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Gems from the ground

headvoid

Can I have Ops?
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nice!
 
Wow. Looks like my nightstand in the late 80s. back then I could identify most of those AND tell you their energy amplifying / healing properties.
 
lol, same here. I still have them lying around somewhere, haven't thought of them for ages.
 
I think I do too. I feel bad that they've been stuffed in some bag or box all these years, not seeing any sunshine or being polished or sitting in some knit bag around a hippie's neck...
 
STILL GOT THAT BEJEWELLED HIGH SCORE...YOU CUNTS.
 
BUT WHICH DO YOU GO AFTER MORE? TOURMALINE, TIGER'S EYE OR MALACHITE?
 
DAMNED HIPPIES AND THEIR POWER STONES!
 
It's a shame that jade's good name has been tarnished by chavs being named jade, it would be my favourite if it didn't make me think of kebabs.
 
sometimes life is just like that.
 
I would say life is more like a pizza than a kebab.
 
you would say that.
 
Pizza's really good at the beginning. Full of wonderful flavours and textures that make you feel warm and excited for the experience ahead. But toward the end it gets cold, you slow down and start to wonder if you can really carry on much longer. Then you suddenly realise it's all over, and wish oh wish oh wish you could start again from the beginning. But the most you can do is stare wistfully and jealously at others who are just beginning to tuck into their fresh pizzas. They seem so oblivious of their good fortune, stuffing their mouths, trying to get through it all as fast as they can. "Slow down. Savour it while it lasts", you feel like telling them. But would they listen? Would you have listened?
 
I once met a man who was indulging himself in a massive, nationwide Pavlovian experiment. He was the Marketing director of a very large Pizza chain that focused on delivering

He sponsored a major Saturday night show, so the bumper breaks were showing gorgeous shots of cheesy Pizza. He then showed me a graph of orders from his national system, cross referenced with a graph showing the bumper break times. There was basically a 60 second delay between the bumper break and people ordering Pizza. Even with some reduction from "I was going to order take away in the break anyway" the correlation was scary, really very very scary. A nation of Pavlovian Homers shouting to their families "SHALL I GET THE PIZZA IN LUV?" and killing them slowly with Coca-Cola, Salt and Cheesy fat.

At that point, most people would have been repulsed and become worried for the state of the nation. I wondered how I could make money out of these lazy, fat bastards. I really did. I could blame the fact I came from a poor family, so have had a pathological fear of being poor again. The reality is I am just an evil bastard.
 
If you and all your ad men friends teamed up, you could probably convince the world that I (CaptainWacky) am God and should be worshipped. So how about doing that, eh?
 
Failing that, they could convince you that they'd convinced the world that you were God, while in actuality only getting as far as introducing a character called Captain Wacky in a new Birdseye campaign, where he features as a bad guy who wants to steal fish fingers from Cap'n Birdseye and his motley/molested crew of kids who should really be in school instead of pissing about on a boat with some creepy old man.
 
That's what I call VIRAL marketing! (The virus is a sexually transmitted disease.)
 
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