OK, let's see...
one of the reasons for your long absence - besides the obvious one of banned account, was the fact that in Jan 09, you had a nervous breakdown triggered by some unfortunate mishap during a revisit of the Niagara Falls. (Something to do with a bottle of Spanish Fly, a tree trunk, and the Darwin Award, but your shrink didn't think it ethical to tell more for only $10)
Ever since, you cannot stand the sound of running water, which makes wild monkey sex in the shower a tad awkward. Since Caco does like showers VERY MUCH, she insisted on you doing a confrontation therapy, but since she's kinda fond of you (lol, I have no idea if she still is...), you're allowed to do small steps at a time.
WHAT BETTER WAY TO START THIS BY FLOODING DC, you asked yourself... well, and there you are.