What would you do if you were made out of bread?

[CaptainWacky]

I'd toast myself, to make my body more robust.

 

[whisky]

Fondu.

 

[Cassie]

BATHE IN BUTTER.

 

[Gagh]

Hunt this fucker down and kill it.

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[Eggs Mayonnaise]

I wouls transform into an army of killer croutons.

 

[Mirah]

I agree on the toast and croutons because they don't mold and they last forever! If I were bread I would be gluten free. Just kidding. If I were bread I would be the kind that gets broken on Sunday and handed out with the wine, maybe not. If I were bread I would want to be with Peaunut Butter and Jelly all the time or honey and butter or cinamon and sugar. I would never want to be alone. I would want to be so many great sandwiches, but I would be annoyed when I get soggy and just sit there, so toast is the way.
If I were bread I would want to be in a brown paper bag, not on the shelf in a plastic sack. In fact I want to come right from the oven to your mouth. Wow, that sounds sleezy. But if I were bread that is how it would be.

 

[The Question]

Bread is sleazy by nature. I've never met a slice of bread that wasn't a demented maniacal pervert.

 

[CaptainWacky]

What if you were made of brown bread and could finally understand what bread racism felt like?

 

[Mentalist]

Terrorize the gluten free community.

 

[Cassie]

If I were made of bread, I hope someone would turn me into pudding.

 

[Fuddlemiff]

I hope I would rise to the occasion.

 

[CaptainWacky]

The correct answer was "die almost instantly."

 

[Eggs Mayonnaise]

My hope would be to provide a soft landing for a nice slab of meat LOLOLOMGBBQWFSADFsdf

 

[Dr Dave]

The correct answer was "die almost instantly."

Living in a rainy area, somebody made of bread would not last long here.

 

[Mirah]

I never knew bread could sound so sexy.

 

[headvoid]

I would make myself into soldiers and take over the world.

 

[CaptainWacky]

PC BBC BAN TOAST SOLDIERS FOR FEAR OF ANTI-ISLAM BACKLSASH.

 

[headvoid]

BACKLSASH sounds so much better. Like a sassy dutch person. Hi, I'm Johan Backlsash and I am into minimal techno and dub reggae!

 

[CaptainWacky]

Probably who the BBC want presenting all their shows AS LONG AS HE'S ALSO BLACK, A WOMAN, TRANS, AND HAS NO LEGS!!

 

[headvoid]

We are giving Johan Backlsash quite a back story now. I think he writes a blog about smoothies and has a vegetable plot made out of old tyres. He hates Kale though, and has fallen out with his friend Hans Dottlecom about it.