Charlie Sheen madlibs

[Archibald Nixon]

http://www.vanityfair.com/hollywood/features/2011/02/stark-raving-mad-libs-201102

My result:

I am on a drug. It’s called Wombat Q. Hassenpfeffer. If you try it once, you will flay. Your nubbin will melt off, and your sainted aunties will squirm over your wombatted body … I’m tired of pretending like I’m not patriotish—a total freaking editor from Omicron 5. I’ve got savage wombat blood, Athena DNA! … They picked a fight with a were-llama. They’re trying to take all my cojones and leave me with no means to shrivel my family. It’s not geophysics! They owe me an apology while shnoogling my left thumbnail … I don’t think people are ready for the shmagent I’m delivering, and delivering with a sense of sloppy drunk love. I exposed recidivists to magic! Here’s your salty tears test. Next one goes in your pie hole!

 

[Ilyanna]

snicker...

“I am on a drug. It’s called Anorexia C. Hinkelstein. If you try it once, you will butcher. Your earlobe will melt off, and your great-aunt will run over your splattered body … I’m tired of pretending like I’m not youknowwhat—a total freaking drag queen from jupiter. I’ve got goose blood, Hades DNA! … They picked a fight with a Humpty-Dumpty. They’re trying to take all my lampshades and leave me with no means to perambulate my family. It’s not terraforming! They owe me an apology while snogging my armpit … I don’t think people are ready for the Latte I’m delivering, and delivering with a sense of dinky love. I exposed astronauts to magic! Here’s your drivel test. Next one goes in your eyelid!”

 

[Consumer]

Muammar Qaddafi’s Mad-Lib:

“I am a Bus-boy, a revolutionary from the Water Fountains …. I am not going to Expectorate this land. I will die here as a Peacock. You Dilbert Groupies and Inuit who Go Googlie-eyed Qaddafi … get out of your Termite Mounds and fill the Blast Furnaces …. A gangrenous group of Pathetic people who have taken Freon have Crucify police stations like Hambils … Sell the Gerblils. Stem-bolts in Walla-Walla protested for days near a Tab sign …. Then the Snow-plows came and Flogged them …. I have not yet ordered one Trekkies to be Fellated. When I do, everything will Squash. There is no going Towards St. Luci. Only Down South, Under Disneyland, Wherever they are holding Fe-Fe!”

 

[I Love Cunt]

Mad Libs are fun​

“I am on a drug. It’s called Samantha Hardrail. If you try it once, you will Shanking. Your Mustache will melt off, and your Dogs will Running over your coughed body … I’m tired of pretending like I’m not homey—a total freaking dog sitter from earth. I’ve got ant eater blood, mufasa DNA! … They picked a fight with a odeseus. They’re trying to take all my blankets and leave me with no means to fucking my family. It’s not experiments! They owe me an apology while sucking my knees … I don’t think people are ready for the floor I’m delivering, and delivering with a sense of bloody love. I exposed fingers to magic! Here’s your pus test. Next one goes in your ears!”​

 

[CaptainWacky]

“I am on a drug. It’s called Captain Wacky. If you try it once, you will foom. Your HUGE COCK will melt off, and your cousin Merle will wank over your foomed body … I’m tired of pretending like I’m not squirreltastic—a total freaking wrestler from Vulcan. I’ve got goose blood, Hercules DNA! … They picked a fight with a hobbit. They’re trying to take all my kittens and leave me with no means to kick my family. It’s not master of atoms! They owe me an apology while boohatting my fucking foot … I don’t think people are ready for the Captain Kirk I’m delivering, and delivering with a sense of boohat love. I exposed Jews to magic! Here’s your breast milk test. Next one goes in your nosehole!”

!