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Hey Hellman

It would seem there are a few people in need of an epiphany, a moment of clarity so to speak. In absence of such a moment, please allow me:
Douchebag Intervention

littlevoice of reason said:
What are you doing here?
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I'm typing a scathing insult to my archenemy, jack/danny/geedis.

To what purpose?
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Because I want to prove to the world he/he/he's a douchebag.

Has it worked yet?
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I don't know. People lie on the internets. Besides, when I insult jack/danny/geedis everyone usually leaves the board.

Is that so? How many times has this happened?
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I dunno, like three or four maybe. But I must PROVE to the world that he/he/he is a douchebag without equal.

I see. And how exactly did you discover this knowledge? Who told you jack/danny/geedis was a douchebag?
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Well jack/danny/geedis told me, of course! Plus, look at the guy/guy/guy's posts! All he/he/he does is follow people around causing trouble, never has anything to say that isn't an insult to jack/danny/geedis. It's fucking ANNOYING!
And this is different from your purpose?
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Yeah! I mean, NO! Wait...Okay maybe you have a point. But I HAVE to warn the world that jack/danny/geedis is no good, no good at all.

So you say. But if jack/danny/geedis' own posts showed him/him/him to be a douchebag, don't you think others already have seen the same thing from them and from you?
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...

How much time have you spent on this quest, jack/danny/geedis?
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Um. Let's see, an hour yesterday, two today...carry the three...multiply...square root plus pi...rounded down...all of 2003 plus leap year...

...About five years.

Five years of endless warfare with no clear victor? Are you a Republican?
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Well, when you put it that way, it sorta seems like a wasted effort...

You've missed a lot of internet porn over these last few years, haven't you my friend?
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SOB..yes...I'm so ashamed...help me stop, Little Voice of Reason!

There there. Admitting an addiction is the first and bravest step. Now repeat after me: Lord, grant me the courage to ignore jack/danny/geedis, the wisdom to recognize sock puppets/duals/real posters, and the restraint to shut the fuck up about which is which.
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Lord grant me all the shit that guy said. And also a pony. I've always wanted a pony.

Fair enough. Now remember: "I insulted jack/danny/geedis yesterday. I did not insult jack/danny/geedis today. I hope I do not insult jack/danny/geedis tomorrow. One day at a time, sweet Jesus."
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Are we gonna sing Kumbayah, now?
 
Donovan said:
It would seem there are a few people in need of an epiphany, a moment of clarity so to speak. In absence of such a moment, please allow me:
Douchebag Intervention
I'm typing a scathing insult to my archenemy, jack/danny/geedis.
Because I want to prove to the world he/he/he's a douchebag.
I don't know. People lie on the internets. Besides, when I insult jack/danny/geedis everyone usually leaves the board.
I dunno, like three or four maybe. But I must PROVE to the world that he/he/he is a douchebag without equal.
Well jack/danny/geedis told me, of course! Plus, look at the guy/guy/guy's posts! All he/he/he does is follow people around causing trouble, never has anything to say that isn't an insult to jack/danny/geedis. It's fucking ANNOYING!
Yeah! I mean, NO! Wait...Okay maybe you have a point. But I HAVE to warn the world that jack/danny/geedis is no good, no good at all.
...
Um. Let's see, an hour yesterday, two today...carry the three...multiply...square root plus pi...rounded down...all of 2003 plus leap year...
...About five years.
Well, when you put it that way, it sorta seems like a wasted effort...
SOB..yes...I'm so ashamed...help me stop, Little Voice of Reason!
Lord grant me all the shit that guy said. And also a pony. I've always wanted a pony.
Are we gonna sing Kumbayah, now?
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Wow!! There is more than one internet in this world!! I am now hellbent on finding the others!! Away I go!
 
Of course, most people would understand that the word "internets" was deliberate and part of the joke...


Most people.
 
Donovan said:
Of course, most people would understand that the word "internets" was deliberate and part of the joke...


Most people.
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Nice attempt to cover your ass. I have seen it all before. Now run along my little leprechaun.
 
SaintLucifer said:
*ROTFLMAO* Another moron who thinks exactly like DONOVAN. No there is not you dipshit.
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BTW, isn't a douchebag intervention when the douchebag intervenes? Otherwise it would be antidouchebag or something.
 
Well, they don't call it an anti-alcoholic intervention or an anti drug intervention, so I don't think so. However, even if there were semantic errors, I'm pretty sure everyone knows who the douchebags in question are. When one requires quick action to deprogram a douchebag, one generally calls on the expert services of a professional douchebag, wouldn't you agree?

What can I say, I work cheap...
 
Donovan said:
Mocking you and backpedaling are not the same thing, SnuttBiffer.
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That's funny, the mistake was made by you. But that's what douchebags do!

I'll let you get back to intervention, Douchebag.
 
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