Yet Another "Ask Me Anything" Thread.

[TheArtist]

Please format all questions as if you are a Viking that happens to speak english.

I will answer like a meth/crack addled Al Haig.

GO!

 

[Dark Pickle]

Dear artist: Why is it no one can come up with their own thread ideas, and must constantly regurgitate the same boring premise?

 

[TheArtist]

Dear artist: Why is it no one can come up with their own thread ideas, and must constantly regurgitate the same boring premise?

You've been asked to type as vikings before?

damn.

 

[Sadistic Bastard]

Please format all questions as if you are a Viking that happens to speak english.

I will answer like a meth/crack addled Al Haig.

GO!

Uh, er....Rape, Pillage, burn....AUAAAAAAAGH....What like you in woman? Been on open boat at sea a LONG time and Olaf is looking good bent over oar...need to raid different than that fucking monastery. Monks are starting to like it.
What opinion? And gimme your stuff.

(sorry, that may be channeling a Marine just out of Boot-camp).

Go, Al.

-SB

 

[TheArtist]

Women: can't live with them, can't fuck them in the back of the head like that time that I saw this chinese col take this Korean girl and then blam blam blam we all sitting around a table laughing and she was stunned and numb and the back of her head was filled with cum like that time that Henry was talking to Dick and he just whipped out that elephant penis of his and started to churn and churn while yelling "this is how you mao, henry! This is how you mao!" and then when they were in Peking and its always going to be peking to me aHAHAHAHa and the full staff was there and henry tried to butt fuck Mao but henry was so tiny like a little boy that I kept in a closet in my Thai love next that the MP's never talked about because I was a fast tracking, hard hitting mutha fucking 2 star general with serious white house connections so they would let me ahve the run of the Thai titty and boy bars with my horse and confident Bebo we would go from bar to bar running the patons with our matching .45's that 42 had given us when he still officially ran the CIA from a halfway house in Costa Rica that had a special room for when someone needed a spanish girl with a single breast and all around there were these fucking somberos and somberos with fucking and the roaches, roaches, roaches and I kept yelling and yelling and all I wanted was blonde in a bottle.

Thus speaks Al Haig.

 

[TheArtist]

Next Question Please.

 

[ScrotusRex]

WHY SPEAK FREELY IS POLITIK FORM NOW? WHAT FUCK YOU FUCKS DO HAVE NO SHAME? YES WE MUUST BURN AND P[ILLAGE THET ORUM AND SET THINGS RIGHT I THINK DONT YOU MY LITTLE FRIEND? IF YOU WANT I WILL HELP YOU. YOU SEEM TO BE THE KIND OF A FORUM MEMBER WHO WOULD LIKE TO SET THE RECORD STRAIGHT. IS THIS THE PLACE FOR THAT? MY FRIEND OR ARE YOU A DOPE? THAT IS ONE THING I REALL NEED TO KNOW. AND YOUR ANSWER WILL DETERMINE THE ANSWER TO THAT QUESTION. I DON'T THINK YOU REALLY WANT TO BE LN MY LITTLE PLIST OF DOEPES DO YOU NOW? THAT ONE ASS WHO POSTED THE TRUMP VIDOE IS ON IT FOR NOW AND HE KNOW SA WHY SO YOU CAN ASK HIM IF YOU WANT. MAYBE HE CAN ASK YOU HERE IN YOUR THREAD WHY HE IS A DOPE?

 

[Cluckyx]

I googled translating something into norse but then i wanted a cigarette

 

[eloisel]

Are you a hunky looking male Viking with a sweet attitude, a bank account full of money, and you can and will cook and clean house?
If so, I'll write like a Viking.
Otherwise, you have my question.

 

[TheArtist]

Yes. Yes I am.

 

[eloisel]

I don't have a runic keyboard.

 

[TheArtist]

You're dead to me now.

 

[The Question]

Lissun HAY -- HAY lissun mang! I gotz teh MO-jo mang! Mang even nem hairzy woodland beezitches be up ohn mah jong, mang! Tuther day wun nem hairzy woodland beezitches grabulates me by muh testa-cleez n froez me up agin a tree n commence-stipates ta ridin' uponalongsideatoppa me like I was a stolen bicycle mang! I swurr to Goddamighteh! N sheezaw whispern sweet nuffins in mu ear hole like "Urgh urgh urgh urgh blawrgh urgh blawrgh!" N I'm awllike "Naw babeh I'm married to muh FAWRM n shyeit!" But she ain't havinnat! Dem biggity-feeted wimminz ALL about me, Ah tail yew hwut!

What. :/

 

[NeonMercuryASH]

He had a hard time spelling convfefe.

 

[TheArtist]

I'm sorry - was that supposed to be witty? Or making a tired and over-wrought political joke about our joke of a current president.

Also, :ham: is still not fixed.

 

['Gear]

NMA is never witty.

Limited, mostly unsuccessful attempts at acerbic is about the best I've seen from her.

But no, not wit.

Oh, and she says hi to Lovechild sometimes, too.

 

[TheArtist]

I'm really more concerned about :ham:

 

[Loktar]

I'm really more concerned about :ham:

I'm ore concerned with the moles on The Saint's mom's boobs. Oh wait....nevermind....those are her nipples. So hairy....

 

[eloisel]

You're dead to me now.

No, I'm not.

 

[TheArtist]

Yes, yes you are.

#talkingtothedead