CaptainWacky
I want to smell dark matter
Have to see if I'm ST ILL ALIVE MEN
BECJAKsUe Im FLATTER THAN SOME KIND OF STEAMROLED PANCAKE
#
THAt'S FLAT
BUT
NO
NOT EVEN THAT
IF YI WAS FEELING FLAGT IAT LEAST IW OULD FEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEL SOMETHING
THERE'S NO FLATNESS
THERE IS NOTHING
THAT'S WHERE TI COMES FROM
"THERE IS NOTHING!
THERE REALLY IS
FJJJJJJJ
FLATLINE
JUST KEEP POPPING INTO EXISTENCE FOR A FEW SEONCDS A DAY
BUT TH EMAJORITI OF THE TIME
THERE IS NOTHINGGGGGGGG
F
NOT A THING
NOT FLAT
JUST
JJUST
JUST
THIS
LOLFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF
FINGERS AREC COL
D
DANYWAY
FSDJ WASN'T THIS SUPPOSED TO BE CREAGIGE
_______--
TREEBARD WENT TO THE ZOOE AND SAID 2HELLO I AM TREEEBEARD WHERE ALL THE DUCKS AT" AND THE ZOOKEEPER SAID "SORRY WE DON'T HAVE ANY YOU BIG GRAPEFRUIT" AND TREEEEEEEEBEARD SAID "WELL THAT'S TOO BAD BECASUE I NEED TO EAT DUCKS TO RETAIN MY SANITY AND NOW THAT I HAVEN'T EATN A DAMN DUCK FOR TWELVE HOURS THAT MEANS I'M GOING TO GO INSANE HOOOM HOOM" AND RIPPED THE ZOOEKEEEEEEEEPER'S HEAD OFF AND USED IT AS A FOOTBALL AND HE SCORED A GOAL BUT TH EREFEEREE SAID "OFFISIDE!" AND TREEBEARD SAID "WHAT YOU BASTARD-TARD THAT WAS NEVER OFFISDE ARE YOU BLIND YO9U FUCKING PILLOCK" AND CARVED THE REF'S EYES OUT WITH A BUTTER KNIFE AND SAID "WELL YOU ARE BLIND NOW HROOM HRROOM" AND WENT ON A RAMPAGE FUCKING STOMPING ON CHILDREDN AND THEY SCREAMED FOR MERCY AND TREEEBEARD SAID "YOUV'E JUST SEEN THE LAST OF IT" AND KILLED THEM EVEN HARDER THAN BEFORE UNTIL THEY WERE SO UTTERLY DEAD THAT EVEN DEREK ACOARH THE GREAT SPIRITUAL MEDIUM SAID "FUCK NOT EVEN I CAN FUCKING COMMUNICATE WITH THESE BASTARD AND I'M DEREK ACOARAH THE GREAT SPIRITUAL MEDIUM TREEEBEARD YOU HAVE A LOT TO ANSWER FOR" BUT THE ARMY WENT AFTER TREEBEARD IN TANKS AND HE HAD CLIMBED TO THE TOP OF BIG BEN NOW AND THEY SHOT FUCKING ROCKETS AT HIM BUT THEY MISSE DNAD BIG BEN WAS DESTROYED AND THEN BORIS JOHNSON WENT ON THE NEWS FUCKING PISSED OFF AND ALL RED FACED AND BANGING HIS FISTS ON ADRIAN CHILES AND HE SAID "LET ME FUCKING MAKE SOME SHIT CLEAR HERE, ARMY GUYS, BIG BEN DIED FOR SOMETHIGN, BIG BEN WAS PROUD, YOU FUCKERS WILL DIE FOR NOTHING NAKED AND ALONE THERE WILL BE A GREAT RECKONING YOU ASSHOLES YOU CUNTS YOU WANKSTIANS" AND WHIPPED OUT HIS BIG HUGE COCK AND FUCKING SLAPPED ADRIAN CHILES IN THE FACE WITH IT AND RAN OFF INTO THE WOODS AND THE ARMY STARTED HUNTING BORIS NOW BECAUSE THEY THOUGHT HE WAS A GREATER THREAT THAN TREEBEARD WHO KNOWS WHO HE MIGHT SLAP NEXT COULD BE ED THE DUCK OR FUCKING AINSLEY FOR ALL THEY KNEW AND THEN FNIALLY BORIS FOUND TREEBEARD AT THE HEART OF THE FOREST AND TREEBEARD WAS EATING A DUCK AND HE WAS LUCID AND HE SAID "OH GOD BORIS WHAT HAVE I DONE I KILLED ALL THEM KIDS MAN I KILLED THEM KIDS" AND CRIED INTO BORIS' ANUS AND THE TEARS TRANSFORMED BORISH INTO A LIVING PLANT AND HE GREW AND GREW AND GREW AND THEN HE FLOWERED AND A BEE TRIED TO POLLINATE HIM BUT BORISH SAID "WIFF WAFF MISTER BEE" AND FUCKING SMACKED HIM WITH HIS FLOWER DICK AND TREEBEARD COMMITED SUICIDE IN SHAME AND NO ONE WENT TO HIS FUNERAL NOT EVEN PIPPIN.
