Alan Lee did some art for this series of books. I haven't read them but I did check some reviews and it seems like an utter shameless rip of the first order of LOTR.
Check this shit out:
Check this shit out:
Some writers can take the most mediocre storyline and transform it into something special through good writing and characters. "Iron Tower" trilogy is not one of those special stories. The flaws are many and varied: the characters are paper-thin and occasionally laughable, the action is dull, about ninety percent of the stuff going on is ripped off from Tolkien, and the writing style and dialogue range from mediocre to downright silly. It's one of those books where you keep reading because it seems impossible that it could get any worse.
Tuck Underbank is the hero, a Warrow (hobbit, right down to meals and baths) living in the Boskydells (Shire) who is called out to aid the high king Aurion (Theoden?) and his son Galen (Aragorn) in defeating the evil Modru (Sauron) and his dark forces of rukhs, lokhs and ogres (orcs, uruk-hai and trolls) as well as the Ghuls (Nazgul) and Vulgs (wargs). Tuck teams up with a fiery dwarf Brega (Gimli) and a majestic elf warrior Gildor (Legolas) and is drawn into Gron (Mordor) to defeat Modru.
The storyline of this trilogy is the same as Tolkien and many other fantasies: Heroes travel across land to defeat Big Bad Evil Villain. Emotional trauma. Battles. Magic. It's all laid out in Diana Wynne-Jones's "Tough Guide to Fantasyland." Comparisons to Tolkien are, let's face it, inevitable...Even if this is a tribute, it's not even a GOOD tribute!
This book lacks the texture of Tolkien's writing. There's none of the majesty and mystery. Additionally, he does not seem to understand that saying a character is a hero and telling us why is not enough to make us BELIEVE it. Let the person's actions throughout the book tell us why. And these characters, unfortunately, grow more paper-thin as the story progresses -- the more there are of them, the less we care. The character interactions range from ludicrous to nauseating, from the weird buddy-buddy dialogue of Tuck and his allies to his too-cute-to-stomach romance with Merrilee.
The ripoffs are many and varied: ancient battle between good and evil is exactly like Tolkien's (including McKiernan's own Eru and Morgoth). The dwarf mine-city; tentacled beastie outside magical concealed doors; Balrog/Ghath; Boskydells; Warrows; the horn given to Patrel; the Elven retreat where our heroes rest for a while; several character names; amazingly dull "Elfess Rael"/Galadriel; the blue-glowing dagger-sword Bane belonging to Tuck... The list goes on and on. In addition, the characters have the outward appearance of the LOTR characters, but none of the depth: Tuck has all of Frodo's angst, but no reason for it; Modru is a caricature, Sauron without his menace; Galen has all of the commanding presence of Aragorn, but nothing to back it up; Brega has all of Gimli's stubbornness and occasional obnoxiousness, but none of his fire or dignity; Gildor is graceful and elegant, but has none of Legolas's quirky sense of humor, athleticism, humility or gentle teasing.
Some elements are removed -- most notably Sam, Gandalf and the Ring. Unfortunately the gaps are filled by original elements. Events near the end, lacking a Ring, are utterly original -- and ludicrous. Tuck's love interest is Merrilee, who is one of the most annoying female characters I have ever read about. She goes alternately from weepy to a frenzied military advisor (who even lectures a seasoned general on tactics!). Patrel is actually a fairly nice character, but Danner is a pain: He's like a hobbit needing Prozac, perpetually taking offense and wanting to go out and kick Spawn...
But perhaps the worst is Princess Laurelin, whom the male characters spend about half of the book praising and thinking about ("For the Lady Laurelin!") despite the fact that she never actually seems to DO anything. She's so relentlessly sweet and kind and lovely that she made my teeth ache. She is also a Damsel In Distress -- she's kidnapped, and spends many, many pages whining to herself and crying in the dark. (For all the complaints about Tolkien's women, they never were DiDs -- sometimes they even rescued the men!) Compared to the capable and tough Eowyn, Laurelin is helpless. There are sexist comments about women's importance and abilities, and Laurelin's preoccupation with her appearance -- they contradict his heavy-handed gender equality message in Book Two.
McKiernan's writing is about equal to a 9-12 book, but kids will get bored quickly with the endless descriptions of castle construction, mountain passes, and the history of forts. The editing is terrible. When we're first introduced to Laurelin, her eye color is mentioned twice in the same sentence. Run-on sentences abound, and semicolons are used with abandon. There are references to good guys smiling and "showing teeth", which is usually considered menacing. Whenever one of the Warrows does or says something even vaguely amusing, everyone in the room falls over laughing. In addition, McKiernan constantly repeats himself: Tuck's eyes must be called "sapphirine" about ten thousand times. Ditto with hair color and clothing color. (Okay! Laurelin is blond! Igon wears red! We get it!)
The characters spend too much time crying. Tuck is the worst -- every other page, he's sobbing, tearing up, or weeping about something or other. Another problem is dialogue. No one talks like these people do. Warrows switch from dialect to dialect: from Cockney to pirate to ordinary English -- and some accents I can't identify. Men and Elves switch between normal speech and formal speech, often in the same conversation and with no warning. And someone needs to tell Mr. McKiernan that it doesn't count as an ancient dialect if you spell words funny. (Example: "Hal! Heah Adoni cnawen ure weg!" as "Hail! High Adon knows our way!")
I get the distinct impression that this is LOTR -- as Mr. McKiernan thinks it should have been written. Bad, astonishingly bad....
