CaptainWacky
I want to smell dark matter
"I'm getting not-married! I'm having a commitment thing!" said Johnny, to the old man on the park bench.
"That's great, sonny!" said the old man.
"This isn't crazy, is it?" asked Johnny, checking. "Me talking to you?"
"Why would that be crazy?"
"Sometimes I talk to people and they think it's crazy of me. People don't want to be talked to, it seems."
"Well, I do."
"Of course, you're old! That's where I've been going wrong all these years! I should only talk to OLD strangers, not just any random stranger! The old love to talk!"
"We sure do! Why, I remember the time I was eating liver and onions and a young man came up and asked, very politely, if he could have some of my live...and that young man grew up to be Big Daddy! The wrestler!"
"Is that true?"
"No, just made it up."
"Haha, you're crazy! Like an older version of me!"
"MUCH older, sonny!"
"Hahaha! So, are you married?"
"Nah. Never could settle down. I just love pussy so much."
"Grandad!"
"What?"
"You said a rude word!"
"I'm old, I can say what I want! I can chance the Charlsteon if I want! LOOK AT ME GO, WHOO!"
The old man got up and started dancing. It was at this point that Johnny noticed wheelchair Zoe.
"YOU!" he said. "Stay here, pops, I'll be right back!" Johnny vaulted off the bench and ran over to wear Zoe had been. But she was gone. "How did she get away so quickly?" he asked no on. He made his way back to the bench. The old man was still dancing.
"I'm a dancin' fool!" said the coot.
"Aren't you tired?" asked Johnny.
"Nah! Not me! I'm full of beans! And cocaine!"
"Pops!"
"Only joksking! HAHAHA!"
"You crazy old coot! Hey, did you happen to see a wheelchair bitch?"
"Nope. Sure you didn't imagine it?"
"Like I'd imagine something like that! It was her! Staring at me with her cold dead wheelchair eyes, plotting and planning. She wants to bring me down, to ruin things between me and Lisa. Her and Fists McGee! Both out to ruin me! I'm surprised he isn't here too -THERE HE IS...no, that's a cat - he hates me so much! But I won't let them get me down!"
"Maybe I didn't see them because I'm old and have bad eyes."
"Yeah, that must be it."
"AHAHAHAHAHA, I'M A-DANCIN'!"
"You're too loud."
"NOT ME, NOT LOUD MCGEE!"
"MCGEE!? You're...you're Fists' grandfather! Spying for him! You're all out to get me!"
"Oh calm the fuck down, you young idiot. I'm here to help you. Stop panicking about Zoe, Fists and the rest...you have the girl of your dreams. Stop trying to sabotage it."
"What do you mean?" But the old man said nothing. Johnny sat down on the bench and closed his eyes for a moment. When he opened them again, the old man was gone. "I'm not trying to sabotage anything," Johnny said, to himself. "I love Lisa...everything is going to be perfect with her...forever and ever...and ever..."
"That's great, sonny!" said the old man.
"This isn't crazy, is it?" asked Johnny, checking. "Me talking to you?"
"Why would that be crazy?"
"Sometimes I talk to people and they think it's crazy of me. People don't want to be talked to, it seems."
"Well, I do."
"Of course, you're old! That's where I've been going wrong all these years! I should only talk to OLD strangers, not just any random stranger! The old love to talk!"
"We sure do! Why, I remember the time I was eating liver and onions and a young man came up and asked, very politely, if he could have some of my live...and that young man grew up to be Big Daddy! The wrestler!"
"Is that true?"
"No, just made it up."
"Haha, you're crazy! Like an older version of me!"
"MUCH older, sonny!"
"Hahaha! So, are you married?"
"Nah. Never could settle down. I just love pussy so much."
"Grandad!"
"What?"
"You said a rude word!"
"I'm old, I can say what I want! I can chance the Charlsteon if I want! LOOK AT ME GO, WHOO!"
The old man got up and started dancing. It was at this point that Johnny noticed wheelchair Zoe.
"YOU!" he said. "Stay here, pops, I'll be right back!" Johnny vaulted off the bench and ran over to wear Zoe had been. But she was gone. "How did she get away so quickly?" he asked no on. He made his way back to the bench. The old man was still dancing.
"I'm a dancin' fool!" said the coot.
"Aren't you tired?" asked Johnny.
"Nah! Not me! I'm full of beans! And cocaine!"
"Pops!"
"Only joksking! HAHAHA!"
"You crazy old coot! Hey, did you happen to see a wheelchair bitch?"
"Nope. Sure you didn't imagine it?"
"Like I'd imagine something like that! It was her! Staring at me with her cold dead wheelchair eyes, plotting and planning. She wants to bring me down, to ruin things between me and Lisa. Her and Fists McGee! Both out to ruin me! I'm surprised he isn't here too -THERE HE IS...no, that's a cat - he hates me so much! But I won't let them get me down!"
"Maybe I didn't see them because I'm old and have bad eyes."
"Yeah, that must be it."
"AHAHAHAHAHA, I'M A-DANCIN'!"
"You're too loud."
"NOT ME, NOT LOUD MCGEE!"
"MCGEE!? You're...you're Fists' grandfather! Spying for him! You're all out to get me!"
"Oh calm the fuck down, you young idiot. I'm here to help you. Stop panicking about Zoe, Fists and the rest...you have the girl of your dreams. Stop trying to sabotage it."
"What do you mean?" But the old man said nothing. Johnny sat down on the bench and closed his eyes for a moment. When he opened them again, the old man was gone. "I'm not trying to sabotage anything," Johnny said, to himself. "I love Lisa...everything is going to be perfect with her...forever and ever...and ever..."