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How Do You Recover?

Vox Populi said:
It's a super long story, but the trigger was his ex-wife's established pattern of talking to me as if I were a piece of trash. He never did anything about it (like tell her to show me some respect) and he didn't want me to confront her and express my feelings to her. He and I have argued about this time after time with no resolution and I know another argument would not have gotten him to see things my way. I thought it would be better to leave than to stay and continue being disrespected by his ex-wife for the rest of my life.
With all that being said, we had an awesome relationship at one point in time and I still don't understand how such a good relationship went so wrong.
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Boo hoo hoo. Cry me a river. You know why you left and you know that anyone with any sense would agree that it was the correct decision to make. This is not an issue of love; this is an issue of personal respect. Do unto others and all that. It is simple human decency for people to treat eachother with respect, and if he allows you to be disrespected in front of him, and in front of anyone else, without your approval/support of said disrespect, then there will be more far-reaching ramifications in the future of the relationship. You already know this, it is why you left him. The person you love no longer exists, he has been replaced by someone who lacks common human decency, and it is never a good idea to associate with such people. Except for here at TK of course.

Get angry at his lack of respect for you as a person. Stay angry. That will help motivate you to move on.
 
Gonad is right.

Somebody attack you, you have the right to defend yourself. You don't need her ex-husband's permission to kick her ass, have her arrested, or plain out make her disappear.
 
Darth Pikle,

Your pic of JD makes me laugh every time I see it. It reminds me of the first time Darthsikle told me he loved me... We had been in Atlantic City playing blackjack for hours, drinking martinis made with whiskey. To make a long story short, I drank so much that I ended up puking my guts out in the ladies restroom. I passed out and was rushed via ambulance to the Atlantic City Medical Center. When we finally got back to our hotel hours later and crawled into bed together, in the sweetest voice, he said to me, "I love you. Do you love me?" I was drunk out of my mind, but I remember that night clearly.

Would you believe that I haven't been able to drink whiskey since that horrible experience? The smell of it makes me ill. I'm going to have to do something about that.
 
Gonad said:
Boo hoo hoo. Cry me a river. You know why you left and you know that anyone with any sense would agree that it was the correct decision to make. This is not an issue of love; this is an issue of personal respect. Do unto others and all that. It is simple human decency for people to treat eachother with respect, and if he allows you to be disrespected in front of him, and in front of anyone else, without your approval/support of said disrespect, then there will be more far-reaching ramifications in the future of the relationship. You already know this, it is why you left him. The person you love no longer exists, he has been replaced by someone who lacks common human decency, and it is never a good idea to associate with such people. Except for here at TK of course.

Get angry at his lack of respect for you as a person. Stay angry. That will help motivate you to move on.
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Wow. That was profoundly true. You are so right. I deserved so much more respect than what I settled for. I came to terms with the fact that he was not ever going to give me the respect I was due, and that is what made me decide to leave.

I appreciate all the serious advice as well as the humourous comments. I feel like I owe you all a copay for behavioral health services.

Your checks are in the mail!!
 
eloisel said:
Gonad is right.

Somebody attack you, you have the right to defend yourself. You don't need her ex-husband's permission to kick her ass, have her arrested, or plain out make her disappear.
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Uhh... She already has an arrest record. No lie.

Anyway, I've come to terms with this. I don't really want any harm to come to the ex-wife or wish that she would disappear. The kids need their mother no matter how irresponsible or mentally unstable she might be. And he needs her, too.
 
Vox Populi said:
BTW... My bad, Dark Pickle... I didn't mean to call you Darth. Some kind of Freudian slip there...
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LOL you wouldn't be the first and most likely won't be the last.

We're both on a lot of the same boards, and have a few of the same friends, but we really don't interact with each other that much ;)
 
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