Happy Birthday Donovan

['Gear]

Some 42 years ago by some accounts, Donovan's mom let his dad fuck her. She probably pretended to not want him to fuck her bareback (speculation on my part here) but obviously she did. Dad, not one to miss an opportunity to bang some willing chick, got right in there and grunted his way to completion. Somewhere in all the sticky mess was a tiny protodon swimming with all his might. Deep in his mother wet pussy he met the egg, beat out all others, and here he is today.

Donovan I'm happy your mom was so raw and slutty and I'm glad your dad fucked her bareback. I'm also pleased she saw fit to shat you out some nine months or so later. You must have been a bloody, yelling, stinking mess. I'm glad they washed you off and let live.

BTW Technically speaking your birthday was nine months ago dumbass.

Happy belated successful biological imperative day.

Gear

 

[Consumer]

That was beautiful.

Someone pass me a hankie.

 

[Donovan]

He was a pool hustler and she was a waitress. He poured sweet nothings in her ear and speed in her coffee and when she saw stars she thought it was true love for both him and that fantastic coffee. Married in june sixty eight and I came in october. So I am not a total bastard but I'm very close. The speed probably helped me swim faster than the other ten billion spermatazoa...think they'll make me give back my medal for using performance enhancing substances? Mom had to get a quickie divorce and a quickie marriage and left town and was estranged from her family for close to forty years over it, so let this be a lesson to you: I was fucking with other peoples lives before I was even born. Troll to the goddamn core....

 

[Loktar]

Happy Birthday, Dono.

(sorry I don't have a speech/story for your birthday)

 

[jack]

ZYGOTE

 

[Donovan]

Smile when you say that, mister.

 

[Archibald Nixon]

Welcome to the year of being the answer to Life, the Universe, and Everything. I'm six months into it and lemme tell ya: omniscience is a lot less work than I expected.

 

['Gear]

Donovan is just slightly older then me which means he has slightly more life experience and my mom gave herself up for penetration and subsequent creampie somewhat later.

Of course I'm slightly sexier so it evens out in the end.

I think the real lesson here is that all our mothers are insatiable cum sluts who didn't have the presence of mind to use a condom. Or they just prefer the feeling of a bare cock squirting deep inside their hungry pussys.

There's no love in biology.

TO MOMS!

And the spurting spooge of our fathers!

 

[Donovan]

If you know my ol man there's a better than even chance we're brothers. That guy would fuck a knothole if it weren't for splinters...

 

[Henoch]

Happy Birthday Donovan!!:cheer2::flypig:uppet:

 

[Yub]

This thread makes me want go impregnate my wife, but I already did that three or so months ago, so I guess I'll just go bone up instead.

Also:

 

[Donovan]

Now that's a present!