CaptainWacky
I want to smell dark matter
barely here ting
yeah it's hard to type with the grew text on black
but not toob ad
i can see it
I guess
maybe i'm going blind
never going to get my eyes tested though
that would mean itneractign with a peosrn lol
i'd say something wrong and they'ld give me the wrong glasses
and I'd have to wear them because i wouldn't want to go back
classic frank horse adventure!
anyway
here's some random musings from...Billy Fakename
yes
all of this is written from the point of view of Billy Fakename
take it away you
_________________________
I hate it when I become aware of my body. It always happens after I forget about my body. That has to happen first. I have to exist as pure thought. I don't mean in some kind of spiritual way. I'll just be sitting there (or here, I only ever sit there or here) and I'll zone out. I'll just forget I exist. Then I'll come back. And I'll be in my body. And holy shit that's scary. How can I be this? This...flesh. Bones. Organs. Other stuff. You know? It's so small. What if my heart just stopped beating right now? It could happen. I feelt it jump. It jumps when I eat cheese. How pathetic is that? Eating chese nearly kills me. Or it doesn't matter, really, how close i am to die, becajuse I will die. This is an expiring body. I can feel that. It's all I can feel. I beat my chest with my fist to keep my heart beating. It's worked so far. I've never died before so that means I won't die now. Right? Hahaa. No, I'm too aware for that. I only have to die once. And it's happening as I think. And I'm not a creature of pure thought. I'm not. When I zoned out there, I was nothing. Completely gone. I'm only back now because my brain is generating the thoguht prcoess which identifies itself as me. That thought process is all there is. It can't exist outside my brain because it's created by my brain. My pathetic little brain. So small, in my pathetic little skull. I tap my head. that's the boundary. That's all I am. I'm in there. That's the universe to me. Nothing outside of it is relevant. That's the totality of me, in there. I keep tapping. TAP TAP TAP. Could be destroyed so easily.. And I wouldn't know becasue there wouldn't be a me to know. Haha. After this Is usually punch my face. Then I think about how a cure for death will be discovered in my lifetime (it won't be) and finally the panic ends. Then later I'll think about it more "rationally" and decide that I should cure death myself, by convicing everyone to work together to cure death. Which I'll never do. And there's no point posting about it on the internet again because it never make s adifference. But what else is ther eto do. gfjaisdshfdsh tals then the cycle repeats and seriously it's hard to read this with the board's new colours please fix it. And one day I'll die without knowing and there will be no finality. And even if there was finality I wouldn't remember it after I die anway! So yeah, it's no wonder I panic when I become aware of my body.
__________________________________________
wow it's werid that Billy Fakename is having the same problem reading this that I am!
so yeah
that's abou tit
no really
stop reading now
you're eating up mometns of your life reading this
MOMENTS OF YOUR ONE AN DONLY LIFE WOOOOOOO SCARY
yeah
I don't know how to think
yeah it's hard to type with the grew text on black
but not toob ad
i can see it
I guess
maybe i'm going blind
never going to get my eyes tested though
that would mean itneractign with a peosrn lol
i'd say something wrong and they'ld give me the wrong glasses
and I'd have to wear them because i wouldn't want to go back
classic frank horse adventure!
anyway
here's some random musings from...Billy Fakename
yes
all of this is written from the point of view of Billy Fakename
take it away you
_________________________
I hate it when I become aware of my body. It always happens after I forget about my body. That has to happen first. I have to exist as pure thought. I don't mean in some kind of spiritual way. I'll just be sitting there (or here, I only ever sit there or here) and I'll zone out. I'll just forget I exist. Then I'll come back. And I'll be in my body. And holy shit that's scary. How can I be this? This...flesh. Bones. Organs. Other stuff. You know? It's so small. What if my heart just stopped beating right now? It could happen. I feelt it jump. It jumps when I eat cheese. How pathetic is that? Eating chese nearly kills me. Or it doesn't matter, really, how close i am to die, becajuse I will die. This is an expiring body. I can feel that. It's all I can feel. I beat my chest with my fist to keep my heart beating. It's worked so far. I've never died before so that means I won't die now. Right? Hahaa. No, I'm too aware for that. I only have to die once. And it's happening as I think. And I'm not a creature of pure thought. I'm not. When I zoned out there, I was nothing. Completely gone. I'm only back now because my brain is generating the thoguht prcoess which identifies itself as me. That thought process is all there is. It can't exist outside my brain because it's created by my brain. My pathetic little brain. So small, in my pathetic little skull. I tap my head. that's the boundary. That's all I am. I'm in there. That's the universe to me. Nothing outside of it is relevant. That's the totality of me, in there. I keep tapping. TAP TAP TAP. Could be destroyed so easily.. And I wouldn't know becasue there wouldn't be a me to know. Haha. After this Is usually punch my face. Then I think about how a cure for death will be discovered in my lifetime (it won't be) and finally the panic ends. Then later I'll think about it more "rationally" and decide that I should cure death myself, by convicing everyone to work together to cure death. Which I'll never do. And there's no point posting about it on the internet again because it never make s adifference. But what else is ther eto do. gfjaisdshfdsh tals then the cycle repeats and seriously it's hard to read this with the board's new colours please fix it. And one day I'll die without knowing and there will be no finality. And even if there was finality I wouldn't remember it after I die anway! So yeah, it's no wonder I panic when I become aware of my body.
__________________________________________
wow it's werid that Billy Fakename is having the same problem reading this that I am!
so yeah
that's abou tit
no really
stop reading now
you're eating up mometns of your life reading this
MOMENTS OF YOUR ONE AN DONLY LIFE WOOOOOOO SCARY
yeah
I don't know how to think