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It's official, I'm a chump.

Laker_Girl said:
So my friend just had her baby (I thought we were "best friends" but clearly we are not) and it seems I will be the last person allowed to meet her son.

I was the first person she told she was pregnant, even before the father. Hell, she came to my house to take the home pregnancy test. I am the only person that knows she and her married boyfriend purposely went on fertility drugs to GET pregnant and this wasn't an accident. I was the only friend there for her when her boyfriend left her, pregnant and alone, to "work things out with his wife." I threw her a beautiful baby shower, mostly on my own dime but gave equal credit to her other friend and mom. I've spent more money on manicures, pedicures, gifts for the baby, gifts for her, dinners, breakfasts, lunches, and movies than I care to even think about and won't even get into all the money she insisted would be a "loan" and has yet to pay back. When it came to who was going to be in the delivery room with her did she ask me? OH GOD NO! She asked her other friend because she is a "more consistant friend", nevermind the fact that I was the one she was heavily leaning on for support, financially and emotionally. I was hurt but I let it go and continued to be as good a friend to her as ever. Fate stepped in and my friend ended up having a C-section so her friend wasn't allowed in to see the birth anyway, just her mother. That was good for me, not that I would have ever wished that, I wouldn't but it was quite a coincidence. Unfortunately the baby was born with some sort of infection and has been in the hospital for a week now, my friend was discharged last Sunday. I stupidly thought I should lay low, give my friend time to rest and lots of space but all that got me was another slap in the face. Her son is coming home today and when I asked if I could come over and maybe meet him Saturday she said to me, "Well, I don't know, there are a lot of people that have to meet him first."

Yep, I'm an idiot. I am trying so hard not to build a wall between myself and people, I'm trying to stay as loving and compassionate as I've always been but this kind of thing is just one more brick.

Thanks for the space to rant. :bigass: Now feel free to bash me!
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I've been stuck in a rut recently, too.

Example: Yesterday, after asking a possible realtor I was thinking about using (via e-mail) for some rather simple (I thought, anyway) info on what percentages everybody will get when I sell my house, her head spun around 360 and began to vomit green puke. Or, the e-mail response seemed like that's what she did. I mean, I know I excel in pissing people off, but come on. I was even nice to her.

Ah, well. She's out $20k, at least. I'm not. :bigass:
 
Jethro said:
If it is any consolation, I wouldn't want you meeting my son either.
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I'm not into ugly guys so that's cool with me.

Anyhoo, I think Enk hit the nail on the head, my friend just doesn't care about me as much as I do her. Plan B is in effect as we speak.

I did a lot of thinking about things last night and to be totally honest, I think part of my problem with my friend is my own. What I mean is, the cheese stands very much alone. I am quite literally the only one of my close-knit group of friends that isn't married and/or has children. I'm not saying that I'd want to be stuck in a loveless marriage or having a child I can't afford but damn, it's lonely feeling when it's just you. The worst part is, I was totally expecting a marriage proposal on New Year's Eve and there's no way in hell that's going to happen. Woe-is-me, how pathetic huh?

Fuck it, I'll live.
 
I would rather be alone for the rest of my life, than settle for something less than. Being a party of one is only difficult if you cannot accept, and be comfortable, with your aloneness. However, you have made a good start by being reflective upon your situation and relationships. Finding the patterns in our life make changing those parts that don't work much easier.

Sorry about the engagement falling through, but in the end, if it can't work now, it's better to know about it than find out on your Honeymoon. Now, that's true lonliness.

Christimas time seems to magnify our daily hurts. You'll be okay. Keep up with the introspection inventory, so you won't have to repeat this scenario with someone new.
 
Oh it's not that my boyfriend and I aren't getting married ever, we will I just won't be getting proposed to on New Year's Eve like I'd hoped.

An Update: My friend called me this morning and told me that she brought her son home yesterday afternoon then at about 5:00PM she asked me if I'd like to come over and meet him so I did of course. I maybe should not have jumped to conclusions but then again I'm also more cautious with my friend, I will not be fooled again.
 
Harvey Keitel says to say "hi", to you personally, btw (just had lunch with him yesterday)
 
^^^AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!! Of all your many lies (Concierge of a 5-diamond hotel, real estate mogul, not a child molester) this has to be the most ridiculous.
 
Check to see if Harvey has a Stowe house or not Mr Doofus. He's a member of our SPA (has been for years)

You my friend, have just been pwned :bigass:
 
The "spa" at the "only Mobil 5-diamond hotel in Vermont"? That one? The one I said I would call and you said, "Call all you want, I don't work there"? That one, liar?

You are pathetic; the only actor you could think to like about having lunch with is a washed-up has been. Er...just like you...except you've never been anything.
 
Big Dick McGee said:
The "spa" at the "only Mobil 5-diamond hotel in Vermont"? That one? The one I said I would call and you said, "Call all you want, I don't work there"? That one, liar?

You are pathetic; the only actor you could think to like about having lunch with is a washed-up has been. Er...just like you...except you've never been anything.
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pm me for the phone number loser....then you can call me directly (right through the hotel), and then you can eat shit and die when you admit you're wrong :bigass:
 
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