"Haha, caught me with my pants down!" said the clown. And then his baggy trousers dropped down, showing his spotty boxer shorts. "OOOP!" he added.
"I told you!" said Billy, angry.
"Hush, child!" said his grandad. "Hello Bonkers...it's been a long time."
"Indeed, indeed. Is this little Billy then? Why he looks just like you did when you were a boy!" said the clown. He reached out to shake Billy's hand. Billy hesitated.
"Don't be rude!" said Grandad. Billy shook the clowns hand and received a mild shock.
"HOHOHO!" laughed Bonkers. Billy would almost kicked him but remembered that he was a very old man.
"You've still got it, bonkers!" said grandad, admiration in his voice.
"LA LA LA!" sang Bonkers, juggling some oranges then dropping them on the floor. Grandad laughed heartily. Billy did not even smile.
"I need a pee, Grandad," said Billy.
"DO IT IN MY HANDS!" said Bonkers, cupping his hands and holding them out to Billy.
"NO!" said Billy, storming out. Grandad shrugged.
"Well, I guess he'll be waiting outside for you soon," said Bonkers.
"He just doesn't understand," said Grandad, sadly. "He actually thought you might force him to have sex with you."
"Poor deluded child," said Bonkers. "I never had to force YOU to do anything and I wouldn't him."
"No," said Grandad, removing his false teeth. "I enjoyed it right from the start."
"Let's see if you can still suck!" said Bonkers. Grandad got down on his knees (his bones creaking) and pulled down Bonker's boxer shorts.
"You know I can..." said Grandad.
Outside, Billy was listening at the door, shocked. Then he got an idea and smiled. "I wonder how much he'll pay me not to tell grandmother..." he said to himself.
