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You could meet SCARLETT JOHANSSON!!!!

Or maybe if you just asked nicely?
 
You could tell her that you're dying of cancer and your greatest wish is to touch her boobs, I'm sure she would let you.
 
Or you could pretend to be blind and start touching them becaue "it's how I communicate".
 
You could also pretend to be retarded, but most likely a retarded person couldn't bid on ebay or could they?
 
In America, we keep the retards in small cages and poke them occasionally with sticks to "provide stimuli," so no.
 
"Pre-Approved Bidders only"

Somehow, I think that nobody here can get the "pre-approved status" that's needed to do it. But if you can, jiggle away, I'll cheer when you do it.
 
Woody Allen will end up winning.
 
I wouldn't let Woody Allen touch my boobs with Natalie's hands.
 
I would.
 
Ick.. Woody would be standing there watching, probably doing a running commentary in his annoying voice.
 
fuck scarlett johanson with 10000$ ill buy a 72'' plasma and still have enough money to dip myself in honey and have a gangbang with 40 prostitutes hahahahahaha
 
What about having sex with men instead?
 
Although if Scarlett Johansson REALLY cared about world peace and stuff all she'd have to do is say "Hey if you guys decalre world peace, I'll take off my top."

Then blammo. World peace.
 
Yeah, but all those erections at the same time would cause havok with global warming
 
It would be funny if she had no nipples.
 
EDIT: FUCK WHY DO I KEEP THINKING ONE THREAD IS ANOTHER
 
They look and feel human.

Some are programmed to think they are human.

There are many copies.

And they have a plan.
 
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