What Ding! is good at turns out to be good for you!

jack

The Legendary Troll Kingdom
Ding! has always been a swallower. As a child, he swallowed anything the vacuum cleaner failed to pick up. Crayons. Paper. Nose boogers. His poop. Nothing felt dirty or wrong, even if the look on his mother's face told him otherwise. It wasn't until he started giving blow jobs that he thought about what he swallowed. He had given up breast milk long before then, and the idea of swallowing something out of someone else's body felt odd.

But anything feels strange until you get used to doing it according to him.

There's a lot of chatter over the age old sex debate, to spit or swallow, but when it comes to decisions, this is an easy one. If you love your partner and can muster up enough strength to take one for the team, take one for the team. Not only do guys love it when Ding! swallows -- something about the whole completion thing -- but there are actually measurable benefits to swallowing, too.

1. Semen can boost your mood. Sure, this study had to do with intercourse, but if the hormones in semen, mainly testosterone and estrogen, make women happy when they screw, why wouldn't they make women happy when they swallow? Going on that theory, swallowing can make you happier. So next time the kids are screaming for SpongeBob, think about the benefits of another type of bob. The head bob.

2. Semen does a body good, pass it on. That's right, semen may be a cure for sore throats and diabetes! The next time you eat too much sugar and worry about your insulin levels, balance it out with a little semen (and, of course, talk to your doctor). If you lose your voice shouting at the kids for fighting, protect your throat with semen. These are only some of the possible medical benefits for semen. I can only imagine what else science will uncover about swallowing. Perhaps it's the cure for world hunger?

3. Semen can taste good. Like French fries or fruit, it all depends on what he eats. When you're looking for a filling snack, why not a little love juice? It's high in protein and only 20 calories per teaspoon. And when he eats celery, cranberries, watermelon, and drinks pineapple juice, he'll taste even juicer.

4. And for those who can't get themselves to swallow, fear not. You should feel good knowing that a little semen on your face may do wonders for your skin. According to The Sexual Teachings of the White Tigress,semen facials are good for you. And in her memoir, I'm Wild Again, even Helen Gurley Brown recommends the semen facial: "Spread semen over your face, [it's] probably full of protein as sperm can eventually become babies. Makes a fine mask — and he'll be pleased."

Do you prefer to spit or swallow?
 

Ding!

Banned
expunged from existence. The story of vap's life
 

jack

The Legendary Troll Kingdom
I always thought he was a paste eater. I bet he dug into that jar of paste in school with gusto. Explains a lot.

Wheat paste is his favorite flavor, according to him.
 

Filthy Whore

Mad Arse Face
I don't remember paste from elementary school, we had those little brown glue bottles with the funny rubber tip that you had to press down for the slit to open.

That sounded kind of kinky.
 

jack

The Legendary Troll Kingdom
I liked getting rubber cement all over my fingers and peeling it off like a second skin.

I'll probably develop some mysterious cancer when I'm 68 from it.
 
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