Menu
What's new

Sexist Football Commentary In Full

CaptainWacky

CaptainWacky

I want to smell dark matter
Older Football Man: Aye, the referee was a Jap, so he was...we're no the air, are we?

Younger Football Man: Nah! So how about that female lineswoman?

OFM: Chuffing Norah, a female flaming lineswoman, chuffing hell, they don't even know themselves the offside rule!

YFM: Hahaha, that's brilliant, because of the stereotype about women not knowing the offisde rule...haha...

OFM: It's true, lad, it's true. Chuffing birdcages, ask any woman the offside rule and they won't know it.

YFM: Haha, brilliant.

OFM: 'ere lad, 'ave a butcher's at this.

YFM: A what?

OFM: 'ave a look lad, quickly, before anyone sees and I stop dropping me H's.

YFM: What's that? Those stains...is that...

OFM: That's right lad, I printed out a picture of that bitch Karren Brady and came all over it! Those stains are my actual cum that I produced through the act of masturbation!

YFM: Umm...that'll show her?

OFM: Too right it will! She might want to be respected as a businesswoman, but there's nothing she can do to stop me from cumming all over pictures of her!

YFM: Hahaha...brilliant...I gues...haha!

OFM: Aye up, lad, there's that lineswoman.

YFM: I guess I should cum all over her LINESWOMAN BOOK* and and then she'll take it out of her pocket and see my cum and feel degraded.

OFM: GREAT IDEA, LAD!

YFM: Yeah...

OFM: Then we can spit on all the black players!

YFM: And the Jews!

THE END

*I don't know if lineswomen have books
 
Fuddlemiff

Fuddlemiff

Is this real life?
I just love the "sexism? hark at that!" type bit, as if they'd be the last people to say anything discriminatory, while in the act of being sexist.
 
Cassie

Cassie

Touching the monolith
Staff member
I don't know the offside rule EITHER!
 
Fuddlemiff

Fuddlemiff

Is this real life?
YOU CAN'T BE OFFSIDE FROM A GOAL KICK PASS THE BEER CORR LOOK AT THE RACK ON THAT ETC
 
CaptainWacky

CaptainWacky

I want to smell dark matter
GAZZA SHOWED UP WITH SOME CHICKEN AND A FISHING ROD.
 
Gagh

Gagh

Χριστόφορος
Sky Executives spent 35 minutes reviewing footage of Andy Gray & Richard Keyes making lewd & sexist remarks, before realising they were watching On The Buses.
 
CaptainWacky

CaptainWacky

I want to smell dark matter
Don't tell him, Pike!
 
Fuddlemiff

Fuddlemiff

Is this real life?
One of them's been sacked now merely for nuzzling a female co-presenter's boobs and pressing her hand against his crotch, saying "have a bounce off my woodwork, luv".

PC GONE MAD
 
headvoid

headvoid

Can I have Ops?
Richard Keys reckons "dark forces are at work" now.

I'm really not sure where this will go next. It's all gone a bit Harry Potter.
 
Gagh

Gagh

Χριστόφορος
headvoid said:
Richard Keys reckons "dark forces are at work" now.

I'm really not sure where this will go next. It's all gone a bit Harry Potter.
Click to expand...

I think I know what he means. Now, I buy The Times newspaper; lining Rupert Murdoch's insidious pockets is an unavoidable event in life - I like the newspaper for the sport, but today, the Editorial, Page 3, and a double page spread with opinion posts from 5 journo's spent their space laying the boot into Andy Gray.

Gray has filed a suit against News of the World for phone tapping. News of the World is a News International owned title. Gray's former employer, Sky, is a News International owned channel. The Times is also owned by News International.

The Times gives details of Gray's salary, and not one journalist has a single balanced view of the event. One states he should have been sacked for saying Lionel Messi may be the best footballer in the world, but he hasn't tried playing on a cold English night against Stoke City - seriously, isn't that what pundits are supposed to do?

Also, this footage is mysteriously 'leaked' along with details of his salary? He's been completely Murdoched in my opinion. Gray was stale beyond belief, and long past his sell-by date. Sky's worst crime was keeping him on air as long as they did, as well as the outrageous salary he was on - £1.7m a year for several day's work? Do me a favour, love ;)

What he said shouldn't have gone unpunished but the coverage this has received by his own former employer's controlled media outlets, as well as all the others, has now got to such a ludicrous point, it has transcended 'news'.

News International has remained practically silent in reporting the omnipresent News of the World phone-hacking story. It's very odd that they are willing to report so vociferously on this story, which really is such a non-story to begin with.

The 'dark forces' Keys alludes to, in my opinion, probably alludes to a probably fit-up-job by News International. He obviously can't come out and say that, or he'll get the boot. Why should he not lose his job as well? They were looking for an excuse to wash their hands of Gray.
 
CaptainWacky

CaptainWacky

I want to smell dark matter
It is weird that suddenly there's three seperate videos of him being sexist when he's probably been lumbering about grabbing girl's bums for the last 20 years.
 
Fuddlemiff

Fuddlemiff

Is this real life?
Bloody cephalopods taking over the game!
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Top