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Should all E4 presenters...

Gagh

Gagh

Χριστόφορος
...be subjected to Euthansia live on air after a minimum 4 months on air?

Let's face it, it's not too difficult to scout the asylums for replacements afterwards, so there is high percentage of expendability, plus C4 would get a new show out of it.


We could have (rigged) phone-ins on how they die. The Geordie guy could do commentary on death throes on Slow-Mo replay. This idea may have some steam.
 
Cant we just make them fight to the death over Amok time fight music.
 
Still at least they aren't humiliating SG1 fans by always taking the piss out of anyone who enjoyed the show every time an episode finished any more.

Presumably because they stopped showing the thing two years before it ended.
 
Yeah, I remember watching something (Smallville? Enterprise? Why would I watch Enterprise? Eww) and being told by the "cool" presenters what a loser I was for doing so. The presenters presenting the the uncool shows, that is.
 
Let's have no sci-fi influences at all. Let's just kill them with completely unfeasable methods.

For instance, you see June Sarpong smiling & waving on a wooden chair, in a room that is totally white. Suddenly, the camera shot pulls up several hundred feet in super quick time, and a Tomcat swoops in and bombs the fuck out of the room (which is just sitting, like a movie set in the middle of the desert).

Sarpong's bloodied head spirals out of the explosion into the camera, knocking it to black, and the Geordie guy on voiceover simply says "Join us next week for Kill an E4 Presenter".
 
How could you tell the difference between June Sarpong and the wooden chair, lol omg?

THAT WELSH GUY? SHOOT HIS KNEES. THEN HIS TEETH.
 
With a compressed air weapon? Messier. More painful.
 
Ok how about this one, you take one of the presenters, and leave them in a huge natural deperssion, like a crater, tied to a chair in the dead center.

You then fire a wrecking ball in at an angle, so it spins around the rim like a roulette ball, slowly spiralling in towards the centre.

Eventually it will roll over them, and finally they can make an impact on the entertainment scene
 
shoot a man up the asshole with a low-caiber weapon. He'll bleed to death internally. Takes hours to die.

Actually, you can then take bets on how long it will take him to die.

There's all kinds of fun you can have with this technique.
 
whisky said:
Ok how about this one, you take one of the presenters, and leave them in a huge natural deperssion, like a crater, tied to a chair in the dead center.

You then fire a wrecking ball in at an angle, so it spins around the rim like a roulette ball, slowly spiralling in towards the centre.

Eventually it will roll over them, and finally they can make an impact on the entertainment scene
Click to expand...

with a splash
 
How about feeding them all tainted meat?
 
I've heard of tinted windows, but not tinted meat.
 
How about forcibly inserting a former BB housemate up their arseholes until they split wide open, smashing their pelvis to pieces?
 
Gagh said:
How about forcibly inserting a former BB housemate up their arseholes until they split wide open, smashing their pelvis to pieces?
Click to expand...

Bubble?
 
Miquita Oliver could have a giant cigarette paper rolled around her, then have grass stuffed in the top. Then a giant lighter sets the abomination on fire as she croaks out annoying phrases "people... like, I literally think I'm burning? Like, literally? And it's like omg?"
 
I fucking hated it when she was on Never Mind The Buzzcocks and every "joke" was just Simon saying "WE USED TO WORK TOGETHER ON FOUR, ISN'T THAT FUNNY, ISN'T MIQUITA FUNNY" and no it wasn't and no she wasn't.
 
I thought he was taking the piss out of how he'd moved up in the world and she was still doing links for Smallville, so I found it funny.
 
Maybe he was, OR MAYBE SHE'S A BAD PRESENTEr.
 
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