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BATMAN?!

He'll be back.
1216188995211.jpg

Batman always has a plan.
 
This was covered in the Metro paper in the UK. This paper has possibly the laziest journalists in the world working on it. They would cover a paint drying contest sponsored by Dulux if someone wrote the press release for them and gave them a good picture.

This is proof it is pure PR splurdge and deserves to be treated as such.

In fact I have given it too much importance by has,dasnlfnaksjnkdjansdlawjdlkdscz
 
I enjoy The Metro's page 3 "Oh look, a frog riding a little bicycle!" images when there isn't enough real news.
 
Isnt that the free paper you get on trains?
 
And buses. I don't thik their journalists even know about wikipedia.
 
...shit...I hadn't even looked into HOW they were going kill him off, and then I stumbled across this on some site:

"Batman is shot and killed by his father, who faked his own death years ago and now leads the evil Black Glove organization."
I have to wonder if such monumental lameness comes naturally to these guys, or if they really put some effort into it.
 
Thats not in the least bit correct.

Its lamer even than that, some bad guy tries to escape in a helicopter, Batman jumps on the helicopter, which then explodes and crashes, they dont find his body.

Yes, very convincing death that, NOT!
 
Batman's dad was a good man!

(I'm basing this entirely on the scenes from Batman Begins.)
 
if batman's dad was evil and faked his own death, then batman's entire crime-fighting life has been a sham. a really lame sham. christ, that would be a really lame sham.

lame sham. lame sham lame sham lame shame lamb shame lamb shamb shame lambed.
 
I'm a sad bat-panda. :(
 
Next it'll turn out that Batman's mum was a slut.
 
MARTHA! MARTHA???

SLOOOOOOWLY I TURNED! STEP BY STEP! INCH BY INCH!




(sorry, old I Love Lucy reference)
 
Batman's dad now ADA on Law & Order.

Coincidence?
 
whisky said:
Thats not in the least bit correct.
Click to expand...
Batboozled again!

Its lamer even than that, some bad guy tries to escape in a helicopter, Batman jumps on the helicopter, which then explodes and crashes, they dont find his body.

Yes, very convincing death that, NOT!
Click to expand...
...and the moral of the story, children, is
FUCK YOU, FANS.
 
WHAT ABOUT SPIDER-BAT?
 
So it turns out, depsite this story being called "BATMAN RIP" and promises of "YES BATMAN FUCKING DIES IN THIS STORY" that,in fact...he survived somehow. Then died again in Final Crisis issues 6. Which won't stick either, I'm sure. Here's a fucking blog to explain better than me.

http://handofmessi.blogspot.com/
 
What a pile of crap. Glad I didn't buy it.

DC will reset the universe again in another year or two, since this latest stunt epic has generally been a failure.

Leave my Batman the fuck alone, you hacks. He's Bruce Wayne. End of story.
 
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