I thought today was the day

[Mirah]

But I am still alive.

 

[The Tomtrek]

DON'T DIE MIRAH!

 

[Mirah]

Standing on a wobbly surface
changing a light bulb
using a pair of pliers to remove the broken off piece stuck inside the socket
I'm just kidding
I wasn't really standing on a wobbly surface

 

[Mirah]

I might die when my roommate comes home and says something stupid like, "you did it wrong"
Then I will be like
"Fucking bitch! No I didn't!"
And then she will be like, "Yeah you did!"
And then she will be like, "You are killing the earth because you got the wrong kind of bulb" or something like that
but then I will just kill myself instead
just kidding no I won't
I can joke about that kind of stuff right?

 

[Dr Dave]

Damn hippie roomate.

 

[Loktar]

I can joke about that kind of stuff right?

Yes.

*kills self*

I iz ded.

 

[CaptainWacky]

I ate melted cheese and now my chest hurts.

 

[Dr Dave]

That's no good!

 

[Mirah]

Just melted cheese?

 

[Eggs Mayonnaise]

I eat a lot of soy cheese.

My chest doesn't hurt, but it's slowly turning into two boobies.

 

[headvoid]

But I have an image of you as a effortlessly stylish, lithe New York homosexual. A little like Alan Cumming. PLEASE DON'T DESTROY THIS MENTAL IMAGE

 

[Eggs Mayonnaise]

That's who I am on the inside, anyway.

 

[NeonMercuryASH]

No.
You can't joke about that
It would scare us
It would make us cry
We love yas
You have a prick
For a roomate
Always gotta fuck you in the head
Just be careful
Be careful you don't jam a finger
In with the power on

 

[Loktar]

I eat a lot of soy cheese.

My chest doesn't hurt, but it's slowly turning into two boobies.

I already have the boobies, good thing I like wearing bras.

 

[CaptainWacky]

I'm not fat, just destined to die of heart disease at 33.

 

[I Love Cunt]

I finally feel like a normal fucking human being again. That is good because I thought I was going to have to take a stake to my brain or something.

 

[I Love Cunt]

I'm not fat, just destined to die of heart disease at 33.

This tells me so many things.
Mostly that I am probably slightly older than you.
I mean, I am always 28 on the internet.
Carry on.
But wait, this wasn't about me, its about you! Don't die CaptainWacky! Progress has been made! People don't have to die anymore!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

[Dr Dave]

I know ILC's age, and by that I mean I knew it at one point.

 

[I Love Cunt]

I am 50.

 

[I Love Cunt]

Ha hahahahahhHa Ha Ha hahahahh Ha H a ha hahaha aha