would you kill an innocent to save your penis?

[CaptainWacky]

Or the famale version of a penis (I don't know what that is)? LET'S SAY evil aliens from the future ordered you to kill an innocent (say, a baby or a cute black kid or something) or else your penis would be cut off. THERE IS NO WAY AROUND THIS. The aliens prepared for every eventuality and demonstrate this fact to you in some way. You MUST either kill an innocent or lose your penis or girlpenis. WHICH WOULD YOU CHOOSE?

 

[The Dork Lord]

I'm very ATTACHED to my penis, and have been trained by the government to kill people...

 

[Yub]

They can take my penis, but they'll never take MY FREEDOM!!

 

[Kitty]

Some would say killin a cute black kid would be a bonus, not an ultimatum.

 

[Eggs Mayonnaise]

You'd have to find an innocent one first (D'OH SORRY I'M A PUNCHLINE ADDICT)

I'm torn. If I didn't have my penis to obsess over anymore, I'd probably channel all that energy into more productive and creative endeavors, and become a much more enriched, enlightened being.

Aw fuck it...zap a baby.

 

[Ilyanna]

Or the famale version of a penis (I don't know what that is)? LET'S SAY evil aliens from the future ordered you to kill an innocent (say, a baby or a cute black kid or something) or else your penis would be cut off. THERE IS NO WAY AROUND THIS. The aliens prepared for every eventuality and demonstrate this fact to you in some way. You MUST either kill an innocent or lose your penis or girlpenis. WHICH WOULD YOU CHOOSE?

*gasp* I would never let anybody take my handbag.

 

[Cassie]

It seems most of the MFers are ATTACHED to their penids or female equivalent.. lol you SHOULD have made the poll public!

 

[Elnidfse]

Id smite thy innocent children in order to preserve mine penis.

 

[CaptainWacky]

I can't believe it...you're all sick...

 

[Shitty Dual]

I would sacrifice my penis to save a human life, but the sexual frustration that would build up from years of being penisless would eventually turn me into a MASS MURDERER irony omg

 

[CaptainWacky]

But at least you'd never become a rapist.

 

[Shitty Dual]

But at least you'd never become a rapist.

True, but becoming an impaler might not be out of the question.

 

[Dr Dave]

Save the penis, save the world.

 

[Yub]

Sacrificing yer penis means you get the option of replacing it with a all new grown in a lab UBER PENIS or a ROBOPENIS


A robopenis is what Luke would have if Vader has gone for his nuts.

 

[Shitty Dual]

Save the penis, save the world.

You'd just need the nads. Stick 'em like a juicebox and world saved.
QED

 

[Shitty Dual]

Sacrificing yer penis means you get the option of replacing it with a all new grown in a lab UBER PENIS or a ROBOPENIS

A robopenis is what Luke would have if Vader has gone for his nuts.

But then Luke would've had to do the same to him in order to "get" that he was turning into an evil machine, and lightsabering through Vader's black-box codpiece might have taken too long.

 

[The Dork Lord]

Sacrificing yer penis means you get the option of replacing it with a all new grown in a lab UBER PENIS or a ROBOPENIS


A robopenis is what Luke would have if Vader has gone for his nuts.

I never considered the UBER/ROBOPENIS option...

But my luck, I'd try and save a few bucks and end up with a cheap Korean knock off penis...

 

[CaptainWacky]

Surely Vader's penis was destroyed on Mustafaar?