"You gonna get another job?"...

Volpone

Zombie Hunter
The joke in the local real estate investment community is that the goal is to make yourself unemployable. I don't know if I can explain the concept, it's kind of a "you had to be there" joke, but the idea is that you have enough income from real estate and enough things going on yourself that you aren't attractive to employers.

That said, I'm wondering if I accomplished this--prematurely. I decided around December that the safe course for now was to get a new part-time job. Nothing fancy, nothing demanding, just a little extra pocket money every week while I look for my next rental property. A long time ago, I did supermarket "reset" work--rearranging product displays to reflect new and cancelled items. Did it for quite a few years and got promoted to designing resets. Then our client that I supported did a merger and wound up using a different vendor. I didn't want to take the ballbusting commute to the company office--and they didn't really have any work for me there anyway--so I (with my boss' permission) stayed with the same customer and got hired by their new vendor. But it sucked and by that point I'd decided Portland was doomed, so I quit and moved out to Louisville. Well I kind of enjoyed the reset work. It was about instilling order. At the start of the night they'd give you a diagram and if, by morning, the shelves looked like the diagram, you'd done your job (same with designing resets, only they aren't hiring any of those around here right now) so I zapped off an application to my old boss. Never heard back from them after the "Great! Thanks for your application! We'll be reaching out to soon." the HRBot sent. Only think I can figure is, they had a question, "is there any reason you might have to miss work" and I answered it "yes" because duh, cars break down, people get sick, etc. But I wonder if that just redlined me as "difficult and unreliable".

So fairly recently I applied for similar work with one of the big hardware chains. I'd actually designed outdoor lighting displays for them in my old job, but that's another story. This one, they had one of those personality quizzes: "What would you do if..." "Are you..." "If we talked to your most recent manager..." It's possible that I don't have the personality to be a company drone anymore (it's possible I never did, but that's another story).

Well, it's time to walk The Dog and she's starting to do her stealth forlorn whimpers on the bed so I guess I'll bang that out. Still no desirable houses for sale at a point I'm willing to pay so I guess when I get home I'll zap off an application to the OTHER big hardware chain and see if that goes anywhere. Once that's done, I should get going on setting up my own storage rental, since Neighbor has been a huge disappointment.
 

Volpone

Zombie Hunter
Fucking USAA is really starting to piss me off. I asked for an appraiser so I wouldn't have to fight with their stupid claim submission app but it turns out that the appraiser was just going to make me take photos anyway so I was like "fuck it, if I've got to electronically submit photos, I'll just deal with the stupid app" and got it done. So this evening the appraiser sends me an e-mail and is like "we still need photos of the steering wheel, dashboard, headliner, driver's trim panel, and front and rear carpet and seats." Well honey, then you'd better either add those to the app or drive down here and take them yourself, because I submitted everything the app asked for.

I hate the idea of having to break from them. My business credit card is through them. But I think once these claims are settled I'm done. I think I said, there's tons of stuff online about how USAA has really gone downhill.
 

Volpone

Zombie Hunter
My ability to cope with Life keeps diminishing. Walking The Dog is already an exhausting chore. Managed to step in dog poop. Because dogs like to meander around places where other dogs have pooped, so this is a fairly common thing. Had to pick up my dog's poop, which she thoughtfully deposited in some fairly tall grass, so it was a pain in the ass to get it all. Then she managed to go fuck around by another dog's yard, pissing him off to the point where he really wanted to jump the fence. Then I didn't turn for home when I should've and we encountered a little tan male dog with no collar. Of course he then followed us home and all attempts to chase him off failed so now he's out in my front yard, where my dog periodically barks at him through the window. I have things I should be doing right now, but instead I just want to go back to bed. I'm exhausted from just trying to stay alive for an hour.
 

Volpone

Zombie Hunter
Well shit. Stray cat laying in the ditch by my neighbor. Found it because of the buzzards. Decided I'd better text and see if it was one of her barn cats. It wasn't, but she apparently thinks I disposed of the body. And the buzzards must've decided it was too fresh. So now I've got to decide if I want to go deal with that or not.
 

