CaptainWacky
I want to smell dark matter
fsagjhjhfgjhgjllgjl fFUFksfkfgF LOOOOOONG DRAWN OUT MOMENT ONE MOMET ONE FUCKING REPEATING MOMENT THAT LASTS FOREVER BUT IS OVER IN AN INSTANT
________________________________-
"Go on Sam, ask Rosie for a dance!" said Frodo, cheerfully.
"I think I'll just have another ale," said Sam, knowing it would be a bad idea for him to dance, or rather attempt to dance, with Rosie Cotton. But Frodo pushed him right into beautiful farmer's daughter!
"Hallo, Sam!" said Rosie, beaming. He felt sick. He tried his hardest, he really did, he tried to dance normally, like everyone else. For a few seconds he managed it. Then it started to go wrong, like it always did. "Why are you dancing like that?" asked Rosie, confused.
"I'm sorry!" said Sam, looking down at her breasts. He thought of quickly looking away, but then thought that if he did so it would be really obviously to Rosie that he had been perving at her. So instead he stared at her huge hobbit tits for a good fifteen seconds.
"Stop staring at my tits!" said Rosie, angry.
"Sorry, sorry!" said Sam, bizarrely reaching both hands out and grabbing a hold of Rosie's breasts. "I didn't mean to do that!" he said. And he really didn't. It was just that Samwise Gamgee always managed to find a way to do the wrong thing.
"FILTHY GARDENER!" said Rosei, slapping Sam hard in the face. He stumbled backwards and tripped over a little hobbit child, crashing back into a food table.
"Sam's drunk again!" shouted old Bilbo Baggins, and everyone laughed. Merry and Pippin pointed and laughed, hooting and hollering. Sam wanted to roll up underneath the table and never come out. He wanted to die.
"Get up, you fool!" said Frodo, shaking his head in disappointment. But Sam wouldn't stand. Frodo shrugged and walked away. Finally Sam got up...and fell again right away. One of the hobbit children had tied his shoelaces together!
"FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK!" roared Sam. He had banged his head when he fell the second time and was bleeding. "FUCKING BRATS! BRIGANDS!" Everyone stopped dancing and looked at Sam. He quickly untied his shoeles then grabbed a hold of the nearest hobbit child and started shaking it.
"OY, stop that!" said Ted Sandyman, the miller's son. "You'll hurt the lad!"
"FUCK YOU, SANDYMAN!" said Sam, shaking the crying child all the harder, a red rage had taken Sam and there was no reasoning with him.
"Let him go, boy," said old Bilbo, putting a hand on Sam's shoulder.
"RRRRAAAARRRGH!" screamed Samwise, sick of being talked down to. All his life they'd laughed at him, patronised him, treated him like a fool...he swung the tiny hobbit child wildly, as hard as he could. It smashed against Bilbo's skull. Sam let go of the child and it feel to the ground, on top of Bilbo. There was blood coming from Bilbo's skull and he wasn't moving. All the other hobbits were too stunned to even move. Such violence had never been seen in the Shire before.
Sam ran. It was all he could think to do. He pushed aside the hobbits in his way. A few belatedly made a grab for him, but Sam was well on his way out of the Party Field. He ran down Bagshot Row, over the bridge and along Bywater Road, without looking back once. Tears were in his eyes. Yet part of him felt happy. He'd never felt so alive before in his short, pathetic life.
He cut into the woods and kept running and running until he finally collapsed. He lay on the soft earth, laughing to himself crazily. "Killed Bilbo! Killed a child. I KILLED A CHILD!" he murmered to himself, though he did not actually know if Bilbo or the child were dead. "I SHOULD HAVE KILLED THEM ALL, AHAHAHAAH! NO! NOOOO! IT WAS WRONG! IT WAS FOLLY! WHAT HAVE I DONE! WHAT THE FUCK HAVE I DON!" He began punching himself, harder and harder. He punched the cut that had been made when he banged his head after his laces had been tied together. He got a good flow of blood going.
It was then that the fox walked over.
"Unusual to see a hobbit out this later, camping in the wild!" said the fox. Normally Sam would be surprised that a fox could talk at all, but this was not a normal night.
"I'M NOT FUCKING CAMPING!" said Sam. "I JUST KILLED TWO PEOPLE!"
"Well, you hobbits kills animals all the time, for food!" said the wise fox. "Just like I do. It's no different."
"I killed PEOPLE you fool!" said Sam. "HOBBIT PEOPLE!"
"Aye, and I killed one of my cubs the other day because he was gay and beat my wife to within an inch of her life for bearing me such an abomination!" said the fox. "And I loved every moment of it! Get over it! Killing is fun!"
Sam clamly grabbed the fox around the neck and twisted, breaking its neck. He held the fox's lifeless body in his hands. And it was, indeed, fun.
"You're right," said Sam. "You're so right..."
Sam murdered 13 hobbits, men and women, young and old, he didn't care who, and raped four women including Rosie before he was finally stoned to death by Merry and Pippin. His body was put in a gibbet for the sport of crows.
