CAST The Hobbit

[CaptainWacky]

Since we now now it's almost definitely actually going to be made, it's time to CAST THIS MOTHER.

Bilbo Baggins: Bob Hoskins
Gandalf The Grey: Ian McKellen
Smaug: Leonard Nimoy (voice)
Thorin Oakenshield: Sean Connery (will settle for Ray Winstone)
Gollum: Andy Serkis
Elrond: Hugo Weaving
Beorn: Dwayne Johnson
Bombur: Jorge Garcia

Can't think of anyone for Bard or Thranduil...but definitely not Jude Law.

 

[whisky]

I wont see this unless all the parts are played by William Shatner.

 

[CaptainWacky]

He's nearly 80, isn't he, and it's not filming until 2009 probably...

 

[whisky]

76, so he'll be 78 then.

I believe Christopher Lee was older than that when he was in the LOTR movies

 

[CaptainWacky]

But he didn't play EVERY PART.

 

[whisky]

Thats because hes not William Shatner, he'll have every part done by dinner time on teh first day, and still find time to shag the directors PA.

 

[CaptainWacky]

DENNY CRANE

 

[Eggs Mayonnaise]

Bombur: Jorge Garcia

The movie should consist entirely of Jorge sitting in a large rocking chair by a roaring fire, reading us the novel.

 

[Gagh]

Tom Bombadil ~ Garrett Wang

 

[CaptainWacky]

Not in The Hobbit, unless Jackson's going to FUCKING CHANGE IT.

(But Garrett would be awesome!)

 

[Mentalist]

Bilbo Baggins: Elton John

Gandalf The Grey: Dr. Ron Paul

Smaug: Leonard Nimoy (dragon suit)

Thorin Oakenshield: Rab C Nesbitt

Gollum: Brian from Big Brother

Elrond: David Beckham

Beorn: Avery Brooks

Bombur: Jo Brand

 

[CaptainWacky]

^Yo ######, it's time you re-uploaded or re-made or RE-SOMETHINGED the Leonard Nimoy for Smaug video to youtube, now that this shit is actually happening.