Volpone

Zombie Hunter
So yeah. Unpleasant tasks. I've decided I really don't like being a landlord. But I'm too old and ugly and male to be a prostitute and nothing else cash flows the way renting space does. Renting storage space through a third party has been a bust, so I'm working on doing it myself. Or avoiding working on doing it. Checked with insurance (before all my recent insurance claim headaches) and spend a couple days failing to find contracts from when I rented storage space as I was leaving Oregon. Yesterday I just bit the bullet and started on a rental contract before dinner. Then I got a call from my time-wasting (but good) friend. What would be a good subject for a persuasive paper for his daughter to write? He had a few ideas but wanted to know what I thought. That managed to kill my momentum and run out the clock before dinner. So today I have "all day" to work on it. Of course I haven't done anything and am seriously considering whether burying a dead stray cat might be more pleasant. Ah well, I guess I'd better get to it. In the next hour or so, The Dog will start pestering me to go for a walk.

TRASH! I have to take out trash! Tomorrow's trash day. And I kind of hate the idea of throwing a dead cat in the trash, but it would solve a problem quickly and easily. Probably should do it at night though.
 

Volpone

Zombie Hunter
USAA is a total shit-show. :( Out walking my dog today and get a text, asking the mileage on my car (I suspect the photo of the odometer I took didn't turn out). Go get that and text it back and get online to find a reply to an e-mail I sent 2 days ago, explaining that I still need to go out and take a half dozen photos of my car's interior. So when I get confirmation back from the text on the mileage, I ask them about the photos and they say it isn't necessary.

Then, as I'm getting ready to work on this storage rental contract, I see that I got an e-mail that my auto claim was approved and that a check has been cut to ETF to my bank account. Next I go on their Website to check the claim status and it says to go schedule a body shop and that I'm only responsible for the deductible while USAA will handle the rest. Really? So you're going to send me the money to fix it and then you're also going to pay the body shop yourselves?

So tired. I hate having to get a new insurance company at this point, but it looks like I really need to. Too bad. Used to be a great company.
 

Volpone

Zombie Hunter
If I were doing this for money, I'd break this into about 4 different articles, but since this is just a place for me to get my thoughts out there, I'm just going to roll it all up into one post (unless I change my mind).

First off, I'll touch on this whole transgender thing that is going on right now. Back when I was in my late teens and early 20s, I said that if I'd been born a woman I'd have made someone a really great wife. I like to stay home. I like to cook. I like a clean house. I used to sew and do ironing. But a lot of that falls by the wayside since I also need to bring in the money too. As I was considering writing about this I decided to look for one of those online quizzes that were so big a few years back: Do I have a masculine or feminine personality? On the Meyers-Briggs, I consistently test as an introvert, but not extremely introverted. I'm close to the centerline. The result of the test called me "androgynous" although it was about 57 masculine/43 feminine (Or maybe 53/47?) That said, it is what it is. When I thought about how I might be happier as a woman, that was just an academic exercise. I am NOT a woman. I'm a man. So I have to figure out how to be as happy as I can be as a man. And it is almost certain I'd be far more unhappy if I decided I was a woman and tried to force that. That is my personal belief.

***

Another thing I wrestle with is: Do I fear failure, or do I fear success? The argument is that I know failure. I'm comfortable with failure. I know what to do when I fail. When I succeed, then I need to figure out what to do next. The reality is that this is BS. I fear failure. How do I know this? I decided that I should just rent out storage space myself instead of using a Web 3rd party for it. So I need to make a sign and do up a contract for customers. I also needed to mow the lawn. So the first chance I had...I mowed the lawn. Why? Because it's hard to fail at mowing the lawn. At the end of the day, if the grass is short, you've succeeded. Say I make up a rental contract and make a sign and put it out by the road. What do I do next if no one calls? (Although as I type this, I realize I have more work if someone DOES call too, so maybe I fear...uncertainty? I'm not sure.)

***

Coming back to the topic of the thread, I recently bit the bullet and decided I needed to get at least a part time job as a buffer against the unexpected (like storm damage and fender benders and medical bills). Applied with a company I worked for for several years. Figured it would be an easy deal. Never heard back from them. Applied to do similar work for one of the big hardware chains--that I'd actually done some contracted work for years ago. Never heard back from them. Finally, I applied with the other big hardware chain for some work that I wasn't thrilled about and wasn't particularly qualified for. Heard back immediately about coming in for an interview. Did the interview and got offered a job. Very quick and very easy. I'm actually not terribly thrilled. I really "don't think I want another job." But I *do* want enough money to be able to do the things I want to do, so I guess I'll see where this goes.