_________________________________-
LIFE IS POINTLESS LOL FUCKING DIE
________________________________-
"Go on Sam, ask Rosie for a dance!" said Frodo, cheerfully.
"I think I'll just have another ale," said Sam, knowing it would be a bad idea for him to dance, or rather attempt to dance, with Rosie Cotton. But Frodo pushed him right into beautiful farmer's daughter!
"Hallo, Sam!" said Rosie, beaming. He felt sick. He tried his hardest, he really did, he tried to dance normally, like everyone else. For a few seconds he managed it. Then it started to go wrong, like it always did. "Why are you dancing like that?" asked Rosie, confused.
"I'm sorry!" said Sam, looking down at her breasts. He thought of quickly looking away, but then thought that if he did so it would be really obviously to Rosie that he had been perving at her. So instead he stared at her huge hobbit tits for a good fifteen seconds.
"Stop staring at my tits!" said Rosie, angry.
"Sorry, sorry!" said Sam, bizarrely reaching both hands out and grabbing a hold of Rosie's breasts. "I didn't mean to do that!" he said. And he really didn't. It was just that Samwise Gamgee always managed to find a way to do the wrong thing.
"FILTHY GARDENER!" said Rosei, slapping Sam hard in the face. He stumbled backwards and tripped over a little hobbit child, crashing back into a food table.
"Sam's drunk again!" shouted old Bilbo Baggins, and everyone laughed. Merry and Pippin pointed and laughed, hooting and hollering. Sam wanted to roll up underneath the table and never come out. He wanted to die.
"Get up, you fool!" said Frodo, shaking his head in disappointment. But Sam wouldn't stand. Frodo shrugged and walked away. Finally Sam got up...and fell again right away. One of the hobbit children had tied his shoelaces together!
"FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK!" roared Sam. He had banged his head when he fell the second time and was bleeding. "FUCKING BRATS! BRIGANDS!" Everyone stopped dancing and looked at Sam. He quickly untied his shoeles then grabbed a hold of the nearest hobbit child and started shaking it.
"OY, stop that!" said Ted Sandyman, the miller's son. "You'll hurt the lad!"
"FUCK YOU, SANDYMAN!" said Sam, shaking the crying child all the harder, a red rage had taken Sam and there was no reasoning with him.
"Let him go, boy," said old Bilbo, putting a hand on Sam's shoulder.
"RRRRAAAARRRGH!" screamed Samwise, sick of being talked down to. All his life they'd laughed at him, patronised him, treated him like a fool...he swung the tiny hobbit child wildly, as hard as he could. It smashed against Bilbo's skull. Sam let go of the child and it feel to the ground, on top of Bilbo. There was blood coming from Bilbo's skull and he wasn't moving. All the other hobbits were too stunned to even move. Such violence had never been seen in the Shire before.
Sam ran. It was all he could think to do. He pushed aside the hobbits in his way. A few belatedly made a grab for him, but Sam was well on his way out of the Party Field. He ran down Bagshot Row, over the bridge and along Bywater Road, without looking back once. Tears were in his eyes. Yet part of him felt happy. He'd never felt so alive before in his short, pathetic life.
He cut into the woods and kept running and running until he finally collapsed. He lay on the soft earth, laughing to himself crazily. "Killed Bilbo! Killed a child. I KILLED A CHILD!" he murmered to himself, though he did not actually know if Bilbo or the child were dead. "I SHOULD HAVE KILLED THEM ALL, AHAHAHAAH! NO! NOOOO! IT WAS WRONG! IT WAS FOLLY! WHAT HAVE I DONE! WHAT THE FUCK HAVE I DON!" He began punching himself, harder and harder. He punched the cut that had been made when he banged his head after his laces had been tied together. He got a good flow of blood going.
It was then that the fox walked over.
"Unusual to see a hobbit out this later, camping in the wild!" said the fox. Normally Sam would be surprised that a fox could talk at all, but this was not a normal night.
"I'M NOT FUCKING CAMPING!" said Sam. "I JUST KILLED TWO PEOPLE!"
"Well, you hobbits kills animals all the time, for food!" said the wise fox. "Just like I do. It's no different."
"I killed PEOPLE you fool!" said Sam. "HOBBIT PEOPLE!"
"Aye, and I killed one of my cubs the other day because he was gay and beat my wife to within an inch of her life for bearing me such an abomination!" said the fox. "And I loved every moment of it! Get over it! Killing is fun!"
Sam clamly grabbed the fox around the neck and twisted, breaking its neck. He held the fox's lifeless body in his hands. And it was, indeed, fun.
"You're right," said Sam. "You're so right..."
Sam murdered 13 hobbits, men and women, young and old, he didn't care who, and raped four women including Rosie before he was finally stoned to death by Merry and Pippin. His body was put in a gibbet for the sport of crows.
_________________________________-
LIFE IS POINTLESS LOL FUCKING DIE