CaptainWacky
I want to smell dark matter
fdjkl IT' STHE MOST WONDERFUL TIME OF THE YEAR
DING DONG DING DONG
WITH MUCH MISTLETOOING AND RAPING TO AND THRO-ING AND MURDER! IT'S THE MOST WONDERFUL TIME...
DING
THE MOST WONDERFUL TIME!!
DONG
THE MOST WONDEFUL TIME OF THE YEAR!!!!!!!!!!!!! RAPE RAPE RAPE RAPE RAEPE!
anyway
________________________
"Uhhh...my head...my Johnny head...my...Johnny's head hurts!" Awaking in unfamiliar surroundings, Johnny quickly decdied to adapt a new personality to cope. This personality would involve talking about himself in the third person and...well, he didn't know what else. He'd make it up as he went along.
"Don't sit up too fast, mister Norman," said a nurse, standing over his bed. A SEXY NURSE!? He couldn't quite tell. His vision was blurred. Why was is vision blurred? Something had slammed into his back. A car, he though. He'd been going to see the cow and had been hitten...hit, by a car. So he was in hospital. That was logical. But how did the nurse know his real surname?
"It's NOSE! Johnny Nose...Johnny The Fuck Nose! No, I'm not...Johnny's not a fucknose! Don't you go telling people that Johnny's a fucknose! It's just...Johnny's name is Nose. Johnny Nose. Tell the people Johnny's name is Johnny Nose. Not the other."
"I'll...I'll do that. Umm, there's someone here who wants to see you...maybe not for the best right now though, you just rest up and..."
"Someone to see me...Johnny Nose? SOMEONE TO SEE MY JOHNNY NOSE? MY PRECIOUS NICE PRECIOUS! GOLLUM, GOLLUM! My back hurts."
"You were hit by a car, Johnny."
"What did I ever do to the car?"
"We need to do tests on you..."
"WANT TO SEE MY VISITOR! SEND HIM IN!"
"It's a she..."
"OH MY FUCKING GOD IS IT SHAKIRA? She's wanted to ride my sex stick for years! I wish my vision wasn't blurred!"
"Blurred vision?"
"Uhh...a joke. I'm fine. Everybody's fine, now. How are you?"
"If you have blurred vision you need to tell me..."
"FUCKING VISITOR WANT...ME DO...FUCKING VISITOR...SEND HER IN...NAKED! IF I CAN'T SEE I'LL FEEL MY WAY AROUND HER! HAHA!"
"This isn't a..."
"Is he okay?" Another voice. Another figure stepped in. Who was it!? Couldn't be wheelchair girl, what was her name again? Couldn't be her, wasn't in a wheelchair. Her figure was quite nice. Johnny wondered if he could still get an erection after his accident. He tried really hard.
"WHO'S THERE?" he shouted, his penis still soft.
"Hey Johnny," she said, stepping closer. "It's me, your cousin Susan. Remember me?"
"SUSAN! I WANT TO HUMP YOU!"
"The accident, it might have effected his personality," said the nurse.
"No," said Susan. "He's always been like this."
"How did you know I was here, sweetnips?"
"I was visiting a friend, saw you getting wheeled in. Haven't seen you for years, but I knew it was you."
"A friend? DOES SHE HAVE HERPES?"
"No, she has cancer."
"Oh. SLUT!"
"Johnny...do you want me to call your parents?"
No! NO! "Yes," said Johnny, then fell asleep.
DING DONG DING DONG
WITH MUCH MISTLETOOING AND RAPING TO AND THRO-ING AND MURDER! IT'S THE MOST WONDERFUL TIME...
DING
THE MOST WONDERFUL TIME!!
DONG
THE MOST WONDEFUL TIME OF THE YEAR!!!!!!!!!!!!! RAPE RAPE RAPE RAPE RAEPE!
anyway
________________________
"Uhhh...my head...my Johnny head...my...Johnny's head hurts!" Awaking in unfamiliar surroundings, Johnny quickly decdied to adapt a new personality to cope. This personality would involve talking about himself in the third person and...well, he didn't know what else. He'd make it up as he went along.
"Don't sit up too fast, mister Norman," said a nurse, standing over his bed. A SEXY NURSE!? He couldn't quite tell. His vision was blurred. Why was is vision blurred? Something had slammed into his back. A car, he though. He'd been going to see the cow and had been hitten...hit, by a car. So he was in hospital. That was logical. But how did the nurse know his real surname?
"It's NOSE! Johnny Nose...Johnny The Fuck Nose! No, I'm not...Johnny's not a fucknose! Don't you go telling people that Johnny's a fucknose! It's just...Johnny's name is Nose. Johnny Nose. Tell the people Johnny's name is Johnny Nose. Not the other."
"I'll...I'll do that. Umm, there's someone here who wants to see you...maybe not for the best right now though, you just rest up and..."
"Someone to see me...Johnny Nose? SOMEONE TO SEE MY JOHNNY NOSE? MY PRECIOUS NICE PRECIOUS! GOLLUM, GOLLUM! My back hurts."
"You were hit by a car, Johnny."
"What did I ever do to the car?"
"We need to do tests on you..."
"WANT TO SEE MY VISITOR! SEND HIM IN!"
"It's a she..."
"OH MY FUCKING GOD IS IT SHAKIRA? She's wanted to ride my sex stick for years! I wish my vision wasn't blurred!"
"Blurred vision?"
"Uhh...a joke. I'm fine. Everybody's fine, now. How are you?"
"If you have blurred vision you need to tell me..."
"FUCKING VISITOR WANT...ME DO...FUCKING VISITOR...SEND HER IN...NAKED! IF I CAN'T SEE I'LL FEEL MY WAY AROUND HER! HAHA!"
"This isn't a..."
"Is he okay?" Another voice. Another figure stepped in. Who was it!? Couldn't be wheelchair girl, what was her name again? Couldn't be her, wasn't in a wheelchair. Her figure was quite nice. Johnny wondered if he could still get an erection after his accident. He tried really hard.
"WHO'S THERE?" he shouted, his penis still soft.
"Hey Johnny," she said, stepping closer. "It's me, your cousin Susan. Remember me?"
"SUSAN! I WANT TO HUMP YOU!"
"The accident, it might have effected his personality," said the nurse.
"No," said Susan. "He's always been like this."
"How did you know I was here, sweetnips?"
"I was visiting a friend, saw you getting wheeled in. Haven't seen you for years, but I knew it was you."
"A friend? DOES SHE HAVE HERPES?"
"No, she has cancer."
"Oh. SLUT!"
"Johnny...do you want me to call your parents?"
No! NO! "Yes," said Johnny, then fell asleep.
