CaptainWacky
I want to smell dark matter
by Dave Meltzer
[email protected]
Welcome to our live coverage of tonight's Vengeance PPV from the Bobcats Arena in Charlotte. We're looking for your thoughts on this show as well as last night's UFN show. We're looking for a thumbs up, thumbs down or thumbs in the middle on both shows along with a best and worst match from each show to [email protected]
Kurt Angle vs. Randy Orton will be opening the show. Orton won the opener clean with an RKO after Angle's throat hit the unpadded turnbuckle. I expected this result, but it was the wrong result because if you give a guy a shooter gimmick, he can't lose clean two weeks later. Good opener, but not the level of match you'd expect from these two.
Vince was going nuts spilling his guts to a kid in a wheelchair. Vince supposedly threw the kid down the stairs. Now Coachman arrived holding a penis pump. Coachman told him the kid in a wheelchair was brought by him. The attempt at humor here missed badly.
Umaga vs. Eugene was next. Jim Duggan, Doink the Clown and Kamala are all in Eugene's corner. Umaga won quickly with the Samoan Spike. He then laid out Duggan and Doink. He wanted to lay out Kamala but Armando pulled Umaga away. Can't wait.
Mick Foley was reading the stuff in Flair's book about him.
Flair vs. Foley in 2/3 falls is up now. Flair won the first fall with an inside cradle. Foley was DQ'd in the second fall for using a garbage can. Post-match saw Foley pull out a barbed wire bat and destroyed Flair with it. Flair bled a genuine gusher. It was more an angle to keep the program going like at Arena Mexico as opposed too trying to do any kind of a good match. Match was nothing special but the angle was strong and got legit heat.
Carlito vs. Johnny Nitro vs. Shelton Benjamin for the IC title. Torrie Wilson showed up in a bikini. Torrie asked Carlito to hold her puppies, of course Wilson pulled out 2 tiny dogs. Wilson and Maria were putting baby oil all over each other. Carlito was mad because his music played and he had to stop watching.
Nitro won the title when Carlito used the back cracker on Benjamin, but Nitro pulled Carlito out of the ring and jumped on Benjamin and got the pin. This was like a bad TNA X Division match in that a lot of the wrestling was badly timed and didn't look good, but there were a few great athletic spots. The big pop was Nitro German suplexing Benjamin, who was standing on the top rope and suplexing Carlito all in the same move. Carlito did more flying than he's ever done since leaving Puerto Rico. Because WWE fans haven't seen the TNA tower of doom spot, it came off as a much better match on this show than it would have on a TNA show.
Vince is waiting for everyone to leave so he can try out the penis pump. But it was a trick, as when Vince opened it, it sprayed Muta green mist in his eyes.
RVD vs. Edge is next up. They can't even pretend they are the main event. This breaks the unwritten company rule that even when the main event isn't the title match, you still put the title match last. Well, everyone knows the real main event on this show is DX. Edge went to spear Van Dam into a chair, but Van Dam moved and Edge crashed into the chair held by Lita. Van Dam did the frog splash to retain the title. ECW had to win at least one of the three matches, although I was surprised it was this one. Best match so far tonight.
Heyman did a promo with the ECW guys announcing that there will be an equal number of WWE job guys as lumberjacks in the Cena match.
Glen Kane vs. Drew Kane is up now. Drew won clean with a choke slam. The match wasn't awful, but this angle is so not over. Crowd ws dead the entire match and just wanted it over.
John Cena vs. Sabu in a lumberjack match is up next. Pretty wild scene. Cena gave Sabu an FU over the top rope through a table. Sabu had a bad landing. Viscera and Snitsky threw Sabu in and Cena put the STFU on him and Sabu tapped out. They put over that few people had ever made Sabu tap. The Raw job crew were put over the ECW biggest star screw on the outside. It was kept short and it worked.
RVD put over Cena and said he admired him. RVD said he'd put the belt up against Cena tomorrow night on Raw. They shook hands on it.
DX vs. Spirit Squad 2 on 5 is the main event. Exact match you'd expect. Very entertaining overall. HHH used the pedigree on Kenny and Michaels superkicked Mikey. They laid everyone else out, rolled them out of the ring and left Mitch in. They finsihed by shoving Mitch's face into HHH's ass. Yes, if you thought you'd seen enough male ass to last a lifetime, we're just beginning the summer of Male Asses on Raw. At least they've got the gay male demo covered for the next two months.
sghshj
