The net closes in

[headvoid]

I am going to interview someone called Dan Brown.

He might actually be quite good, but it will be very hard to explain.

Hi, you are actually a very good candidate but when you came in and said "I am Dan Brown" it scared me because of a user on a strange forum that I visit is called that and he may or may not have some stuff about the occult in his head and I don't like the idea that maybe this is forming some sort of pattern and I will get paranoid that the net is closing in and I will wake up to find an albino priest in my bedroom.

I hope you understand

 

[FBI parte due]

Come at him with a massive list of real and perceived inconsistencies, fabrications, and flaws you found in The Da Vinci Code and Angels and Demons and yell at him every time he insists he's not that Dan Brown and he has no idea what you're talking about. When he finally gets disgusted and gets up to leave, tell him he's "passed the test" and that he's got the job, but don't actually tell anyone else you've hired him and continue the interview process as if you'd never seen him.

 

[CaptainWacky]

Literally do everything FBI just said.

 

[Fuddlemiff]

BUMPDATE PLEASE

 

[headvoid]

He never returned my calls

 

[CaptainWacky]

Jumped up fucker.

 

[Cassie]

It was the real Dan Brown!

 

[Seph]

he knew of your devilish interview technique.

 

[headvoid]

I think it was the fact I gave him directions to the office with cut out words from a bible stuck onto the back of a Mona Lisa.

 

[Seph]

LMFAO

 

[Cassie]

Can you imagine what it's liek being the guy named Dan Brown, but not being DAN BROWN?

 

[Seph]

social outcast? budding sociopath?

 

[Seph]

i give up ¯\(o_°)/¯

 

[Cassie]

Hunted by the Vatican secret police, constantly given cryptic messages by HEADVOID types, hounded for autographs. DOGS AND CATS LIVING TOGETHER.

 

[Seph]

¯\(o_°)/¯

 

[CaptainWacky]

What was the twist in his latest book?

 

[Fuddlemiff]

The Apostle did it.

 

[CaptainWacky]

NO!

 

[Seph]

NO!

 

[CaptainWacky]

BUT HE WAS THE CHOSEN ONE