***

Finally, "losing my religion," to steal a cool song title. I feel bad to say it, but recent years have made me not the Christian I used to be. I used to always help everyone and do my duty. I used to give to charity and give something up for Lent and go to church. Spending Fat Tuesday starved and miserable and getting a colonoscopy, having my dog--and 3 months later--my cat of 10 years die just after donating a decent chunk of change to charity and then consistently failing to catch the break I need on real estate has moved me from "donate to charities and karma will reward you to" "OK, give me some breaks and then I'll give to charity." And church, I can alter my schedule one day a week and wait on breakfast, coffee, and catching up on current events before walking my dog or I can go someplace where someone who isn't as smart as me tells me the same stories I've heard for a half century and then does a bad job explaining what you're supposed to be getting from it and eat some bread and wine and shake some people's hands. Not a very compelling case. Really, the most exciting argument for church is there's a great Asian buffet near the church and it is an excuse to go to brunch there once a week. But I don't really know if I have that kind of money to blow these days.

The other thing is the whole "Good Samaritan" thing. Years and years ago, I learned that I was motivated by helping people and solving problems. More recently, though, I've learned that some people, you can't solve their problems. All you can do is assume the responsibility of their problems, freeing them up to go find new exciting problems to get into. So I've stopped helping people and solving problems. The kicker was walking The Dog tonight. On the way home she wanted to duck under a bridge. Laying out on a hillside was a hobo who would periodically writhe around. I quickly steered The Dog away from him and went on my way. Not my problem. He looked like a hobo. Clues indicated he was a hobo. But what if he wasn't? What if he genuinely needed help for some reason? What if, when I walk The Dog tomorrow, he is still there but not periodically writhing around? Is it my fault he died then? Do I call it in? Or do I just leave him laying there for rot and coyotes and buzzards until someone else calls it in? Do I do the Kitty Genovese "not my problem?" It's sad that I've come to this.

On a mostly unrelated note, yesterday I had to bury a stray cat that got hit by a car. But before that I had to check with a neighbor to make sure it wasn't his cat (it wasn't, in fact it would spray the outside of his house and then his cat would spray all over the inside, so it was actually a relief to him that it was dead because his wife was pressuring him to kill it. Anyway, at first I was going to go their with my dog, but since my house is just across the street and he has cats, I dropped The Dog off. But in the process we walked near where I stashed a groundhog she killed back in February. So today she of course found it like a guided missile. I'm like "OK. Good. Fine. Well done. You're not fucking bringing it home. Pee on it and let's move on."
 

Volpone

Zombie Hunter
Yesterday was the 2nd anniversary of the death of my dog. I was busy enough that I didn't have a lot of time to think about it. But this afternoon it is catching up with me again. I haven't been sad much lately, but catch myself bawling again today.

If I was ever in a play or movie and needed to cry on cue, I'd just have to think about...there are two really powerful triggers. She really loved going on patrols. When she got sick she lost her balance and couldn't stand, let alone walk. A year or so earlier I'd gotten a wagon when she'd needed a tumor removed from her foot and it wasn't healing properly but it was nearly impossible to get her to stay in the wagon. Now she was happy for the wagon. She'd rest up and save all her energy for a patrol and perk up when we'd go out and patrol the neighborhood. So we're going down a sidewalk and a lady was pulling her car out of the garage and saw us and said "That is the cutest thing I've ever seen!" and I just looked at her and said "She's dying. But she loves her patrols, so I'm doing the best I can to give her them," (or something like that).

Then there was the final trip to the vet. I'd hoped she'd die the night before but she held on. By this point she'd stopped eating and drinking and her body temperature was dropping. She didn't want to go on a patrol and the vet was able to fit her in that day--if I came right away. Once it was over he said "we can take care of her for you" and I looked at him and said "NO. SHE COMES HOME WITH ME." She was not going in a dumpster or an incinerator. She's buried out back with a nice cairn over her, right where she can guard the neighbor's horses. 3 months later I did the same trip with The Cat and now they're both back there together.
 

Volpone

Zombie Hunter
Getting old is like when Superman gives up his powers so he can bang Lois and finds out what being human is like. Got some little fingernail infection a few days ago. You know, how it gets red and sore for a day or two when you rip out a hangnail? Well this time it didn't go away after a few days. In fact, I woke up at 4am with a finger that was hard, hot, and noticeably more painful and swollen than when I went to bed. Buggered off to the bathroom and swabbed it with peroxide a bit before I decided to lance it a few times. Got a satisfying amount of pus out wit every little pain. Once the discharge was watery but red, I took some aspirin, hit it with more peroxide, dipped my finger in the vodka bottle, and then iced it for 15 minutes before putting antibiotic and a bandage on it.