THE END
BECJAKsUe Im FLATTER THAN SOME KIND OF STEAMROLED PANCAKE
#
THAt'S FLAT
BUT
NO
NOT EVEN THAT
IF YI WAS FEELING FLAGT IAT LEAST IW OULD FEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEL SOMETHING
THERE'S NO FLATNESS
THERE IS NOTHING
THAT'S WHERE TI COMES FROM
"THERE IS NOTHING!
THERE REALLY IS
FJJJJJJJ
FLATLINE
JUST KEEP POPPING INTO EXISTENCE FOR A FEW SEONCDS A DAY
BUT TH EMAJORITI OF THE TIME
THERE IS NOTHINGGGGGGGG
F
NOT A THING
NOT FLAT
JUST
JJUST
JUST
THIS
LOLFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF
FINGERS AREC COL
D
DANYWAY
FSDJ WASN'T THIS SUPPOSED TO BE CREAGIGE
_______--
TREEBARD WENT TO THE ZOOE AND SAID 2HELLO I AM TREEEBEARD WHERE ALL THE DUCKS AT" AND THE ZOOKEEPER SAID "SORRY WE DON'T HAVE ANY YOU BIG GRAPEFRUIT" AND TREEEEEEEEBEARD SAID "WELL THAT'S TOO BAD BECASUE I NEED TO EAT DUCKS TO RETAIN MY SANITY AND NOW THAT I HAVEN'T EATN A DAMN DUCK FOR TWELVE HOURS THAT MEANS I'M GOING TO GO INSANE HOOOM HOOM" AND RIPPED THE ZOOEKEEEEEEEEPER'S HEAD OFF AND USED IT AS A FOOTBALL AND HE SCORED A GOAL BUT TH EREFEEREE SAID "OFFISIDE!" AND TREEBEARD SAID "WHAT YOU BASTARD-TARD THAT WAS NEVER OFFISDE ARE YOU BLIND YO9U FUCKING PILLOCK" AND CARVED THE REF'S EYES OUT WITH A BUTTER KNIFE AND SAID "WELL YOU ARE BLIND NOW HROOM HRROOM" AND WENT ON A RAMPAGE FUCKING STOMPING ON CHILDREDN AND THEY SCREAMED FOR MERCY AND TREEEBEARD SAID "YOUV'E JUST SEEN THE LAST OF IT" AND KILLED THEM EVEN HARDER THAN BEFORE UNTIL THEY WERE SO UTTERLY DEAD THAT EVEN DEREK ACOARH THE GREAT SPIRITUAL MEDIUM SAID "FUCK NOT EVEN I CAN FUCKING COMMUNICATE WITH THESE BASTARD AND I'M DEREK ACOARAH THE GREAT SPIRITUAL MEDIUM TREEEBEARD YOU HAVE A LOT TO ANSWER FOR" BUT THE ARMY WENT AFTER TREEBEARD IN TANKS AND HE HAD CLIMBED TO THE TOP OF BIG BEN NOW AND THEY SHOT FUCKING ROCKETS AT HIM BUT THEY MISSE DNAD BIG BEN WAS DESTROYED AND THEN BORIS JOHNSON WENT ON THE NEWS FUCKING PISSED OFF AND ALL RED FACED AND BANGING HIS FISTS ON ADRIAN CHILES AND HE SAID "LET ME FUCKING MAKE SOME SHIT CLEAR HERE, ARMY GUYS, BIG BEN DIED FOR SOMETHIGN, BIG BEN WAS PROUD, YOU FUCKERS WILL DIE FOR NOTHING NAKED AND ALONE THERE WILL BE A GREAT RECKONING YOU ASSHOLES YOU CUNTS YOU WANKSTIANS" AND WHIPPED OUT HIS BIG HUGE COCK AND FUCKING SLAPPED ADRIAN CHILES IN THE FACE WITH IT AND RAN OFF INTO THE WOODS AND THE ARMY STARTED HUNTING BORIS NOW BECAUSE THEY THOUGHT HE WAS A GREATER THREAT THAN TREEBEARD WHO KNOWS WHO HE MIGHT SLAP NEXT COULD BE ED THE DUCK OR FUCKING AINSLEY FOR ALL THEY KNEW AND THEN FNIALLY BORIS FOUND TREEBEARD AT THE HEART OF THE FOREST AND TREEBEARD WAS EATING A DUCK AND HE WAS LUCID AND HE SAID "OH GOD BORIS WHAT HAVE I DONE I KILLED ALL THEM KIDS MAN I KILLED THEM KIDS" AND CRIED INTO BORIS' ANUS AND THE TEARS TRANSFORMED BORISH INTO A LIVING PLANT AND HE GREW AND GREW AND GREW AND THEN HE FLOWERED AND A BEE TRIED TO POLLINATE HIM BUT BORISH SAID "WIFF WAFF MISTER BEE" AND FUCKING SMACKED HIM WITH HIS FLOWER DICK AND TREEBEARD COMMITED SUICIDE IN SHAME AND NO ONE WENT TO HIS FUNERAL NOT EVEN PIPPIN.
THE END
