CaptainWacky
I want to smell dark matter
"So what are we going to do?" asked Demi Lovato. "How are we going to stop Squidonna?"
"We?" said Taylor Swift with disgust, stroking Olivia Benson to keep herself calm. "You seriously think I'm going to work with him?"
"Please, we need to work together if we have any hope of stopping her," said the robot.
"Oy, come on, mate, you were a right bellend to Taylor, we can't trust you!" said Russell Brand.
"Russell Brand, I have always been a fan of your work," said the robot.
"Oh, Taylor, I think we can trust him," said Russell, instantly. "As geoicidal robots go, he ain't 'alf bad, m'lud!"
"And how do I know if we stop the Squidonna you won't just try to destroy the world in some other way?" asked Taylor.
"Because the Squidonna was right," said the robot. "I'm living in a different timeline now. A timeline of my own creation. I was a fool. I ignored the perils of time travel. Right from the stat I was wrong to bed Madonna. To develop...feelings for her. She was not supposed to take the Squid God inside of her. Even if she was stopped...perhaps the future has already been changed. And now that Rihanna knows the truth. Perhaps..."
"I don't know what the fuck you're even talking about," admitted Demi Lovato.
"I'll believe you for now," said Taylor. "But when this is done, when we kill Squidonna...I won't guarantee that I won't just murder you as well."
"I understand," said the robot.
"That were kind of hot!" said Russell.
"Is there anyone else we can recruit to battle the Squidonna?" asked Taylor. "The five of us alone may not be enough..."
"I murdered Mariah Carey," confessed the robot. Everyone shrugged.
"What about Lorde?" asked Demi.
"She returned to her home planet," said the robot.
"Lorde was an alien?" asked Taylor. But she didn't wait for an answer. It made sense. "What about Rihanna? Even with her problems she'll still a great fighter..."
"No," said the Robot. "I refuse to work with that maniac."
"You wouldn't exist without her!" said Taylor. "You evolved from her!"
"My existence is an abomination," said the robot.
"How about Kanye?" asked Russell. Everyone shuddered, even Olivia Benson. "Only joking!" he said.
"What about Kristen Stewart?" asked Taylor. "I've always wanted to fuck her brains out."
"Me too," admitted Demi Lovato.
"I already have!" said Russell. "Wait, no. I just wanked over her."
"Let us find thise Kristen Stewart," said the robot. "Where is she likely to be?"
"Her secret lesbian base underneath the sea," said Taylor.
"Ah, makes sense," said the robot.
"We?" said Taylor Swift with disgust, stroking Olivia Benson to keep herself calm. "You seriously think I'm going to work with him?"
"Please, we need to work together if we have any hope of stopping her," said the robot.
"Oy, come on, mate, you were a right bellend to Taylor, we can't trust you!" said Russell Brand.
"Russell Brand, I have always been a fan of your work," said the robot.
"Oh, Taylor, I think we can trust him," said Russell, instantly. "As geoicidal robots go, he ain't 'alf bad, m'lud!"
"And how do I know if we stop the Squidonna you won't just try to destroy the world in some other way?" asked Taylor.
"Because the Squidonna was right," said the robot. "I'm living in a different timeline now. A timeline of my own creation. I was a fool. I ignored the perils of time travel. Right from the stat I was wrong to bed Madonna. To develop...feelings for her. She was not supposed to take the Squid God inside of her. Even if she was stopped...perhaps the future has already been changed. And now that Rihanna knows the truth. Perhaps..."
"I don't know what the fuck you're even talking about," admitted Demi Lovato.
"I'll believe you for now," said Taylor. "But when this is done, when we kill Squidonna...I won't guarantee that I won't just murder you as well."
"I understand," said the robot.
"That were kind of hot!" said Russell.
"Is there anyone else we can recruit to battle the Squidonna?" asked Taylor. "The five of us alone may not be enough..."
"I murdered Mariah Carey," confessed the robot. Everyone shrugged.
"What about Lorde?" asked Demi.
"She returned to her home planet," said the robot.
"Lorde was an alien?" asked Taylor. But she didn't wait for an answer. It made sense. "What about Rihanna? Even with her problems she'll still a great fighter..."
"No," said the Robot. "I refuse to work with that maniac."
"You wouldn't exist without her!" said Taylor. "You evolved from her!"
"My existence is an abomination," said the robot.
"How about Kanye?" asked Russell. Everyone shuddered, even Olivia Benson. "Only joking!" he said.
"What about Kristen Stewart?" asked Taylor. "I've always wanted to fuck her brains out."
"Me too," admitted Demi Lovato.
"I already have!" said Russell. "Wait, no. I just wanked over her."
"Let us find thise Kristen Stewart," said the robot. "Where is she likely to be?"
"Her secret lesbian base underneath the sea," said Taylor.
"Ah, makes sense," said the robot.