CaptainWacky
I want to smell dark matter
Eddie the Egg was cold. It was one of the downsides of living in a fridge.
"Hey, Ollie!" he shouted down to Ollie the orange juice carton. "Brrr! It's like a fridge in here, isn't it!"
"Very funny," said Ollie. "You really crack me up, Eddy."
"Good one, dude!" said Louie the lettuce. "Crack! He's an egg! Hehe!"
"Thanks for explaining Louie, I never would have got it without your help," said Eddy and he would have rolled his eyes had he had any.
"Will you guys stop shouting? Some of us are trying to sleep!" shouted Charlie the bottom cheese slice in the packet of ten (eight remaining).
"Oh, it's okay for you!" said Claire the second from top cheese slice in the packet. "You won't be eaten for ages! I'm at the top and I want to be awake for every second I have left!"
"Well Clarence is sleeping too, aren't you Clarence?" said Charlie, talking about the very top cheese slice in the packet.
"That's because his wife died, you insensitive bastard!" said Claire. "Every momen he's awake is torture to him!"
"I want to die," moaned Clarence, who had woken up.
"You don't have long to wait now!" said Eddie, reassuringly.
"He always has eggs in the morning, you know," said Tommy the tomato. "So Eddy, if you go...I'll miss you, man."
"Nah, I'll live forever!" said Eddy. "I'm a born survivor I am!" It was just then that the fridge door opened. All the food went silent. A huge hand reached in...and removed Ollie. The door closed.
"He's drinking Ollie!" cried Claire.
"Yeah, but at least I'm still okay!" said Eddy.
The door opened again and Ollie was put back in.
"Urrgh...I'm three quarters empty!" he moaned.
"That's rough, pal," said Eddy. "Still, at least I'm okay!" The door opened again.
"Shit, forgot the egg!" said the human, grabbing Eddy.
"YAAAAAAAAARGH!" screamed Eddy, as the door shut.
"I think this egg just screamed!" said the human. He shrugged his shoulders and cracked Eddy against a bowl.
"Do you think Eddy's okay?" asked Tommy.
"I think he's in EGGcelent condition!" said Louie.
Eddy's cracked shell was dropped in the bin.
"Ha!" said the cracked shell "Told you I'd be okay!"
"Hey, Ollie!" he shouted down to Ollie the orange juice carton. "Brrr! It's like a fridge in here, isn't it!"
"Very funny," said Ollie. "You really crack me up, Eddy."
"Good one, dude!" said Louie the lettuce. "Crack! He's an egg! Hehe!"
"Thanks for explaining Louie, I never would have got it without your help," said Eddy and he would have rolled his eyes had he had any.
"Will you guys stop shouting? Some of us are trying to sleep!" shouted Charlie the bottom cheese slice in the packet of ten (eight remaining).
"Oh, it's okay for you!" said Claire the second from top cheese slice in the packet. "You won't be eaten for ages! I'm at the top and I want to be awake for every second I have left!"
"Well Clarence is sleeping too, aren't you Clarence?" said Charlie, talking about the very top cheese slice in the packet.
"That's because his wife died, you insensitive bastard!" said Claire. "Every momen he's awake is torture to him!"
"I want to die," moaned Clarence, who had woken up.
"You don't have long to wait now!" said Eddie, reassuringly.
"He always has eggs in the morning, you know," said Tommy the tomato. "So Eddy, if you go...I'll miss you, man."
"Nah, I'll live forever!" said Eddy. "I'm a born survivor I am!" It was just then that the fridge door opened. All the food went silent. A huge hand reached in...and removed Ollie. The door closed.
"He's drinking Ollie!" cried Claire.
"Yeah, but at least I'm still okay!" said Eddy.
The door opened again and Ollie was put back in.
"Urrgh...I'm three quarters empty!" he moaned.
"That's rough, pal," said Eddy. "Still, at least I'm okay!" The door opened again.
"Shit, forgot the egg!" said the human, grabbing Eddy.
"YAAAAAAAAARGH!" screamed Eddy, as the door shut.
"I think this egg just screamed!" said the human. He shrugged his shoulders and cracked Eddy against a bowl.
"Do you think Eddy's okay?" asked Tommy.
"I think he's in EGGcelent condition!" said Louie.
Eddy's cracked shell was dropped in the bin.
"Ha!" said the cracked shell "Told you I'd be okay!"