Reading a bit on hangnail infections in the morning, I lanced it again but no more pus came out, so I hit it with some nail fungus shit I had handy and slapped a fresh band-aid on it with more antibiotic. I should not count my weasels before they've popped. It is still noticeably red and swollen, but it doesn't hurt and it isn't stiff, so I'm hoping my mutant healing factor hasn't completely failed me.
 

Volpone

Zombie Hunter
The USAA shit-show continues. Last we heard, they just cut me a check and told me to go find the body shop of my choice because neither of their partner shops were accepting new work. So I picked out a body shop that looked good and arranged for them to work on my car. Supposed to drop it off tomorrow afternoon. The lady at the desk told me to call USAA and have them "send an assignment--they'll know what it means." She also said it was odd that they made me do all the legwork because USAA is one of 4 insurers they partner with. So I sent them a message to that effect.

I get home tonight to a message: "Unfortunately XYZ Body Shop isn't taking any appointments right now." :bang: I'm like "I literally have an appointment with them for 1:30pm tomorrow"--even sent them a screencap of the confirmation. Ye gods. I've got to get a new insurance company. And when I do I'll get a check for a few thousand dollars from my member savings account. I just wonder how soon you can change insurers after a home claim and a vehicle claim.
 

Volpone

Zombie Hunter
When I was prepping for my camera spit-roast I got a couple cartons of chicken bone broth. It seemed to meet the fasting requirements and have a lot of protein and be something Baby Yoda might like. As it happens, it is a lot cloudier than the box picture. So I had reservations about using more than the first bowl I made. Also, it tasted like...well, bone broth. Came very close to throwing the stuff out after the doctor's visit. But I'm cheap. And adventurous. Usually when I make stew, I just add water. Maybe a little milk or beer, depending on what I'm doing. I also had some celery, onions, and potatoes laying around, so I picked up some carrots and beef (ye gods, beef has gotten crazy expensive. The cheapest garbage they have costs like what a decent cut did 2 years ago). Throw in some spices and a handful of flour. It's too early to be definitive, but so far it seems this is what makes bone broth work.
 

Volpone

Zombie Hunter
The movies always made the dystopian future look so much more glamorous and exciting. Instead it's like 1970s Russia. Speaking of meat, twice in recent months I've been unable to buy ham. They just didn't have any. I mean, they had some country ham, which is so heavily salted that you need to soak it in water before eating, and they had some little presliced lunchmeat pack types and the free-range organic ham, but if you wanted to buy just a normal-sized ham for lunch sammiches, you couldn't. Dollar Tree has stopped selling eggs because they're too expensive for their business model.
 

Volpone

Zombie Hunter
So yeah. There are actually some houses on the market. Unfortunately, a lot the houses are on the market because people made stupid decisions during the pandemic when the prices were skyrocketing. Saw one, listed for $121K. Full of junk. Just clothes and stuff laying everywhere like a bomb went off inside. The description says it's a short sale. And the listing says it last sold in 2019...for $121K. So basically they've paid no down payment and made no payments since they bought the place. The kicker is, it sold before that in 2016...for $62K. So someone paid more or less twice what a place was worth of money they didn't have. Now it's up to someone like me to try to figure out a solution to that mess. You know what? It can't be done. The math just doesn't work. And the kicker is, even if I made an offer that was fair and made sense, there's no way they'd take it--even if they wanted to.

Which brings me to my earlier point: These sellers just don't understand the realities of the market. Looking at another place. $134K. Nice place. Has potential. But needs work. Hardwood floors that look to be salvageable, but are going to need a lot of sanding and probably a dark finish to hide stains. Partially finished basement with a fireplace. Not bad--if I was going to live there while I fix it up. But I can't do that. I really can't rent out my current house and I can't afford to have a new property sit vacant long enough to finish the basement--even if I had the money for the work. So I've got to clean it up--and somehow keep a renter from using the fireplace. (There's another fireplace in the living room but I'm hoping that one works.) On top of all that, in the listing photos THERE'S A HUGE FREAKING TREE laying across the roof of the garage. So. Probably listed for a reasonable price, all things considered. BUT... When I pinged my Realtor about it, she got back to me "they won't sell to investors for the first 20 days." LOL. So you really think the average homebuyer's going to shell out for a place that isn't move-in ready? They will not. They have not. Saturday was the 20 day mark. But that gets me back to my other, related point:

I have a strong temptation to punish the stupid. My Realtor got back to me "you want to go look at that place this weekend?" And I'm like "No. Let them sweat. Let it sit until the price comes down. Then we'll make a lowball offer--if it looks like something I want." The thing is, if they're this out of touch, they probably don't understand why no one is interested and what the problems are, so if I come in and say "I can give you $110K for it," they might just get offended and not do a deal--and then wind up selling it for $100K two years from now. Well. Should get going. The way the stock market's been, I need to see if I even have $110K to play with.
 

Volpone

Zombie Hunter
Looked at a couple houses today. Among other exciting things. One was very nice but I had a bad feeling about the neighborhood. And location, location, location. Other one clicked for me. Had a few problems but I think I can make it work. I just gotta get the balls to pull the trigger.

Oh, and I heard from my doctor. I have Eosiniphilic Esophagitus. The upshot of this is that my throat is inflamed and has antibody things reacting to protect me from things that don't need protecting from. Beats cancer. I mean, I might still have that. That's for the Ear Nose and Throat guy to look at. But from the pictures it doesn't look malignant to me.
 

Volpone

Zombie Hunter
Bah. Sleeping on it. Maybe the saying "You have to leap and build your wings on the way down" is the way to go. Thinking about this house some more. The roof has leaked. And is at the end of its useful life. The floor has asbestos tiles on it--that have been partially pulled up. Apparently everything to the house is electric--no gas at all. And it is on a slab, not a crawlspace or basement. So if you wanted gas in the future, plumbing it would be difficult. All that said, there's a huge fireplace that I'd have sworn was gas. But if the realtor is right, it must be electric.

Eh. I guess none of this is a deal breaker on its own. There are actually people that prefer electric to gas. And you can't get a leaky basement/crawlspace with a slab. And asbestos isn't a problem if you don't fuck with it. Put the underlayment down and then put vinyl plank over that and forget about it--just as long as some legislator or councilman doesn't come up with some rule that screws things up. And, apart from being old, the roof is in good shape and looks to be only one layer, so I can get my guys in to slap a fresh layer of shingles over it without having to tear off. I must think.
 

Volpone

Zombie Hunter
Going to put in an offer. I almost hope I don't get it, but I should want to get it.
 

Oerdin

Active Member
The movies always made the dystopian future look so much more glamorous and exciting. Instead it's like 1970s Russia. Speaking of meat, twice in recent months I've been unable to buy ham. They just didn't have any. I mean, they had some country ham, which is so heavily salted that you need to soak it in water before eating, and they had some little presliced lunchmeat pack types and the free-range organic ham, but if you wanted to buy just a normal-sized ham for lunch sammiches, you couldn't. Dollar Tree has stopped selling eggs because they're too expensive for their business model.

We are approaching peak clown world.
 

Volpone

Zombie Hunter
Put in the offer. There are wrinkles. Not flat-out dealbreaking wrinkles, but enough to make me even more nervous. Seller is selling because she's behind on payments and out of money. She can move, but she needs the money from the sale to do the move. There are legal documents that can be used to cover this case, but how much weight do they carry if the other party has no valuable assets?

Then there's carrying costs. Since part of this will be financed by my HELOC, I'll pay a couple hundred dollars of interest for a house I can't do anything with for a couple weeks.

And finally (and I hesitate to say this out loud), there's the recent insurance claim on my home for storm damage. Technically, the HELOC is a mortgage. So technically, the bank is an "interested party" that needs to be involved in the claim. BUT, because I have a $0 balance on it, it simplified things and they aren't an interested party. Before I found out just how dire the seller's straits were, she wanted to close in 45 days, to give time to move everything. Which made sense. But on learning she has no money to move until after she gets the close money, it is clear that it was just dragging heels to avoid the unpleasant.

And this is the big challenge in real estate investing: People don't want to act when a problem they have is still manageable. They want to wait until it is too late. And when it is too late, I can't make a deal work. The other house. Made an offer and their counter was too high--and they wouldn't budge on it--so we couldn't do a deal. Eventually (after sitting as "Pending" for 2 months, I saw the place was in preforeclosure. Now it lists as "Pending" again--but for a $10,000 higher asking price, so who knows what's going on with it.

On a semi-related note, every house I've looked at that is being sold because the seller is in financial trouble has evidence of an above ground pool. The Pending place, the pool was put in in 2018 (apparently) and less than 4 years later it was ruined and unusable. People make bad decisions and get into financial problems. And then they need to start making good decisions to get out of them and expecting that to happen is just crazy.
 
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